...granted. Conditionally.

Go ahead and write your mission, but I'd like you to send it to me for final approval before you post. I'm going to try to find another oldbie who knows the fandom to help me out with specifics before then. Just remember to watch those typos, don't to write in numerals, and have it thoroughly beta-read by someone reliable.

Also, since I didn't mention it last time - the fic you want to kill looks disgusting, but I'm guessing that you won't have to wait long before being able to charge, so it should be pretty easy for your agents to deal with (as well as give more time in HQ for us to get to know them). Make sure to rate it appropriately - I had no idea of how graphic it would be when I took a look (though thankfully, I'm not at work).

When you've got your mission ready and betaed, send it to me at fanwritersedri@gmail.com, and I'll get back to you as soon as I can.

I've sent you a few PMs through The Pit's private messaging system in regards to some stylistic and proofreading matters regarding your work The Darkest Ocean.

In addition to Sedri's recommendations, universes are typically written as proper nouns within the few places they are described uniquely. World One is such a unique description, and it looks better if it's capitalized anyway. The Star Wars continuum's droids usually have a designator with a hyphen in the middle, and that would be important to make sure ends up in his name every time unless you never use it, or the name is in dialog.

I assume HK-50 is pretty much going to be KotOR's HK-47, sociopathy and extremely efficient violence wrapped in a nice hard case. There's a lot you can do with that, although I'd warn that simply shooting something in the knees from from 120 kilometers with a sniper rifle and a trilight scope might not be imaginative even if it does get the job done. On the other hand, people who want to just shoot em but have to kill in less efficient ways can add to the entertainment.

Is Orang(e)Dream's characterization going to be about overconfidence, or is that just one attribute in one situation that's going to come up?

...a few things. Firstly, your agents look pretty good - I like that OD claims to be immune to squick and isn't, which will make for some funny incidents, and I like that your droid agent will move stiffly when disguided as a non-mechanical race - those are good details to play upon. Not knowing what kind of droid an HK is (my first thought was the Hunter-Killers out of Terminator, but they don't seem to have any sentience I know of), I can't comment much there, but as long as his A.I. is sufficiently 'human' enough, that shouldn't be a problem.

My biggest concern is your writing technicalities. You've used numerals instead of words several times, both here and in your fic ("nearly 12 words", "world 1", "crew of 11"), and there are small glitches which jump out at me as I read (for instance, "He knew that no matter what he did, whether he destroyed four enemy fighters or was unceremoniously shot down himself, that the Marines would arrest the pirates." - the second "that" is superfluous), but those are fairly rare. What bothers me is that it looks like you've spelled your own agent's name wrong - is he meant to be "OrangDream" or "OrangeDream"?

Not knowing the fandom of the fic you want to kill, I can make no comment there, so I'm afraid you'll have to wait for a read Permission Giver's feedback for that. Overall, I think you'll do fine, as long as you watch your use of numerals and keep an eye on the balance of your agents.