I do like it. It's not my genre, but I can't deny it's well-written. You seem to have the hang of something I've never been able to do--the ability to actually tell a story briefly, with all of the words having a purpose, instead of rambling on uselessly. Lucky you! :P Yeah, you deserved the A. I wonder that sometimes because profs will just go, "Oh, it's all spelling/grammar corrected; give it an A," but this one deserved it.

I'm stunned. Simply stunned. Your short story roped me in and held me fast from the very first sentence, and that's a rare thing for a story to do.

Somehow, you manage to give density and raw emotion to a character with only a few lines, instead of burying your readers under tons of irrelevant exposition. You don't tell, you show. And above all, you really made me care about Jason and Emma and Tyler, and feel thoroughly sad about what had happened. You really made me hate Amy. Your characters are people, not just cardboard cut-outs.

All this, to me, is the mark of true literary talent. I loved it. Bravo.

I agree with Nesh about the ending not being vague at all.

Also, I also wish people would learn these lessons. They never seem to, though. Alas.

Now for some talk about the actual work. I like the format that you chose. The differences in tone from the guys to the diary, and even through the diary, were distinct, which is nice. All in all, I think it deserved that A and I would love to see this expanded into a longer piece.

Well done.

-Phobos

The end isn't vague--not if you're paying attention, anyway. Just takes a little story math to put it together, which ought to be allowed.

We weren't allowed to use that sort of thing as a plot device in the first writing class I was in, because the professor thought it was too easy, too cliched... but I don't think there's any other way you could have done it here. It needs that finality to drive home the point. And I think the way you chose for it to happen is good, especially with all the publicity about it. Makes it very plausible.

Now, I'm sure I'm being vague, but that's because I don't want to spoil it for anyone else who might read. Which you should. It's short, and it's good, and I think we've all experienced some degree of feeling shut out when our friends have new relationships (or doing the shutting out, even). It's pretty natural to have a period where there just isn't room for anyone but that new person--but it goes away in time, one way or the other, and it helps if you at least TRY to remember your other friends in the meantime.

~Neshomeh