I bequeath to you an urple Awake. Treat it well, for it has a great destiny before it. Or gas. It may just have gas.

Seventeen, A ripe, good age I have not reached yet (soon...)But I missed it! I'm sorry, but what can I possibly give for compensation... hmmm... Oh, I know! It's supposed to be for my brother, but since I did not miss his birthday, and after-birthdays can be even more fun than the actual day, here is a certificate to one Pinkie Pie Party for one whole day! It will be insane, but if you know Pinkie, then you know how nuts it can be. No garantes you won't die in a terrible forth wall acident though.
(But hey, come on, how cool would it be if you were crushed under the forth wall!)
You're dead.
(Yes, but imagine millions would be *sunglasses* watching the funeral.)
That was a terrible joke. Still, being crushed by a immanganary force used for theater... It would be talked about for years.

Ummm....*goes through pockets*...here it is! Have a Mini-Saber Lion named Artura.

Never mind the Twilight similarities, seventeen is a lovely age, not that I would know... *coughI'monlyfifteencough*. Have a birthday hat as a celebratory gift!

The game of Pin the Tail on the Balrog shall continue! This time with a cake in the flavor of your choice and some confetti.

*Throws an entire basket of confetti in the air and walks off to let someone else clean it up*

I personally liked 19 the most... Lucky you, for you it is still something to look forward to. :)

Herpy birthderp! Have some lemming repellant!

Wow 17 already!^^
I feel so young xD
Anyways, enjoy your day! Eat lots of cake! :D

Have a Minecraft dog!

You are now of age, if you're living in the wizarding world. If not, you have to wait another year. (Or not, depending on your country of residence.)

For that astronomy reference, have a full color map of the solar system. And my nostalgia. (I was a huge astronomy nerd as a little kid, and you saying "orbit" triggered memories)

*Solemnly places a party hat on Lilac's head, then leaves as mysteriously as she came.*

♪And a happy new year!♪

Also, Twilight.

Have a special triple chocolate cupcake! Don't forget to blow out the candle!

Have a Balvhakara suit of power armor!

Hey, my birthday is tomorrow. I wonder how many other Boarders had their birthdays within the same two days or so?

Yay, happy seventeenth! -huggles- Here, have a war moose as a present.

And if movie!Thranduil comes asking where you got it, it's totally not his. :D

And have some Nm&Nms!