Hi! TV tropes, eh? Awesome.

Have a holy hand grenade! (Do not use near rabbits or lagomorphs of any kind)

Hello and welcome! Have this conical hat and some pastries!

The pastries are probably not stale, but I make no promises.

The conical hat is made of duct tape.

Looks like it. So, what's your fandom?

Hi, have some fudge!

Have a crate of Bleepka, as well as your two cents.

Have a... let's see... a miniature violin decorated with pictures of chess pieces! Okay, that was silly, but I tried.

I also found this site through Tv Tropes. Welcome to the board! Here is your complimentary cigar and a can of live bait!

Nice to have you a-board! I found this place through Tv Tropes too. ;D

Oh, and have some chocolate! *Throws chocolate at you*

Welcome, new friend! Have an army of pawns.

Welcome to the Board! Here, have some chocolate, and enjoy your stay!

So, what fandoms are you into?

Because everyone can enjoy a good exploding pie. :D

*pokes the newbie* D'aaawww!

Ahem ...

Welcome! Have a plot hole and a whiskey and cola (or a cola and cola, in case you don't drink).

Welcome! I bestow upon you a stone dragon statuette and a package of red pens.

Sweet! Now we have another functional musician of stringed instruments on the Board! =D

Here, have some Berg for the road:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UrfoyyreUbE

I give you the gift of e-compleation.

Now you are a boarder. Welcome aboard.