I shall stop at two.

Subject: I shall stop at two.
Author: Huinesoron
Posted on: 2017-08-11 17:20:00 UTC

Name: Tango Dioxide

Age: Exactly as old as Star Wars itself. She'd rather not think about how old that is. (She's 40.)

Description: Human. Redhead - I mean red, not ginger. PPC agent. Her handful of scars aren't from missions, though - they're from spending most of a decade on the run.

Lust Object: Well, she's married (to Steve, he's a bit wet), but... well, she had a bit of a Thing for Luke Skywalker back in the day. (Though he's too young for her now, obviously.)

Alignment: Grey. When she and Blue discovered the Mary-Sue Factory, he spent the next year in jail for trying to speak out; Tango accepted reassignment and kept her mouth shut.

Notes: Tango is applying because her partner, Nyx, lived in the Star Wars 'verse on and off for seven years, and Tango is fed up of being the less knowledgeable one.

Name: Sha-Non Smi'ith

Age: Ten thousand and seventeen. Or just seventeen.

Description: Jediiiii~! kk so Sha-Non was this super talented Jedi trainee ten thousand years ago but then she was FROZEN IN CARBONITE ten thousand years ago and only woken up, like, last week. Or at least that's what she tells anybody; it may just be an excuse to use bad(e) old(e) English(e), or do we mean Basic(e)?

Also she's a dog-girl, which is like a catgirl but for dogs instead. (I believe there are several species of these around Star Wars, but she doesn't know that.)

Lust Object: Rey and Jyn Erso, though there is a distinct possibility that she doesn't realise they're actually different people.

Alignment: Liiiiight~!

Notes: She has a lightsaber. It is pink. That should tell you everything you need to know about her.

I think I got a bit tangled between 'badfic writer' and 'self-insert' there. In reality, her name is Shannon Smith (... yup), and she's a seventeen-year-old dog-loving Canadian who writes prolifically and without reference to anything except her own memories of the films.

hS

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Somewhere in the reaches of space... by Alleb on 2017-08-11 13:15:00 UTC Reply

The ISD Refiner was almost ready for her new crew: their quarters were prepared, the hangars stood clean and silent for their imminent arrival, the hold was full of consumables. Even the mess halls had fresh coats of paint. The entirety of the ship seemed to wait with bated breath, every detail in place, every hallway swept and gleaming.

Yes, the ISD Refiner was almost ready.

The same could not be said of its occupants.

“For the last time, boy, stop following me!” Darth Vader hissed, one hand on his lightsaber, the other pointed squarely at the mask of his grandchild.

“But—but Grandfather,” Kylo Ren said, edging forward slightly, trying—for the third time that hour—to proffer his own lightsaber, “Uncle Luke said you would sign it for me.”

“He lied,” the dark lord said. His finger shifted targets, moving from the erstwhile Solo child to the uniformed figure that had just walked onto the bridge. “You,” Vader said, his voice well into what any Imperial officer knew as “the death zone.” “I demand you return me to the SWFFA grounds immediately. They know how to treat a Lord of the Sith.” His grip on his lightsaber tightened, the leather of his glove creaking.

“Yep, nope, ain’t happening,” the figure said, her flippant tone contrasting sharply with the neat lines of her white uniform. “Lord Haven and SWFFA are going to be under repairs for quite a while yet. Until then, you and everyone else are stuck in here with me.” She grinned with far too much impudence for someone facing an irate Darth Vader. “Besides, this place will be filled to the gills with shrill, annoying fanwriters by this time tomorrow. You’ll have plenty of ways to vent your anger then.” She sat down in the command chair, ignoring Vader’s hiss of frustration as she scanned the datapad mounted on the arm. “Admiral Piett,” she asked, glancing to the side.

The admiral had been doing his best to become one with the background, but now, most unwillingly, stepped forward. “Yes, er, Tai’shar?” he asked, stumbling over the odd name.

“Coordinator Tai’shar, please,” she said. “At least until I find a better title. I don’t want the fanwriters getting into bad habits. Speaking of, send me that updated list of badficcers, if you would. I want to look over our new… recruits.”

“Aye, Coordinator,” Piett said, turning to his own datapad and tapping it a few times. “List sent.” He stepped back once more, doing his best to avoid any further attention.

“Thank you, Admiral.” Resting her chin on her hand, Tai’shar paged through the list, mentally tuning out the background noise of Kylo Ren’s next attempt at gaining Vader’s signature. It was the usual mix of plausible names, heartily implausible names, and rip-offs of canon characters. She determined, there and then, that every third fanwriter with numbers in their name would be immediately re-assigned to trash compactor cleaning duty, a duty she had, there and then, made up.

She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, still scanning the list. “This,” she said, over the sound of Darth Vader’s lightsaber activating, “is going to be interesting.”

----------------------------------------------------------

In other words, badficcer personas: I need 'em!

To be more clear, this is the "registration" thread for the Star Wars Fan Fiction Academy, Secondary Location (otherwise known as SWFFA2). If you've written Star Wars badfic and want to register your previous badficcer self, or if you just like the idea of being in an OFU and want to create a badficcer self, post 'em below! They can be as much like or unlike you as you wish. Here's a brief form that you can use as a starting point (or ignore and just give a name and nothing else; honestly, either is fine, I just like having something to work with).

Name:

Age:

Description:

Lust Object (if applicable):

Light Side/Dark Side:

Notes:

So, there's that! Big thanks to Badger and Larfen for looking over my short story. Can't wait to see what you all come up with!

-Alleb

Application by LonelyStar on 2017-09-02 03:43:00 UTC Reply

Name: Calls herself Estrelya Chara. Hates to admit that her real name is Annie Lynn.

Age: 16

Chosen Race: Togruta

Description: A young Togruta girl with crimson skin, ivory markings on her face and her four lekku, and sapphire-colored montrals that curve into a vague heart-shape. Her eyes have the look of gorgeous, polished emeralds, and are very quick to notice details.

Can most often be seen in flowing robes in various shades of blue or purple. That is, she would if the OFU would let her, and she's not very good at not tripping in them.

Weapon of Choice (this wasn't actually on the application but she filled it out anyway): A special staff, one end of which paralyzes any machinery it touches, and the other end emits a cutting laser (no, she doesn't actually have any training with this thing- she just made it up for a story of hers).

Lust Object (if applicable): Anakin Skywalker (Darth Vader counts too- she just loves redemption arcs)

Light Side/Dark Side: Was a jedi, before leaving the order as it was growing too stagnant. Currently a grey jedi, but holds to the principles of the light regardless.

Notes:

Enjoys bringing up (and incidentally totally misunderstanding) minor details from canon.

Her badfics, when they're not the standard 'Here Comes the Sue, Watch as She Shoehorns Herself Into Canon', are often redemption stories or attempts to flesh out backstory and lore. Actually sticking with what previous writers have established is secondary.

Has a tendency to make every protagonist (including her description of herself on the OFU application) the special-est of all special snowflakes.

In real world, she's a rather short, pudgy redhead who wears glasses (too much time writing in front of a computer screen) and only wishes she had green eyes. They're actually gray.

She's currently an alien because she didn't take the OFU application seriously (she thought it was just going to be a fun online roleplay) and wrote her idealized Star Wars self into it. She was rather surprised when she discovered that she was turned into a Togruta, and had to learn how to be one from scratch.

Enjoys wearing a golden Togruta montral-dress she made herself (it's actually just craft paper and cardboard, painted gold).
Not getting many outright Dark Siders, are you? by Zingenmir on 2017-08-17 14:25:00 UTC Reply

Let's fix that!

Name: Si'Thar'Liss Ren-Vader!!

Age: 17!!! Like Bella :)) <3 <3 (:

Species: a beautiful mostly-human princess with the potential to be THE MOST POWERFUL SITH LORD EVER EVEN MORE THAN KYLO AND VADER AND THAT EMPEROR GUY (also has cat ears and a dragon tail and butter-fly wings~!!)

Description: a gorgeous young woman, five foot six, with fancily braided mid-length black hair, vivid emerald eyes, and a lot of useful muscle. She doesn't use the Force for *everything*!! Also, the cat ears, dragon tail, and wings from the last section! Oh, and she wears something kind of like Rey's outfit, except sturdier and in black and forest green (to accent her eyes. Also, a complete lack of color is boring).

Lust Object (if applicable): OH MU GOD KYLO REN IS TEH HOTTEST and also Casslian Anderthingy's pretty cool with that accent but KYLO REN AL THE EWAY!!!

(Okay, and Finn. Finn's cute. But he's light side, so it'd never work out...right? :D)

Light Side/Dark Side: Dark Side. OBVIOUSLY. (But, like, with feelings!) [[Yeah, that's a vague Starkid reference that I put in for my own amusement and, in hindsight, because she would've seen the shows and loved them.]]

Notes: Yeah, this is meant to be a fairly generic overblown Kylo Ren fangirl badficcer persona. I will be so very happy if her "butter-fly" wings end up not like a butterfly's but rather like the bread-and-butter-flies that I vaguely remember from Through The Looking-glass--they look exactly like the name describes. I'd also be very happy, however, if she didn't turn out to be as silly in personality as she seems here--she's more of a quiet person with reasonable intelligence and good SPaG skills in her actual writing. She just has a tendency towards extreme silliness in fandom conversations and overblown, under researched plotlines in the Star Wars universe, which isn't actually her primary canon--that would be Harry Potter, which she knows quite well even if she has come out with the occasional unpublished Sue plot for it. (She's not exactly me...but she does have some elements of me at fourteen. I left off the bit about the Dark Side having brownies, though--it's a different Dark Side anyway, I should think.)

She consumes pretty much all media right now, good and bad, and hasn't quite grown up enough to tell the difference consistently (hence having Twilight on the list). She often doesn't catch the faults or unfortunate implications yet. Despite this, she can have a pretty intelligent conversation about Harry Potter or Tamora Pierce's books or Lloyd Alexander's books, not to mention some non-fandom topics.

She'll probably be put off by meeting people who act in real life the way she sounds in this application. Despite that, I'm sure she'd join in half the time once she's over the shock.
My application: by Silenthunder on 2017-08-14 19:20:00 UTC Reply

Name: Serena

Age: 18

Description: A hot light pink female Twi'lek.

Lust Object (if applicable): Han Solo

Light Side/Dark Side: Dark Side, even though I'm not a Jedi! Cos Dark Side is macho!

Notes: I'm a smuggler, admired by Han Solo himself, and an ex-girlfriend of his. Second best smuggler in the galaxy right here!

"Macho" says the pink Twi'lek. by Alleb on 2017-08-16 23:18:00 UTC Reply

I do have one question: What's the fanwriter behind this character like? Their real name, the kind of fics they write, that sort of thing?

-Alleb

Let's give this a go by Thoth on 2017-08-14 14:26:00 UTC Reply

Name: Leo "Ironsides"

Age: 18

Race: Human (Mandalorian)

Description: A grey Jedi dual-wielding a silver lightsaber and a darksaber. And a rotary blaster. Also he has a jetpack. And he wears the cloak of a Sith Inquisitor as a trophy, because he's killed so many of them.

Lust Object: None, unless canon introduces a katana-wielding Mandalorian soldier who is also a ninja.

Light/Dark: Grey! He helps the rebels, and is prone to beserker rages. Edgy!

Notes: Leo primarily writes action fics. He knows canon like the back of his hand (which is to say, approximately, and in broad strokes), but can't spell any of it. There is no evidence that Toey is involved. Lots of godmode sues, and "deep" characters.

He tends to write with his sister, who isn't here because she knows what she's doing.

Wants his nickname to be "Ironsides." This will never happen.

Edgy! by Alleb on 2017-08-16 23:16:00 UTC Reply

Pffft, I love this guy already. Thank you! Also, hello, newbie! Sorry I haven't commented on your thread--welcome to the PPC! My gift to you is a highly-fashionable cloak. Don't mind the sparkly blood stains.

-Alleb

Re: Edgy! by Thoth on 2017-08-17 04:33:00 UTC Reply

Thanks for the cloak!

A good bit of this came from a friend of mine. Including the name (I asked first). Not a real name, of course...

Suffice to say, a good bit of description came from him - I asked for ideas - as did some of the characterization. Although in REAL life he's actually an excellent writer. And a good enough sport to get in on this :-).

You may meet him soon enough.

*appears* by Grundleplith The Dorf on 2017-09-18 23:42:00 UTC Reply

Such is my shame, I contributed the aforementioned concept for this blasterdization of a Mando.

Application! by Jay - AC on 2017-08-13 03:10:00 UTC Reply

Name: Arvinaz Perricos

Age: 14

Description: A super-awesome (and tall and muscular) Lasat force-user, but not smelly like Zeb, with a bo-rifle that has a lightsaber mode along with the blaster and quarterstaff modes. He has purple skin and green eyes, like most Lasats, but bright blue hair also. It looks boss. Arvinaz is scarred (not physically, mentally and emotionally) from the Empire's genocide of Lasan. He survived it, obviously, and is a heroic lone rebel and protector of the people (kinda like Robin Hood, except better, because Star Wars).

Lust Object: Han Solo. Totally. I mean, who doesn't have a crush on him? Also, prequel!Obi-Wan is really hot.

Light Side/Dark Side: Light Side! Though Arvinaz sometimes uses the Dark Side against the Empire because it's more powerful, but he doesn't like to do it.

In real life, Arvinaz is a very insecure teen named Julian Michaelson who writes OCs to deal with those insecurities. Julian is also a much too enthusiastic slash shipper, regardless of what Canon says about any of his ships. Prides self on knowing all the lore and nerdy bits of fandoms, but doesn't really care about actually using his information in fanfiction.

You had me at "lightsaber mode." by Alleb on 2017-08-16 23:08:00 UTC Reply

Thank you very much!

-Alleb

No prob! by Jay - AC on 2017-08-19 04:36:00 UTC Reply

I've been waiting for a SWFFA for such a long time. Bravo for picking it up, and good luck.

Just want to say kudos and good luck! by Neshomeh on 2017-08-12 15:07:00 UTC Reply

And, because this idea literally just came to me, how would you like an AU tweeny!fanboy!Nume to play with? He's that obnoxious spotty thirteen-year-old who can quote every obscure piece of lore to ruin everyone's day (including the canon characters, especially the reboot ones where they contradict the EU he's used to) and has absolutely zero social skills.

Goes by the name of Cuthaan Starkiller and probably fancies himself a Jedi, even though he is the worst. Don't give him any weapons if you value your life or your property ~~wait who am I kidding this is an OFU go for it!~~

His fanfiction probably consists of long-winded expository whinges that completely ignore the Iceberg Principle and have little to no plot, but really just exist to show how smart he is and how much he knows about everything ever.

No admitted Lust Objects; he's too busy nitpicking everything, and also everyone has cooties. The dulcet tones of all those well-spoken British actors might make him a little bit weak in the knees, though. And, well, Han Solo. You're not human if you don't have a bit of a crush on Han Solo at some point, amirite?

I'm not too familiar with the alien races myself, but if you know of one that would enhance the image, then go for it. {= )

~Neshomeh

How about yes. by Alleb on 2017-08-16 22:54:00 UTC Reply

Hehehe, this is going to be fun. Thank you!

~~I may or may not consider making him a Chiss, maybe~~

-Alleb

Hehe. by Neshomeh on 2017-08-17 16:34:00 UTC Reply

Having now looked them up, Chiss sound cool, though you might have to do something about his name in that case. He would never go with a name inappropriate for his species. OTOH, you could always put it down to the coordinators screwing with him. It would amuse me if both AUs of Nume are blue. {= )

Speaking of, Nume Prime says he wasn't like that as a kid. I say that's because he grew up in a time much less accepting of geeks and he had no friends to be an obnoxious little Trekkie at.

Also, I don't think Cuthaan (or whatever he ends up being called) actually has the full-blown memory thing; Nume's is really sort of sci-fi. Cuthaan probably just likes Sherlock and has a rudimentary mind palace.

~Neshomeh

Ithorian. Deeeeeefinitely an Ithorian. by Scapegrace on 2017-08-12 21:33:00 UTC Reply

Jedi slug men from the outer reaches. =]

An agent seeking a refresher course . . . by doctorlit on 2017-08-12 13:30:00 UTC Reply

Name: Nicholas Buchanan

Age: 49

Race: Will stick with human.

Description: African-American, curly black hair just beginning to turn grey. About six feet. Tends to wear dark suits. Brown eyes.

Lust Object: Far too old to be thinking about that any more.

Notes: So, I'm trying something a little different here. Nicholas is a PPC agent, DIC-Sci Fi/Steampunk Division, unpartnered. I'll be needing him in a future, planned story-line, but don't really know what he's up to at the moment. His motivation for enrolling in this OFU is that: even though he watched the classic trilogy in his youth on World One, and eventually saw the prequels, his mission schedule of frequently being sent with other agent pairs into the field has prevented him from seeing the newer movies, watching through the Clone Wars materials, playing any games, or reading the various comics and novels. Finding that it's beginning to affect his work, and chafing at the fact that he needs to rely on younger colleagues for info on a canon that was part of his own childhood, he finally decided to take advantage of OFU time shenanigans to get fully caught up on Star Wars. The only thing I ask is that you don't get him romantically involved with anyone. Otherwise, I leave him to you!

Unless you don't want to deal with my weirdness, of course. Feel free to disregard this submission if you're not into the idea. :)

—doctorlit, OFUing for the first time

Excellent, another adult! by Alleb on 2017-08-16 22:43:00 UTC Reply

Thank you! I shall definitely make use of him.

-Alleb

Garbage author inbound!!! by Scapegrace on 2017-08-11 19:20:00 UTC Reply

Name: Esclarmonde d'Occitanie

Age: 21

Species: French-Cathar

Description: The daughter of a Cathar Jedi and a temporo-spatially displaced heir to the county of Foix, Esclarmonde has blonde hair down to her mid-back, hazel eyes, and a frankly unfortunate dress sense, in that she favours gowns of a decidedly medieval cut which do not entirely lend themselves to running about doing Jedi-ish things. They don't go with her very pale champagne fur either, but that hasn't stopped her yet. Despite the presence at her side of the technological wonder that is a lightsabre, she has taken vows of humility before the eyes of her father's God, owning very little else save the clothes on her back and the barest minimum she needs to exist. She drills relentlessly in an adulterated version of classical Shien that also pulls techniques from her father's training in High European longsword fencing (something she calls the Way of the Falling Dove), but only when she is not in prayer to God or meditating upon the Force. She eats little, sleeps less, and considers herself utterly dedicated to the life of a Jedi.

If only she knew she was the product of a pun based on an obscure religious sect from medieval Carcassonne.

Lust Object (if applicable): N/A

Light Side/Dark Side: Light side.

Notes: Esclarmonde (do not shorten it) is, despite her professions of piety, an inveterate snob, largely ignoring the plight of the people in order to focus on moral and theological problems as well as continue to master her lightsabre. She is, according to medieval notions of morality, a good and decent person; by our standards, she's a Bible-thumping martinet so far up her own backside she practically walks by somersault.

... So now for the actual submission. by Scapegrace on 2017-08-11 20:07:00 UTC Reply

Name: Tom Booker

Age: 26

Species: Human

Description: A pudgy, speccy little sad-sack with more pimples than friends and very, very clear skin, at least in his words. However, he's not actually that terrible, just overweight and with the unfortunate lack-of-hairstyle common to people for whom hair is just something that gets in the way. Yes, he's overweight and views exercise the same way other people look at a plague bacillus, wears big thick NHS glasses held together mostly with hope, and has a wispy, irritating beard and moustache dyed orange from his crippling addiction to Wotsits, but he's not a bad person. Just a singularly unprepossessing one. He looks like he'd be the sort of person who'd get very into men's rights activism, only he's at least vaguely acquainted with the concept of basic human decency. Tom is generally found in tracksuit bottoms and a Star Wars fandom tee in many shades of mysterious-food-stain-on-black, and writes terrible fanfiction centred on his OC as a means of escape from his job as a from-home data entry schlub.

He's sculpted this OC like Pygmalion did Galataea, drawing on his knowledge of the Star Wars continuum and his History degree to form a wonderful character. One he has, if he's being honest with himself, fallen in love with a bit. Actually, a lot. I mean, she's taken vows of chastity, he's actually a real person, but if they were both around he's sure it could work. So what if the other characters in the fic are drawn in strokes so broad they resemble a twelve-lane Autobahn? She's the important one.

He's commissioned fanart of her as well, standing proud in her medieval attire, lightsabre in hand, champagne-furred ears poking out from a cascade of golden hair. He has that picture above his bed, as a reminder that there's still creativity left in him, and in the world. Tom really does love her...

His Esclarmonde.

Lust Object: Sylvar, Esclarmonde

Light/Dark Side: Light side, obviously.

Okay, let's give this a shot by Mattman The Comet on 2017-08-11 19:14:00 UTC Reply

Name: Charlie Johnson

Age: 20

Species: I mean, I'm pretty sure it's just humans

Description: Brown haired and stocky, mostly due to a history of wrestling and weightlifting. Basically, functional muscles as opposed to aesthetic muscles.

Lust Object (if applicable): Er... what

Light Side/Dark Side: Light, I guess

Notes: He doesn't even write fanfiction, nor is that big of a fan of Star Wars. In fact, the fanfiction attributed to him is actually made by his little sister, he just uploads the stuff.

Pffft, I love this idea. by Alleb on 2017-08-11 19:45:00 UTC Reply

He's not even a fan. He is literally just a normal dude, with only the passing knowledge of Star Wars that everyone has, and he's been dumped into an OFU. This is perfect.

-Alleb

This is so dang appliccable to me. by twistedwindowpane on 2017-08-11 18:26:00 UTC Reply

I'm going to send in the kid I was when I wrote SW badfic. Now the Board gets to learn that I've always been as messed up as I am now! Huzzah!

...actually, I was less messed up back then.

----

Name: Twistey

Age: Around 10 or so

Description: Twistey is really really really into Star Wars, and puts references to it into everything she does, but is not a stickler for canon details. Minecraft comes in a close second. Rather than doing anything with the Star Wars canon, Twistey is oft to write fics that have premises centered around the Force and other Star Wars things existing in real life or in Minecraft, fics that star a self-insert protagonist and sometimes friend-inserts too. Her writing is safe for work and for the brain, but it will just plain not make sense, 100% guaranteed. She has a huge, inexplicable obsession with villains in general, resulting in a kind of "deadly innocence" that prevents her from understanding the real consequences of the dark side and other things. Luckily, she doesn't post her work on the Internet, not having discovered fanfiction sites, or even the term fanfiction, yet.

Lust Object (if applicable): None! However, she does idolize Emperor Palpatine/Darth Sidious as a mentor figure.

Light Side/Dark Side: I don't think even she knows. On one hand, she considers herself to be a follower of the Sith creed (but in reality is even more of a wannabe than Kylo Ren), but on the other hand, the protagonists of her fics were either Jedi or fighting against a "dark side" of something.

Notes: If you want to, you can make "Twizzy logic" a running joke when writing her. It's probably good that you refer to her as "Twizzy" or "Twizz" or some other nickname, in order to distinguish her from the present-day version, which is me. Also, the "deadly innocence" thing is just about fictitious villains. I hadn't learned the worst yet.

------

My brain is kind of fried right now so I'm having trouble thinking of more things to say about little Twizz. Let me know if you have any more questions or suggestions for things to put down.

-Twistey

Oh wait, yeah, by twistedwindowpane on 2017-08-11 18:54:00 UTC Reply

The badfic personas are supposed to be sonas, not the actual writer. Hmm, let me see.

Name: Teyori Visalia

Age: 13

Description: Teyori is a Padawan-turned-Sith-apprentice who is skilled in dark side powers, mostly because she likes using them better than her lightsaber. She is capable of Force lighting from training with her mentor, Darth Sidious, and often plays with it a little in order to take advantage of the appearance-tweaking abilities it supposedly has on herself and her enemies. (No, Twizzy, that's not the conclusion you should be drawing from the incident with The Emperor getting his lightning deflected back at him.) As such, the culmination of all the non-canon lightning is her ghostly pale skin, skeletal-looking face, impressive height, shoulder-length black hair hanging over the left eye, and sunken-in red catlike eyes. Her usual attire is the standard black Sith robes, usually with the hood up, with a black tunic, pants, and boots underneath. She speaks with a slight British accent and suppresses outward signs of her emotions unless in combat, in which the full extent of her rage and maniacal happiness are presented.

Lust object: None.

Light Side/Dark Side: Dark side, but isn't actually likely to actually kill anyone or do any real damage. She just scares people more than anything else.

Notes: None, I think.

---

Question: Am I allowed to add in another character based on an IRL friend of mine as she was during the time I would write these sorts of characters? I don't know if I can get her permission, but I kind of want the two to have some nice long banter sessions.

-Twistey

Actually, you were the right at first. by Alleb on 2017-08-11 19:29:00 UTC Reply

Badficcers are just that--fictional versions of the badficcers we used to be/theoretical badficcers.

Although, if you wanted to have fun with it, you could say Twizzy basically inserted that physical description into the "race" section on her application and thus is, in fact, a wide-eyed ten year old in Teyori's body.

If you don't think your friend will mind, feel free to make a badficcer for them. Banter is always good!

-Alleb

Okay then! Haha! by twistedwindowpane on 2017-08-12 22:35:00 UTC Reply

I guess I'll make a badficcer out of my friend at that age; although she does write questionablequalityfic currently, she'd probably agree that her fics back then weren't as good.

How would the in-universe application be presented? More of "yourself" or more of "yourself as a Star Wars character"? Because if it's a "yourself" thing, she probably would be honest about herself (the only questionable detail being considering herself a follower of the dark side), but if it were a "yourself as a Star Wars character", she'd basically do as you said and insert the descriptions of Teyori into her application. As the race, it would be human in both cases, albeit altered by the dark side in the latter case. So what do you think is closer to how the application would actually work?

Anyway, here's my friend as a badficcer:
Name: Avice (that is neither her name nor her Internet pseudonym, because I'm nice.)

Age: Around 11

Chosen Race: Human

Description: Avice is really really really into high fantasy, and as such, writes Star Wars like it's Dungeons and Dragons. She is guilty of coming up with suspiciously cleric-esque Jedi and new Force abilities that really don't fit the genre of sci-fi. And prophecies, musical numbers with original songs, and Mary Sues. She even invented an entirely new order of Force users! Anyway, this kid is a bit more like typical badficcers than Twizzy is.

Lust Object (if applicable): Unknown, but probably has one.

Light Side/Dark Side: Light side, duh!

Notes: The banter between Twizzy and Avice is not fanfiction-oriented like the banter between present-day Avice and I, but rather more similar to two friends who have different favorite sports teams and have banter about who's the better team. Occasionally they will engage in mock duels.

How Avice Would Create a Sona (just in case we want to combine Teyori with Twizzy):

Name: Shaiata Siraelian

Age: 20

Description: Shaiata is a Jedi Knight of great skill, perhaps surpassing Anakin in her abilities and definitely being one to discover new things the Force can do. Yoda mentored her even though he is deceased at this time, through appearing to her in her dreams (something she later learned to harness and use for communication with other Force users via meditation.) She often receives prophecies in this manner, and is destined to do half a dozen great things that bring balance to the Force yada yada. At one point in time, she had a Padawan named Teyori, who she greatly misses and wishes to guide back to the light side. She has flowing, golden blonde hair, deep blue eyes, and fair skin, and wears the traditional Jedi robe ensemble. Her lightsaber is sapphire blue. This is similar to how Teyori would have looked pre-Sithhood if Avice had had her way with writing her, but Twizzy insisted on giving Teyori a less idealized appearance by basing that appearance on herself.

Lust Object: Secretly, another Jedi.

Notes: Somehow, despite being on opposite sides of the Force, Teyori and Shaiata (like their authors) are still friends. This will probably be how it is for the rest of eternity, as both are too stubborn to listen to the other's attempts to bring them to their side.

---

Let me know if there's anything else you'd want to know!

-Twistey

Oh, dear, I forgot something critical in the form! by Alleb on 2017-08-11 16:25:00 UTC Reply

Please mention what alien race your badficcer would choose, if any.

-Alleb
Badficcer applicant! by Iximaz on 2017-08-11 16:15:00 UTC Reply

Name: Tay-Adi
Age: 16
Description: Male, six feet tall, totally ripped. Totally bad@$$ Light Side Jedi who still sometimes indulges in a little Force Lightning, but only on people who deserve it. He's so very conflicted and Dark, but not evil, yanno?

In reality: he's quite scrawny and timid and couldn't throw a punch without breaking his hand. He's all bark and no bite.

His struggle truly touches the heart. by Alleb on 2017-08-11 16:27:00 UTC Reply

Thank you! Tay-Adi is on the list!

-Alleb

XD by Iximaz on 2017-08-11 16:37:00 UTC Reply

He says you will be spared of his wrath.

(He's also human, btw, forgot to mention. Black hair and gold eyes. Or brown hair and green eyes, if you asked his mommy.)

Are you limiting this to one per person? by Huinesoron on 2017-08-11 15:38:00 UTC Reply

I'd love to craft a badficcer (>:D), but I've also got at least one PPC agent who could use a refresher course (/an excuse to be nosey and go poke around the Secondary Location).

hS

Nope, submit as many as you want! by Alleb on 2017-08-11 15:41:00 UTC Reply

I can't wait to see your created badficcer; this should be fun!

-Alleb

I shall stop at two. by Huinesoron on 2017-08-11 17:20:00 UTC Reply

Name: Tango Dioxide

Age: Exactly as old as Star Wars itself. She'd rather not think about how old that is. (She's 40.)

Description: Human. Redhead - I mean red, not ginger. PPC agent. Her handful of scars aren't from missions, though - they're from spending most of a decade on the run.

Lust Object: Well, she's married (to Steve, he's a bit wet), but... well, she had a bit of a Thing for Luke Skywalker back in the day. (Though he's too young for her now, obviously.)

Alignment: Grey. When she and Blue discovered the Mary-Sue Factory, he spent the next year in jail for trying to speak out; Tango accepted reassignment and kept her mouth shut.

Notes: Tango is applying because her partner, Nyx, lived in the Star Wars 'verse on and off for seven years, and Tango is fed up of being the less knowledgeable one.

Name: Sha-Non Smi'ith

Age: Ten thousand and seventeen. Or just seventeen.

Description: Jediiiii~! kk so Sha-Non was this super talented Jedi trainee ten thousand years ago but then she was FROZEN IN CARBONITE ten thousand years ago and only woken up, like, last week. Or at least that's what she tells anybody; it may just be an excuse to use bad(e) old(e) English(e), or do we mean Basic(e)?

Also she's a dog-girl, which is like a catgirl but for dogs instead. (I believe there are several species of these around Star Wars, but she doesn't know that.)

Lust Object: Rey and Jyn Erso, though there is a distinct possibility that she doesn't realise they're actually different people.

Alignment: Liiiiight~!

Notes: She has a lightsaber. It is pink. That should tell you everything you need to know about her.

I think I got a bit tangled between 'badfic writer' and 'self-insert' there. In reality, her name is Shannon Smith (... yup), and she's a seventeen-year-old dog-loving Canadian who writes prolifically and without reference to anything except her own memories of the films.

hS

Woot, thanks! by Alleb on 2017-08-11 19:48:00 UTC Reply

That'll be very interesting, having an actual adult mixed in with the generally-teenage fanwriters. Also, oh Shannon, never rely on your memories. Ever. Never works well.

Anyway, thanks again! I shall add them to my fanwriter list.

-Alleb

I always meant to ask... by Hardric on 2017-08-11 13:41:00 UTC Reply

But do OFUs also take 'volunteer' students? I mean people who may consider begin writing fanfic, or writing fics good enough already, but want to get better at this? And of course want the oportunity to visit their favorite world.

I mean, why only badficcers would get the chance to go to Minas Tirith, Gallifrey, Hogwarts, an so many other places?

Some do. by Huinesoron on 2017-08-11 15:31:00 UTC Reply

There were at least four PPC agents in OFUDisc's first year, for instance. But they still get gratuitously tortured, naturally.

hS
Hm, I don't see why not. by Alleb on 2017-08-11 13:54:00 UTC Reply

I'm not sure if there's any official rule about it, but the main obstacle would be the fact that fanwriters don't know about the OFUs until they actually receive the invitation to register. I suppose you could explain it as someone who has connections with the PPC voluntarily submitting an application; if you want to make a fanwriter like that, I'd have no objections.

-Alleb

Thanks to both of you for the answer. by Hardric on 2017-08-11 20:32:00 UTC Reply

Guess I'll go for two characters then, volunteer and classic badficcer.

Name: Gerald Richards

Age: 23

Description: Human with brown curly hair, blue eyes, rather tall and slightly skinny. Is also a bit short-sighted, but he doesn't know if glasses exist in Star Wars, so... Generally stays quiet, except if buttons are pushed or excited. Don't exactly draws attention to him. Still has a somehow snarky sense of humor.

Lust Object (if applicable): Not really. Visiting an enjoying this 'verse is a much better way to go.

Light Side/Dark Side: Light Side here, although he want to go for 'greyer' things (consider Jedi should learn to live with emotions, not suppress them, and like the idea of writing pragmatic Siths who could have control over their emotions. Like the eye of a storm.)

Notes: Applied volunteerly after hearing about OFUs from former students. Didn't write a SW fic yet. Is a pretty big fan of Legends continuity, especially the Old Republic time, be it the MMO, Revan or Meetra Surik, and Thrawn. Disdainful about the second animated series of Clone Wars, consider Maul's return after Phantom Menace as 'cheap' and Savage Oppress as a 'yellow clone of Maul created to boost audimat'. Still likes Rebels, and saw all the movies and the first Clone Wars series. Like the idea of learning about lightsabers, with a little weak spot for dual wielding. Did some fencing and canne de combat.

Name: Darth Destructus (Lewis Jenkin).

Age: 15

Description: The most awesome pureblood Sith ever, with black hair and golden eyes, a kickass prothesis replacing his left arm, a total destructive juggernaut of the dark side. (Scrawny brat a little too much enthusiastic with black hair and brown eyes. Acne is still here, ready to come back if stress rises.)

Lust Object (if applicable): Rey and Assajj Ventress are badass. Period.

Light Side/Dark Side: Dark side. clearly the more powerful guys. Except whiny Kylo Ren.

Notes: Did like to write fics with a lot of over-the-top power fantasies as a way to take out frustrations from his life. Did see all the movies, but is far from being at the top of the game about them, and like Clone Wars, the second series. Also an avid player from the MMO the Old Republic. Is pretty much on the side of 'evil is cool and badass'. Generally loud andd obnoxious as a way to exist.

Above are applications. (Sorry, making sure they're seen.) by Hardric on 2017-08-17 14:29:00 UTC Reply

Really sorry if you already saw them Alleb, but I wanted to be sure, since you didn't commented them like you did for all the others.

Eep, sorry, totally forgot to comment! by Alleb on 2017-08-17 20:20:00 UTC Reply

Yep, I saw them, but commenting slipped my mind. Sorry about that, and thank you!

-Alleb