We need every able-bodied soldier out there, right NOW! There's a war goin' on, or were you too busy slacking to notice?! There ain't time for basic training. Here's a lasgun, a flak vest, and a standard-issue supply of awesome. Now get out there, grab some cover, and bag me a daemon or two!

HOO-RAH

Hahah, I, Mad Maudlin, am the only M&M here. But that's okay, musicmage4114. Welcome to the Board! Please deposit your sanity in the provided receptacle. *indicates bucket marked "Warg Fodder"* You shan't need it here. Also, here's a slice of sausage.

Have some nicely sharpened pencils. Good for defense or writing. I love TVTropes. That's also how I found the PPC.

*waves exuberantly* Hello MM! You've gotten your fair share of welcomes already (and interesting arsenal items), but I like to jump on the newbie-glomping bandwagon. So...

*looks if Maudlin Hart has been here before her*

*FIRST glomp!*

Now off you trot till your month is up. Here's a spork patch! It's a defective spork patch, as one of the tines looks bent, but it'll do for now. Hope to see a ruthless and entertaining bad slasher out of you!

If you need more things to feed your panic mode, visit the PPC Wiki -- http://ppc.wikia.com/wiki/PPC_Wiki.

Because I don't think anyone has given the traditional Newbie Poke yet.

Very nice to meet you!
- Sedri

I will probably shorten your name. However, it will likely not go beyond “musicmage”. I'm strange that way. Anyway, take a bladed yo-yo.

Hey, I'm new here too!
Hello.
I seem to be starting out kind of lurker-ish. (Maybe 'seem' is an understatement...)
Yes, there is lots of entertaining reading here!

Have some cufflinx! (Not cufflinks, though. The difference is that cufflinx explode occasionally)

Have 199 gil and a Rod of Spell-Check (It grants spell-check +5 and defense +2).

I'll call you Musicmage, probably, come to that. I see we found the PPC the same way.

Video game fanfics? Found any good ones for Final Fantasy XIII, by any chance?

Anyway, have a Bag of Infinite Capacity and a plover, just so Tawaki saying first stops being redundant.

Have a panda that eats, shoots and leaves.

Don't worry, he won't bite.

I forgot to close my url tag, and now clicking anything (including reply and back to messages) sends you off to the sparkly rock. -sigh- Terribly sorry.

--anamia

I offer you a sparkly rock (pickax not included). You may use it as a paperweight or throwing weapon, whichever you choose.

--anamia

p.s. Ooh, a Bad Slasher! Welcome welcome welcome! We need more of them around here.

Fair winds!

Hello! Have a seventeen foot long, multi-colored, wool, knit scarf (curly wig not included), and a bag of jelly babies.

Please use them IRresponsibly!

Oh, TVTropes...that site is just a time-eater, isn't it? But it's great!

I hope you enjoy your time here! And have fun reading! There's enough material to keep you busy for a good while. :)

Welcome to the PPC Posting Board! Here, have some chocolate, and enjoy your stay!

Please enjoy this Phoenix Down as a welcoming gift with my compliments.

Have a green scarf and a slightly bloodstained longsword. Use them wisely.
(And which video games? *is interested*)

Welcome, MM! I give you...a coxcomb! It's a sort of silly hat with Shakespearean lineage.

Chocolate with pink icing.

Oh.. for a fellow TvTropes afficiando...

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/WMG/FriendsAndTheHighCouncil

Prepare your brain for rottage.

Hello from a fellow newbie.

Have a random infodump.

PPC board constitution:
http://ppc.wikia.com/wiki/PPCBoardConstitution
Board FAQ:
http://ppc.wikia.com/wiki/FAQ:TheBoard
Newbie Guide:
http://ppc.wikia.com/wiki/Guidetothe_PPC

As you can see, those also link to the wiki, which is a rather useful resource because most things, eventually, link back to it.