Subject: And clearly...
Author:
Posted on: 2010-08-12 17:06:00 UTC
Eowyn and Faramir, Galadriel and Celeborn, don't get to have any.
That's not even mentioning all the other couples that aren't in the movies like Bombadil and Goldberry, Beren and Luthien, as well as Melian and Thingol. Because they obviously don't exist if they're not in the movies...
I've added them to the Unclaimed Badfic page, but I thought they could stand to be shared here as well.
Crossing the Line - T rated
-- The second daughter of Galdriel and Celeborn must decide between the one whom she loves and the duty to her people. But then another elf comes into the picture and makes things even harder.
-- Lothlorien is apparently expanding after the War of the Ring, and Haldir is the most awesome elf in Lorien. The Sue has no discernable personality whatsoever, but is somehow the only thing anyone ever talks about. There's one short exchange about Lothlorien, which just serves as a run-up for how great the Sue is. The most important thing in Arwen's life is getting the Sue and Haldir together.
-- One mini: Rumin. I think the suethor thinks it's actually spelled that way.
Love or Duty - M rated (don't know why)
-- Legolas must choose between his love for his best friend or the duty to his kingdom. LegolasOC
-- It's all in bold and the author is badly in need of grammar and formatting lessons. The Sue was found wandering the woods and taken in by Thranduil and is now Legolas' best friend, but everyone else hates her. Frodo and Aragorn give relationship advice at Aragorn's coronation feast and Aragorn goes with Legolas to find the Sue. No-one ever talks or thinks about anything but the Sue. Three really short chapters.
Follow Your Heart - K rated
-- This is my first fanfic, and I wrote this because I wanted someone besides Aragorn to get some love. I didn't really make it as a spin off of LOTR, just kind of borrowed the characters and a few places. Constructive criticism welcome.
-- Elrond is a king, Vilya still works after the destruction of the One, and Arwen stayed in Rivendell to help look after the Sue, Elrond's orphaned niece. The Suethor seems unaware that there's any connection between Aragorn and Rivendell at all.
...that Elrond's nieces and nephews were ''human'', and therefore mortal?
"I wrote this because I wanted someone besides Aragorn to get some love"
Because clearly he doesn't get any in canon. >.>
Lleu
He's either gay with Legolas, the target of a 'Sue, the strawman for a Feminist!Sue, or ignored entirely. The 'Suethor may have a point on this one. She's doing it wrong when it comes to fixing/evening things up/out, but she has a point.
I once trawled through about 400 Sue reports and found that Aragorn was the second most popular choice as a LO, but that was ~85 to Legolas' ~200, and half of those were in fact Legolas.
But it wouldn't surprise me in this case if he was going to be the target of the Sue, since in this version he's not married, so there's that obstacle out of the way.
every classically, obviously amazing pairing that they can get their hands on so they can try to squeeze some of its awesomeness out and paint their name on it.
Eowyn and Faramir, Galadriel and Celeborn, don't get to have any.
That's not even mentioning all the other couples that aren't in the movies like Bombadil and Goldberry, Beren and Luthien, as well as Melian and Thingol. Because they obviously don't exist if they're not in the movies...
But Faramir isn't nearly as smexy as Arry-warry and Leggy-poo, and Celeborn is, like, old
And what do you mean, couples that aren't in the movies? LotR is a movie!
Seriously, though, Galadriel and Celeborn don't get nearly enough love from the fans, and they're a great couple. Everything that was going on in the Second Age, with Celeborn in Eregion... *sigh*. If I was better at romance, I'd write something for them. Just have to keep practicing, I guess.
Lay of Leithian ought to be 'smexy' enough for anyone. Defying death in order to get a jewel that will bring the Feanor brood on your head so you can marry the girl... what has Robert Pattinson ever done that compares to this? Played the piano?
The Lay of Lethian is awesome, and that would unquestionably be my first choice if they were ever to make a film of a Silmarillion story. That might get it the recognition it deserves, if they could do it justice.
I'm now having somewhat happy thoughts of Robert Pattinson playing Curufin, and Sean Bean as Beren strangling him unconscious (even though I know it's not really fair to blame the actor).
Can a man be that despicable? Nah, he doesn't seem to embrace the Fanhards that much. Sean has already been in a LotR, so there goes your fantasy, I'm afraid. Anyway, does Pattinson have the drive to be a Son of Feanor? Probably not the love of all things shiny...
From looking at some of his other films, he does actually seem to be a pretty decent actor cast in a horrible role, and I gather he's genuinely scared of the Twilight Fans (cannot say I blame him).
As for shiny things... come to think of it, I'd have an aversion to sparkles after doing the Twilight Saga.
No Sean Bean as Beren? :'(
Ah well, I guess that would be confusing (though not as confusing as my original fantasy of Viggo Mortensen as Beren, Liv Tyler as Luthien and Hugo Weaving as Thingol). There are other guys who'd probably be just as good in the role. Hugh Jackman, perhaps, without his Wolverine haircut.