Last week, Odysseus Nemo had the misfortune privilege to come across the original text of Master of the Universe, the Twilight fanfic which eventually evolved into the Fifty Shades Trilogy.

Naturally, the peeps in the Lounge did what they did when faced with this particular type of badfic:

1. Ew.

2. This is wrong. Like very wrong, and here is a detailed explanation why.

3. Spork?

Nemo and I decided to take on that burden.

Here is the MST we worked on, at the cost of our sweat, blood, tears, and sanity. Enjoy.

Warnings: NSFW, because, well, it's proto-Fifty Shades. Also avoid if you don't want to read about abusive situations.