Subject: Good luck. (nm)
Author:
Posted on: 2019-05-18 19:47:00 UTC
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Hi, everyone! by
on 2019-05-17 16:07:00 UTC
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So, if anyone doesn't recognize me, I left about a year ago after having defaced the Board with gross pics, which was mainly related to a) my anger issues and abusive tendencies, and b) misunderstanding the situation re: another user, who I thought was being unfairly bullied by the community. After having interacted with said user for a long time afterwards, it is pretty clear that I heavily misjudged things, unfortunately. Still wish I could have actually helped.
Anyway, I've managed to get those anger/abuse issues in check nowadays - I'm in therapy, and avoiding stress as much as I can; it actually turns out a lot of this came from staying in a specific community which really wasn't healthy for me to involve so much time in. I also miss this community, so I'm... Maybe considering coming back?
Of course, that would entirely rely on a) whether I was actually formally banned back then, which I don't actually know (nothing about it is on the Board, at least), and b) whether I would actually get banned about it now. So... I guess I'll just let you decide on that. -
Oh, just one last thing. by
on 2019-05-18 18:49:00 UTC
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Palin... by
on 2019-05-18 19:37:00 UTC
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I still have no say in whether or not you should be allowed back, and I'm not trying to change that. However, I don't think it's very classy to try to guilt the folks who said no into changing their minds with this post. Especially because, from what I've picked up from this thread, you seem to have done a bit more than say some "silly things".
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Not trying to get anyone to change their minds. by
on 2019-05-18 19:39:00 UTC
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Just sort of trying to explain why I thought I had a chance, which was clearly just silly.
I ended up deleting my writing blog. I'll just, idk, play video games and stuff until I can finally convince someone to help me out. -
Good luck. (nm) by
on 2019-05-18 19:47:00 UTC
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And he doesn't speak for everyone. Nice try. (nm) by
on 2019-05-18 19:02:00 UTC
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Can confirm, I do not speak for everyone by
on 2019-05-18 19:29:00 UTC
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Honestly I more or less missed what happened, but I am definitely willing to let bygones be bygones. Though I doubt I’m particularly qualified to say that about everyone.
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Well, okay then. by
on 2019-05-18 09:02:00 UTC
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I definitely understand, it's a bit disappointing, but it was sort of expected.
I mainly wanted to come back because the PPC is basically the last place I was actually able to get some inspiration and manage to put in effort to write in, which I otherwise haven't been able to do in years. Mental health and trauma issues interact really badly with my attempts at writing or reading nowadays, so I guess I'll just give up on that. Oh well. -
PSA: This is what blatant emotional blackmail looks like. by
on 2019-05-18 16:49:00 UTC
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Just so we're clear, if Palin chooses to give up on writing, that is their choice. We're not making it for them, and we should absolutely not feel guilty about not wanting them around because of it. Working on their issues is up to them, and they are capable of doing it elsewhere.
~Neshomeh -
I'm glad I'm not the only one who noticed that. by
on 2019-05-18 17:53:00 UTC
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I'm not airing my opinion on whether Palindrom should be here, since I haven't been around when the... past events unfolded. But I did raise my eyebrows a little at the tone of that message.
Palindrom, I deeply and sincerely wish for you to find the inspiration to write again.
But come on. -
My vote is a solid no. (nm) by
on 2019-05-17 22:20:00 UTC
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I too don't think it will work out, sorry. by
on 2019-05-17 22:01:00 UTC
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As much as I don't want to bring this up once again, I've had trouble with groups online before for a number of reasons, and I can say right now that serious offenses are not something to take lightly - heck, I've committed such offenses before, and the damage caused was so great that I was disallowed to return to the groups affected on principle. From what I read from Thoth and Ix's replies, a good portion of your previous actions would have warranted an instant banning in groups with different administrative processes compared to the PPC. I wasn't even aware of the Reddit incident until I read this very thread, but it doesn't change how unbelievably hurtful it was to the person targeted, no matter how you feel about it now. I don't know if they're aware of it either, seeing as they gave up on us out of atomic rage over a different situation that shall not be discussed, but it was way over the line on principle and again, I feel it would have gotten you insta-banned if it happened elsewhere. Attempting to deface the Board in a fit of irrational anger only dug you even deeper, too, and in fact I literally thought you were being told by a certain banned user to do so and worried that their influence of other people could still pose a threat even after they themselves were shut out (to be fair I was being irrational myself then, and I apologize to the community at large). Looking at all of this, then, it seems that the community would likely not welcome you back on the grounds of violating the PPC Constitution, though whether or not this warrants dropping the banhammer is for everyone else to decide.
4. The community will not tolerate any form of harassment between members of the PPC, whether it manifests as attacking, bullying, or pestering. Respect people's personal boundaries just as much as you do everything else about them. This rule particularly includes interactions outside of PPC community spaces: harassing someone by email is just as serious as doing so in public, if not more so, and will be treated as such. If you find yourself being harassed or bullied by another PPCer, please make the community aware! We cannot help with a situation if we don’t know it exists.
(From Section One: On Toleration And Its Limits)
Now I'm not in any position to make any big decisions, and I don't think I'll ever be able to do so for this community for multiple reasons. As it stands now, there are undoubtedly so many other communities online which may regard you as a blank slate and thus give you a chance to integrate into them better. However, and I know you may not like to hear this, the PPC isn't one of these because of what it's seen of you before simply can't be denied or forgotten, which is likely the case for any community member anywhere which has committed reprehensible acts against the very group they were a part of (and believe me, I would know... *shudder*). I understand and accept that you are changing for the better - I am too, for that matter - but my guess is that in the eyes of the PPC community, nothing can make up for the things that forced you to leave except simply no longer being a part of it.
Once again, other people and networks may not see you so negatively; I'm still willing to remain mutuals with you on Tumblr, for instance. Sadly, however, I feel like things are very much not in your favor anymore here in particular, and in any case I'm sorry to say that I think you are in the wrong here based on the PPC Constitution alone. -
My opinion. by
on 2019-05-17 17:35:00 UTC
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I don't have authority here. And ultimately I will abide by whatever choice the community makes.
However, were it up to me I would not allow you back. Were it merely some harsh words, that would be another matter, but what you did crossed... so many lines.
I'd like to trust you. I'd like to believe that you've changed. If the more forgiving members want to give you a second chance snd that proves to be the case I will be yhe first to shake your hand and celebrate. But as it stands I don't personally feel that I can vote to allow you back in good conscience. I'm sorry. -
Yeah. Not only that, but: by
on 2019-05-17 18:47:00 UTC
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A while back, while Desdendelle was still in the PPC, you screencapped things he’d said, posted them on Reddit for people to mock, and then when I called you out, you played victim and said it was posted by somebody else under your name.
Bullying PPCers behind their backs combined with defacing the Board like you did doesn’t make me particularly sympathetic to you.