Because black cloaks are cool! ;)

Hi there, since I'm probably very late and probably someone else told you evrrything you need to know, I'll be giving ya your gifts: A replica of the One Ring that does... uh... something, not sure what, but apparently is bigger in the inside. And this replica of Lowbacca's lightsaber.

Hi, I'm Alleb, and welcome to the PPC! I'm sort of new as well; I joined back in May. Have an urple ocarina!

-Alleb

Here, have a slice of Infinite Pizza! If you have any sort of questions, comments, or just need a bloke to talk to, feel free to mail me at mattcipher94 with a gmail tag :D

Welcome to the board and here is a glittery light pen. It has no color, only glitter.

Oh man, this'll be confusing. At the very least your name's spelled differently...

Here's your starter Pokémon:

Iiiiiiit's Seaking!

And your starting item is:

20/20 from The Binding Of Isaac: Afterbirth!

20/20 is a pretty damn awesome item, effectively acting like a weaker Parental Bond in item form. In addition to boosting your accuracy by one stage, 20/20 allows you to hit again for 33% damage after a successful strike, rounded up. Seaking can make pretty good use of this, so you should try it on a pure damage Physical set with Aqua Tail, Drill Run, Megahorn, and Knock Off. Normally Waterfall would be preferred here, but the fact of it is that Seaking isn't really fast enough to get a flinch off unboosted, so it's worth just going for damage.

Take this bag of super dark chocolate. Light itself will be sucked up.

I was quite a bit of lurker before I join too, partly because, also just like you, I tendo to be rather shy. So I definitely get where you're coming from. People around here are indeed quite amazing, not only as writers, but also as friends. We are very nice and welcoming around here, so I have no doubt that soon enough you will feel that you are part of this wonderful community.

Now, for your welcoming gifts. Have a Bag of Holding, so that you have something to store in the truckload of gifts you're getting, your very own Muggle-Use Wand, and a Rorschach Book, which can change into any written text in existence. You need to close your eyes while holding it, think about the text you wanna read and then blink three times.

Please take this phone. It can become a Jetpack, disarm bombs, and can allow your soul to fire what I can only describe as "Soul Bolts," as well as make calls, texts, and access to your social networks.

Here's a box of popcorn to eat while you read the Important Stuff Seafarer pointed you to. Enjoy your stay!

What's your preferred pronoun? Also, here, have this cup of Early Earl Grey tea. No, the leaves won't try to eat your face when you drink from it, promise.

Have a welcome plate of freshly-made SPaGhetti!

Seafarer already pointed you to the Important Stuff, so I'll just say "Hope you like it here!"

Nice to meet you! Here, have a pencil. It's magic, y'see, so it won't run out.
I'm guessing you've read all the Important Links at the top of the page? In particular, make sure you read and understand the Constitution.
Now, I'm going to dive out of the way before Iximaz gets here...

Along with one of my own shed feathers, have a working replica of the Golden Snitch and a magic ring that totally doesn't make you invisible!