Have some Bleepka, and your two cents (valid in any thread, except this one).

Have a rhubarb - on fire!

Hi, have some fudge!

Here, have an egg whisk! Useful for dispelling author wraiths and those pesky spambots. Also, it whisks eggs! Use it for good and not evil.

Welcome to the insanity! Enjoy your stay. :-)

Welcome to the Board! Here, have some chocolate, won't you? So, what fandoms are you into!

Well met, rookie! Please enjoy this assortment of various fried foods as a welcoming gift.

Welcome, welcome, may I present you with an assortment of things with points? They include, but are not limited to: Hats, shoes, pikes and cook books.

Welcome, new friend! Help yourself to the bag of venomous invertebrates. Don't worry; they don't bite!

Hello and welcome!

'Ere, 'ave a conical 'at and a muffin!

The 'at is made of tin foil and duct tape, so it keeps the conspiracy theorists out.

The muffin is a zucchini muffin!

I'm not going to make any obvious jokes, because we love new people! :D

Anyway, here have some Bartok for the road: Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPeW7hz9RwE&feature=related

*grabs a comically large net* I shall catch you, Pande! And then, THE ZOO WITH YOU! MWA-HA!

(Welcome aboard, have a muffin! Pinkinepie made it! ^_^)

Pleased to meet you, Pande. Have this bag full of polyhedral random-number generators. They are useful for generating random numbers, and also as emergency projectiles.

I also have a couple links for you.

The first is a link to the FAQ for Newbies

The second is to the Guide to the PPC

Links to the Wiki and the PPC IRC Chat can be found at the top of the Board. Check them out when you get a chance.

Welcome aboard!