Hiya, here's a sonic screwdriver. :P

Welcome to the Board. Please enjoy this Inanimate Spaghetti Rod, just taken out from its can!

Hello and welcome to the board!

Here, have some chocolate, and enjoy your stay!

Here, have this conical hat. It's made from tin foil (to keep the conspiracy theorists out) and duct tape (so it's both waterproof and indestructible)!

Hi! Have some fudge!

Welcome! Have a hat knit from only the softest spun pelts of Cute Animal Friends! Sure to keep you warm in even the coldest soul-crushing badfic!

Fair winds!

Now you can throw BBQ parties!

Don't feed it Sues or Stus.

Have some robes and water, mate.

Have a pet cat, a green rat and a little spat.

Nice to meet you. Have a bag of pebbles and a Random Shiny Object.

I like your fandoms.

*runs off to squee about people actrually reading her stuff, as she gets ridiculously overexcited on hearing about such*

Welcome a-board, and may your Agents stay relatively sane.

Have a roll of duct tape. Ridiculously useful, and [insert deity] knows I have enough of it.

Welcome, new friend!

Have a fox terrier!

Hola, bienvenida mi amigo. (I just finished my Spanish homework.)

Please abandon your sanity--you won't need it here. Have a free bucket for your deposit.

Oh, and here's a peony and a book on the language of flowers. Enjoy.

-Honu_Wahine

Well met, rookie! Please enjoy this silk top hat as a welcoming gift.

Acid toothpaste's here, forms there. Pen only.