Subject: Me gusta!
Author:
Posted on: 2022-09-21 17:46:52 UTC
You’ve got Diamond and Zara’s dynamic down to a T! Although I would say Dia doesn’t usually shriek? She’d be more likely to snarl (because Twipire things and them being more like a animals yada yada Scarlett dislikes Twlight). Anyway Mellon is great!
Back in June I asked for cameos for an interlude, and it is starting to come together. Or, well, it’s halfway done, but the cameo bit is at least finished. Thus, I would love some feedback on my use of your agents!
Some got more screentime than others. I also didn’t use every single agent that each Boarder signed up, but every Boarder that did sign up is represented, even if it’s just with one line of dialogue.
The following Agents are in use, with their Boarder in parenthesis:
Mina (Linstar)
Diamond and Zara (Scarlett)
Charlie (OrangeFox)
O’Ryan Keyes (Kittyauthor)
Thoth (Thoth)
Vania (doctorlit)
Peregrin (Tomash)
Phil (Philly)
Liu Siyuan (Lily Winterwood)
Gall, Derik and Gadrik (Neshomeh) are also in use, but they are playing a larger part and I am not done with them yet. XD
The GoogleDoc is right here. Feel free to comment to your heart’s content! I am warning you... It got a bit chaotic and stupid. Hopefully in the best possible way. If there's something you don't feel comfortable commenting in public, you can either poke me on Discord (Ekwy#3289) or send me an email (my address is clickable up top).
/Ekwy, who is done dilly-dallying about whether or not to post this tonight, and decided to just take the plunge
PS. The Whitby Horror, the new installment of the Usual Ten, is almost entirely up now! Tomorrow the penultimate chapter is posted, and all of it will be there by the 19th if you want to catch up.
Other than a minor nitpick or two, you got Thoth pretty spot-on.
You’ve got Diamond and Zara’s dynamic down to a T! Although I would say Dia doesn’t usually shriek? She’d be more likely to snarl (because Twipire things and them being more like a animals yada yada Scarlett dislikes Twlight). Anyway Mellon is great!
Trying to map the gravity in an Escher room is exactly the sort of thing Peregrin would be doing.
As is casually dodging the question of whether he had permission for any of this.
(also, I think you flubbed my author credit)
Changed the proper author credit, real sorry about that. Glad it's looking IC otherwise though!
/Ekwy
I had a little poke at Gall and Gaddie's section. I love it; just tweaked Gall's dialogue a bit. She tends to speak more informally and often irreverently, too. ^_^
~Neshomeh
I will write more with them obviously, but I'm glad I'm on the right track there! And I approve any and all suggestions you make, as always.XD