All right, so I had this mission beta'd by Zingenmir sometime in July last year, but I've had it buried in my Google Docs until now because of certain timeline issues in my writing. Basically I'd had a bunch of missions I'd planned to publish before this one, but... that's what my question is about.

Here's the mission. It has mentions of BL2 and BL10 from the Discord blacklist, so... beware of that.

So, the thing is... I've looked over some of my old PPC missions from about two years ago, and boy, did I cringe. I guess I'm not alone with that, but I also don't feel very comfortable with my current writing. I feel like I'm just not funny enough for the PPC - I was rereading some classic missions like Ring Child that are genuinely laugh-out-loud hilarious, but I've never really noticed that kind of quality in my own writing. Now, I realize that this could be because I'm so familiar with my own punchlines they don't even register to me anymore after editing and re-editing the thing. But I really don't feel like I'm on the level of writing skill where I should be if I want to keep writing in this continuum (I know nobody here expects me to create a Nobel laureate PPC fic, but I'm very critical of my own stuff). So I'd like to ask for some in-depth feedback on what I could improve about this mission and future ones, especially in the comedy department. I mean, I'm not demanding feedback because I know we all have little time and fewer spoons, but... it would be a big help to me. I don't want to lose my joy in writing for the PPC because I love this community, but it's hard when I keep looking at my own writing and frowning. I'm also scrapping a bunch of planned missions because I used to focus way hard on the squicky fics most sane people wouldn't touch with a ten-foot spork, and that's just not fun to me anymore. I'm way hard to shock with bad writing, but I also don't want to go overboard with the squick because there's only so much graphic unpleasantness I can take before it starts to grate on my nerves as a writer and reader. So I guess I'm trying to start anew as a writer here, I'll just need a little advice on how to.

So... I hope y'all will enjoy this mission, and I would be grateful for any comments on my writing.

(Mirage disappears in a puff of Urple smoke)