Subject: Concrit
Author:
Posted on: 2012-03-07 03:00:00 UTC
The bad news: This is not as good as your last mission, or your last interlude
The good news: It isn't bad
So I have to say, I really like the reactions to the trollfic in this. They're funny, and believable, and bear a resemblance to something I like to do in my owns spinoff, so I guess we think kind of the same.
Unfortunately, this suffers from one of the things I mentioned about your last mission to an even greater extent. Namely, I have trouble telling exactly where your agents are. You do an excellent job of describing the environment, but where your agents are in relation to each other and the things around them is unclear. I understand that this is hard to do in a mission with so few (read: one) canon location(s). Still I often had to try to figure out where your agents were purely based on context, and was not always able to. The troll battle, when this was most critical, was hard to follow.
So yeah. In all, not a bad mission, but you have written better.