Have a large bronze shield (it's curved, so you could probably use it for sledding), a shining star (in case you need to steer any tall ships), a purple rock (because I don't have any blue ones on me), and the wrapper from a Hershey's chocolate bar.

Also have some punctuation.

Hello! Have a pet cat and some punctuation. You look like you need it.

Have some ginger snaps and orange juice! It's just as yummy as cookies and milk.

And may I recommend a browser with a spell check feature? I'm dyslexic myself, and I would probably be afraid to post here without the help of my squiggly red lines. It can't do everything, but it's a start.

(Also, you may want to read what you write as if you were saying it. If you pause, there's probably punctuation that goes there.)

Welcome to the PPC Posting Board, Pluffy!

Others have already commented on the spelling and grammar thing.

Just a question, though. How old are you? Not for creepy reasons, I promise. Just, we like to know who people are around here.

Hey, hey, hey, slow down there, eh? Don't forget your punctuation. Look carefully, this forum is very careful about grammar and punctuation. Taking into account what we do, there's no sense in bringing up or showing up badfics if we can't do better ourselves.

Welcome to the Board! Please deposit your sanity in the provided receptacle. *indicates bucket marked "Warg Fodder"* You shan't need it here.

Welcome, new friend! Have a venomous arthropod.

Here, have some snacks and and water!

Don't feed it Sues or Stus.

As well as use capital letters and punctuation before you show us badfic.

We'd like to understand you before we start getting chucked badfic from you.

Hi, have some fudge!

Fair winds!

Now you can throw BBQ parties!

but I would like to see more punctuation in your future posts.

This is a place where people get together to share their fondness of using English correctly. And laugh or horrify when it is used badly.

That said: Welcome.