Subject: ThatÂ’s an unhealthy speed :-)
Author:
Posted on: 2015-02-08 19:35:00 UTC

I’m overworked reading so much in such a short time, but I cannot not read your missions, they are too good.

Anyway, the usual nitpicking:

The Sue use her fire powers to heat up some sausage for Ron,
Tense shift.

and the scene swirled, dumping Zeb in the middle of the first head girls' dormitory.
You probably meant "first year girls’ dormitory", or "first-year girls’ dormitory" (JKR writes “first-years” with a hyphen) or maybe "first-year-girls’ dormitory" (I’m not sure whether JKR ever used something similar to the latter).

Also, beginning three consecutive sentences with "He" (starting with "He opened the bag ...") is a bit repetitive.

Seven years in three chapters? What did this chick think?

HG

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