First, before I begin my review proper, it is an absolute joy to have the opportunity to read a well written piece of derivative fiction. Clear craft and care has been taken by the author to compose this short story, and in my view, it was well worth every moment. Second, I will be doing a thorough review. If you have not taken the time to read the story in question, I insist you read it before continuing, as I will be discussing critical plot points, including the ending. Assuming you have read the piece, I shall move along.
Something tells me that this is a form of personal story. While clearly the author cannot lay brush to canvas and have butterflies flutter through the air, the emotional journey Canvas goes through feels inspired by events the author has gone though themselves. I shudder to imagine what may have been the inspiration, as an asylum seems the most logical conclusion. Some of my colleagues who required mental care have spoken to me at length of the various treatments undergone inside mental care hospitals, for better or for worse. The depiction of severe retrograde amnesia is particularly vivid, and one of the great draws to this story. I am currently unaware of any procedure utilized in Equestira or World One which would produce such an effect, yet it does seem at the very least plausible.
The characterization of Canvas and Twilight Sparkle shines though. Save for one instance of Twilight using the word "scum" to describe the prisoners that felt far too harsh for her, she seemed truly alive and in character. You can see her transition from cold intellectual, to caring teacher, to pitying empathizer flow in a smooth, natural way. Her character journey is the set for Canvas to play on, and his performance is stellar. This poor pony has lost his very identity and though this purple visitor, he begins to find himself again, and the reality he lost. And yet, we see it come crashing down again, as even his very name is forcibly removed from his memory. It is truly crushing, and provides the main strength of the piece. For many, this will be the highlight of the story, and the reason they will recommend it so. At least, were it not for one other aspect.
Due to the nature of Canvas's story, and his rediscovery of color itself, the author has chosen to incorporate a visual nature to the text, by coloring particular words and passages. The majority of the text is white on a black background, highlighting the dual nature of Canvas's perception of the world. When he learns of a new color or feels an emotion that he associates with each color, the text changes appropriately. This use of color, providing stark contrast to the rest of the text, lets the reader feel what Canvas sees, let them experience the discovery of color. This is beautifully done, and a creative use of the digital medium.
On the whole, this is a powerful emotional journey, that pulls at the heartstrings, and makes one truly think on the nature of color. There are, however, some detractors to this story that makes me hesitate before giving grand praise. Namely, in the implications of the outside world, and the nature of the institution Canvas finds himself in.
There is a pattern within certain My Little Pony fan works that suggests (or, indeed, outright states) that Princess Celestia is far more tyrannical then one would be led to believe. While discussion on Celestia's politics is important, especially in the ways one disagrees, never has there been any evidence nor rumor of the Princess incarcerating innocents who may pose a threat to her power, nor banishment upon the slightest infraction. Why, then, do we see an institution meant to hold and "correct" those blessed with abilities far beyond those of the average pony? The poor foal was imprisoned at the age of eight*! He had not lived long enough to insight rebellion or pose any threat to the State. While understandable behavior in the Marvel or Detective Comics universes, it is simply horrific for any Equestrian to even imagine such a thing would occur. Speaking purely for myself, I am rather tired of this trope. Celestia is no tyrant, in the political or contemporary sense of the word. The return of Discord alone should show how merciful she is. Indeed, it is to a fault her willingness to forgive. She would be horrified by the idea of innocent ponies being tortured for the mere crime of holding grand power. The continued slander towards her name is has reached a point where I wonder what she has possibly done to earn such resentment by such a large number of the community.
However, every complaint of mine could be resolved with one simple change. Take the setting out of Equestria. Place it in World One, have Canvas be a mutant of some form. Humans fear that which they do not understand. Many World One governments would seek to remove any perceived threat to themselves or their power quickly. Corruption and mistreatment of those who are labeled as different is well documented there. Which highlights the largest problem with the derivative story; there is no need for the use of Equestria. The only reason I can see is to use the colors of Twilight Sparkle's friends to solidify the emotional connection Canvas holds with each individual color. And yet, Canvas describes these connections so vividly, it hardly requires additional support, and where it does, the colored text provides plenty.
As a short story, I highly recommend White Box. It is a chilling tale of a man who has lost quite literally everything, including the very concept of color he adores so dearly. However, as a piece of derivative fiction, I cannot fully recommend it. I cannot help but feel the work would be vastly improved by making the story a piece of original fiction, and removing all ties to Equestria. Indeed, perhaps Chromosome could consider publishing the story, and earn some monetary compensation for their work.
~Printworthy
*I understand that equines in World One have far shorter lifespans then us ponies. Equestrian ponies have the same approximate lifespan as the average human.