Subject: Addendum
Author:
Posted on: 2012-07-02 22:58:00 UTC

It's also a bit shoddy, I think, to not have action tags.

Looking at that second excerpt I have an urge to add action tags... probably Alice snaps the book shut before the line about McDonalds' dinners, and there's a rolling of the eyes when she says 'nothing'... oh, and disbelief from Bob pretty much the whole way through, he's definitely surprised that Alice isn't making her choices known right off the bat.

Dammit, now you've got me interested in these two. They were only supposed to be an example...!

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