Subject: Re: flashback tie-up story
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Posted on: 2022-06-09 13:16:31 UTC

(Sorry I took so long to read this; my computer is dead and I've been quite busy!)

Oh, my gosh! I'm sorry you had lost interest in completing "Bled Times," but I'm glad you came back to wrap it up. This has been an immensely enjoyable story, both for Christianne and Eledhwen's relationship, and for the multiversal war drama. I love me complex plot that crosses the PPC over with an OFU and another multiverse, while involving time travel and underground resistance! E+C were very cute, watching them slowly get closer to each other over time, although that also made the fight at the end of part three hurt all the more. The repetitiveness of all the solo missions Christianne went through really got across the monotony of her life while Eledhwen was absent. (Excellent and funny usage for your older fics, too!)

The mental block in chat speak form was really clever (and you'd better believe I caught those Cascada lyrics!), and it's interesting that the chat dialogue seemed to be shipping E+C? Was it pulling from Eledhwen's subconscious, or channeling her mirror self's feelings, since m!E was apparently already in love with m!C? Either way, seeing their mirror counterparts was cool and unexpected at the end there, though I feel like I should have seen it coming, especially after the doppelgangers at Mr. Allen's place. (For some reason I assumed they were random Suvians in disguise? Feels pretty dumb in hindsight!) Oh, and Melody and Hannah seem pretty cool too. They have very strong personalities, for how little page time they have; it really makes them feel like whole people who have been active in the background all along!

Some maybe errors?
"Eledhwen sighed, before finally moving aside a box to reveal something that looks suspiciously like dried blood."
"Looked" to match the tense?

"'You keep moving back and forth between two Word Worlds in two multiverses, and they might stop becoming two separate things altogether.'"
I think either "become" or "stop being" are more what you're trying to say here?

"'I felt as though my fae was wandering through the dark, beset in dreams and in waking by Lilith’s cruelty.'"
I don't speak Sindarin, but Eledhwen used the word "fea" in an earlier chapter, and I think that's what got autocorrected here?

—doctorlit very much enjoyed!

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