I’m very bored, so this is what happens. (Edit: thought of some more)

I will not borrow Agent Zara’s pet mutant bear Bella to scare my partner

-If Bella gets hurt, I will realize that I have pissed off an insane Bloodwrather with a flamethrower and accept all consequences that come with it

-Bella will just try to cuddle with my partner anyways

Agent Diamond is not related to Dracula

-She’s a Twipire

-The red and black high-necked cape is a complete coincidence

I will not play Rammstein in the hearing range of Agent Zara unless I wish to hear—in order—about the band itself, what certain songs are about, and a live performance

I am not allowed to feed canon characters I don’t like to the tentacle monster in Thalia and Doom’s RC bathroom

-Or agents that I don’t like

The Greeneyes are not the Illuminati and I will not try to convince anyone they are

-Besides, it only inflates Tsarmina’s already oversized ego

I am not permitted to use Ouija Boards to summon demons

-I am not allowed to speak to demons in the mirror

-I am not allowed to open a portal to hell in my bathroom

-I am not allowed to summon demons, period

Just because an agent happens to know an author, I am not allowed to pester them with my ideas for the author’s books

-My ideas are not good and do I really need to be told that bringing in the Kraken isn’t going to end well?

I will not feed Sues to the Kraken, it’s getting quite fat

I am not allowed to chant “Ravioli, ravioli, give me the one ringoli” at Frodo and company

-I am not allowed to chant “Ravioli, ravioli, give the [insert item here] at anyone

Toothbrushes are to be used for brushing my teeth only

-And whoever made a toothbrush guitar needs to stop playing it over the loudspeakers

-Really, we don’t even want to know how you made it

If someone canonically carries a Very Big Sword TM, I’m not allowed to ask if they’re overcompensating for anything

-Being stabbed hurts