I hope you replaced the entire page with exclamation marks.

Subject: I hope you replaced the entire page with exclamation marks.
Author: Larfen J. Stocke, esq
Posted on: 2016-03-22 05:30:00 UTC

Otherwise, you've, if anything, made it worse.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!

!

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I think I may have found another Canon Sue... by Kelpie on 2016-03-18 19:36:00 UTC Reply

So, the other day I went to the library and I found a book that looked interesting, so I took it out. Bad move. While the writing itself was interesting and engaging, the main character just made me cringe. So if anyone is planning on ever reading the book (series), you might not want to read this.

The book is 'Keeper of the Lost Cities' by Shannon Messenger.

SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now that the formalities are out of the way, I wanted to get out my frustrations. Keep in mind, I actually did enjoy the book and this is in no way meant to bash her writing, I just found the main character, Sophie Foster, to be a classic textbook case of a sue.

To begin, her backstory:
She is an exceptionally smart twelve year old who is a high school senior who has been accepted to Yale. Of course, being a genius isn't all. She had a really bad accident when she was five and became a telepath.

That isn't so bad though, so I got through the whole genius thing. Whatever. But it's the fact that she is an elf as well that kind of irritated me. I can forgive that one more easily since 90% of the characters are elves.

But just in point form, here are some of the other irritating things about her:

- She is a genetic experiment
- Only elf with brown eyes
- Extremely powerful
- Popular with all the guys (even ones who are years older than her. She's twelve in the first book for goodness sake!)
- Photographic Memory
- Has forbidden secret information planted in her head
- Has way too many cute animal friends to count
- Can communicate with aforementioned animals telepathically
- Does so many things that are illegal to the elven laws but is never seriously punished for them
- Gets kidnapped for her abilities, but is completely fine afterwards (well, sort of. But it relates to my next point)
- She is self-sacrificing and tries to be a martyr
- Can read the minds of anyone she wants to, and they can't read hers at all. Even the oldest and wisest elves can't.
- Does some things that are deemed impossible
- Runs away from home because of some tragic event but is rescued by the hot guy she likes
- Can speak any language with no effort at all

and more. It just frustrated me so much, but at least the other more normal characters helped me get past the horror of her growing repertoire of skills. Once again, the writing wasn't bad, but I am still debating going back and reading the second book.

(Yes, this entire list was composed of things I remembered a day later and all from the first book.)

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I read the Tropes page. WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE WORLD? (nm) by Silenthunder on 2016-03-20 17:24:00 UTC Reply

It's very professionally written. by Larfen J. Stocke, esq on 2016-03-21 05:46:00 UTC Reply

'WE NEED ANSWERS SHANNON!!!'

Why stop with three exclamation marks, anonymous troper? Why not go all the way?

W!E!!NEE!D!!AN!SW!ERS!!SH!AN!NON!!!

Editor Girl to the rescue! by LonelyStar on 2016-03-21 22:31:00 UTC Reply

I have a Tv Tropes account. It's fixed now.

I hope you replaced the entire page with exclamation marks. by Larfen J. Stocke, esq on 2016-03-22 05:30:00 UTC Reply

Otherwise, you've, if anything, made it worse.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!

!

My Changes by LonelyStar on 2016-03-23 03:28:00 UTC Reply

I just changed the format to better fit with TV Tropes standard and deleted some of the editorializing. I'm not a vandal.

Don't mind Larfen, he's just trying to be helpful. by Desdendelle on 2016-03-23 07:12:00 UTC Reply

*raven noises*

I'm pretty good at that, I reckon. (nm) by Larfen J. Stocke, esq on 2016-03-23 07:43:00 UTC Reply

I've been misremembering... by Desdendelle on 2016-03-23 16:38:00 UTC Reply

This line.

You misremembered a whole 13 minute video? by Larfen J. Stocke, esq on 2016-03-24 05:52:00 UTC Reply

That's a lot of video to remember incorrectly, I ought to say.

This is.... by DCCCV on 2016-03-19 13:44:00 UTC Reply

Somewhat comparable to this one character my friend made. I do not want to talk about the dual wielding vampire with demigod powers. What the keck, I'm going to take this as a book recommendation. But... lithium? To my knowledge, it doesn't give off rays. Does she have to ingest it? It's such a random thing. I don't know, elf comes at me, I pull out a battery? I can only assume that she somehow ends up "overcoming" this, and that's going to be the only character development she goes through. Grfumpherdoodles.
-DCCCV, who is checking his library catalogue right now.

No, no, no, no, no. by DCCCV on 2016-03-20 09:40:00 UTC Reply

I looked at the cover, realized I saw it somewhere, took a look at the tvtropes page, and now I see that this series ends up getting more messed up than Tunnels. I do not need another book series about *spoilers* and *spoilers*. Yep, this girl is definitely another Canon Sue. What she does to people is horrific.
-DCCCV, who is looking at himself, intimidated at her general superiority.

Wow. Just. Just wow. by Kelpie on 2016-03-20 15:36:00 UTC Reply

Alright, I just took a look at the TV tropes page. Never going there again. Like, what the heck? This is supposed to be young teen fiction!
She has brown eyes! (nm) by Larfen J. Stocke, esq on 2016-03-20 10:24:00 UTC Reply

Sorry, it was 'limbium' by Kelpie on 2016-03-19 15:49:00 UTC Reply

And I don't even know what the heck limbium even is. I wish it was lithium though. So much easier to get a hold of. I think she just reacts to the metal itself, like how people can't wear earrings unless they are silver or something. And she has an antidote/allergy medicine around her neck at all times. But at least it's an anaphylactic reaction. And good luck. I think there's 5 books in that series. I probably will read the others just so I can see how much worse it can (and will) get.

Ah, limbium. by Scapegrace on 2016-03-20 02:09:00 UTC Reply

The only metal harvested from arms and legs. =]

Haha! by Kelpie on 2016-03-20 15:25:00 UTC Reply

Of course it is. She is allergic to the cruelty....

Ugh. (nm) by Irrelevant on 2016-03-19 10:08:00 UTC Reply
Okay, I take it back by Kelpie on 2016-03-19 03:16:00 UTC Reply

I read a teaser of the first two chapters of the second book. Big mistake. In less than 2 chapters she had already gotten yet another ability, to inflict emotions/pain, etc on people and had mentally communicated with an alicorn who now apparently trusts only her. Who is also the second one they have ever found in millenia and was extremely rare. It also happens to be the opposite gender of the one they already had. She also effortlessly teleports it back to her house. Wow. And it is only book 2 of 5. Should I read the rest so no one else has to? And I think it actually has a fanfic archive, but will get back on that one. They might be better (or more likely worse) than the original.

Now I'm intrested in checking these books out... (nm) by Silenthunder on 2016-03-19 17:40:00 UTC Reply

Yikes. (nm) by eatpraylove on 2016-03-19 02:15:00 UTC Reply
Mary Eisenhart, reviewer says: by Larfen J. Stocke, esq on 2016-03-19 00:16:00 UTC Reply

'with believable, complex characters'

I'm not doubting the complexity, mate. There's no better possible word out there to describe a telepathic mutant elf who got into Yale at 12 years old and can speak any language.
Complex? That's complex, alright, bloody fabulous job there. Like looking at international political relationships under an electron microscope while wearing sunglasses, it's that complex.

I think I may have to hold the believable, though.
Not sure why. It's probably the brown eyes.

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When I say that, I am not referring to her by Kelpie on 2016-03-19 03:01:00 UTC Reply

I was actually referring to all the other more interesting characters but her. She has the depth of a really shallow puddle.

Don't worry, I wasn't talking about you. by Larfen J. Stocke, esq on 2016-03-19 07:02:00 UTC Reply

I was going on about Mary Eisenhart, some random reviewer I saw when I searched the series up.
Unless there's something you'd like to tell us.

Oh, I think I misunderstood by Kelpie on 2016-03-19 15:42:00 UTC Reply

Secrets? What secrets? Anyways, sorry for that misunderstanding. I thought that that's what you were saying. That's what I get for not paying attention I guess...

Don't think you can fool me. by Larfen J. Stocke, esq on 2016-03-20 07:42:00 UTC Reply

I can see right through you, Mary.

I'm not Mary by Kelpie on 2016-03-20 15:27:00 UTC Reply

To be fair though, I do agree with her review. But, whatever floats your boat. I guess I'll just have to start responding to Mary now.

Like clear glass... by Larfen J. Stocke, esq on 2016-03-21 05:20:00 UTC Reply

Like a telescope...
Like clean water...
Like a ghost...

Ridiculous?? by Superfluity on 2016-03-18 22:51:00 UTC Reply

I'm just shuddering listening to this description of this girl. But my biggest concern is that men years older than her show her interest and that's a thing that happens? When she's 12?

I probably should have clarified a bit better by Kelpie on 2016-03-19 15:45:00 UTC Reply

What I meant was that all of the older guys in her school like her. They're a max of 5 or so years older. And the only people who seem to hate her are the typical mean girl and one of the elders who she upstaged at one point.

I feel marginally better by Superfluity on 2016-03-23 01:57:00 UTC Reply

I was worried it was romantic in nature and was a little bit squicked. But hey, at least some one had enough sense to hate her, even if it was part of their character trope to do so.

Maralagidyne this. by Hardric on 2016-03-18 22:37:00 UTC Reply

No, wait, she's surely immune. Megidolaon it. There we'll be sure.

Lithium should work by Kelpie on 2016-03-19 02:53:00 UTC Reply

To be honest, lithium is the only thing she is allergic to and canonically nearly died when exposed to it.

*shudders* by Ivy-M-Blue on 2016-03-18 20:37:00 UTC Reply

Oh, dear. She's an... Elf? Going to Yale? When she's twelve? I am both morbidly curious and mind-boggled that the editors have this book the "okay."
Oh my... Kill it with Igni! X__X by Matt Cipher on 2016-03-18 20:10:00 UTC Reply

That's almost 'Stephenie Meyer' level of bad!

I'm right with ya, Matt. Seriously, that's bad. However! by Silenthunder on 2016-03-19 02:49:00 UTC Reply

An elf in disguise going to a high-school is an interesting idea, if it could be pulled off. For every idea that seems impossible, someone is there to make it possible.