Calm down.

Something even more horrifying, if possible... by Honu_Wahine on 2009-12-18 02:00:00 UTC Reply

First off, my sincerest apologies for the last posting...It's what happens at 3AM with caffeine, homework, and a strong desire to strangle the teacher.... I'M REALLY SORRY FOR EVEN SUGGESTING IT!!!!
On another note, I found a story that could win an award for being the most NSFW, NSFB, plain horrifying rupture of canon ever--And it was started by the same author who wrote that one chapter tragedy "Anestel" and the 67+ chapter horror that is "Cuil Eden." It's called the "Interactive Legolas Slash Story." It has over 1500 chapters, at last count, and is the most fabulous example of why fangirls and incompetent hacks should never be allowed near a LotR fanfiction and a computer at the same time.
It could, just by sheer mass and complete replacement of all canon characters/locations/*everything possible,* that it possibly outstrips C*l*br**n.
Are you scared yet? You should be.... My favorite thread, just for the fact that I'm just a *bit* mashochistic with my reading tendencies, is where Legolas gets taken as a...pet-thing...by Glorfindel. And did I mention the piercings and the...creepiness of it all, and the fact that the Elves of Imaldris are really, really into modern day BDSM activities, even going so far as to have a tailor that specializes in gear for it?
Yeah, I threw up too.
Think this could become a legendary badfic, even if it *is* the inbred bastard cousin of every Choose-your-own-adventure story that you ever knew and loved?
Signing off before my head explodes,
--Honu_Wahine(and i really am sorry....)

badfic article by Honu_Wahine on 2009-12-26 02:36:00 UTC Reply

Um, can I start the badfic article on this...series? I've started typing it in Microsoft Word, and was wondering, before I post it and everything if a) I'm allowed to right now(is that a stupid question?) b) how do I create links to other articles, and c) how do I make a warning/spoiler box thingy at the top of each section for the article?
HW(*sits in a corner, biting fingernails and staring warily at pile of homework*)

Answers by Neshomeh on 2009-12-26 03:05:00 UTC Reply

a) Anyone can edit the Wiki, so yes, you're allowed to. However, I'd also point out that it isn't necessary to make an article for every badfic, no matter how horrendous. There will always be more, and the Wiki is for PPC stuff, not badfic. So, badfics should either be related to missions or particularly notorious. Also, make sure you follow the formatting of the Wiki.

b) Links to other articles are formed like this: [[Name of Article]] or this: [[Name of Article|text]]

b.1) External links go like this: [URL.tag] or this: [URL.tag Text]

c) I think the spoiler warning tag is: {{spoiler}} I'd check that by looking at the Wiki markup for pages with the warning on it. You do that by clicking "edit this page" or whatever it says.

~Neshomeh

Re: Answers by Honu_Wahine on 2009-12-26 03:24:00 UTC Reply

Trust me. This is *worse* than C*l*br**n. Read at least three chapters into the "It is the voice of a Noldo" fic line, and you will, in all likelihood, take a running jump out the nearest window in an attempt to get rid of all the body horror and....pr0n that appears. Poor Elladan and Elrohir...Poor Legolas... My heart weeps for canon. *"Going Home" begins to play in the background.* Trust me. It's that horrible. It NEEDS the article--there are at least 1500 missions, without going into the storylines, for agents. But, if the chapters are broken down by line, there's only 600 missions of horrendous, brain-searing, mind melting horror to endure. Some of it attempts to revert back to canon, and then someone like Esteliel, Gabby(i?) or talics pops up and the story goes to hell again.
*begins beating head against the wall, and reaches for her older sister's bottle of tylenol and a large hammer.* Excuse me while I go purge my mind.
Honu_Wahine

Oh dear... by OpinionedAngel on 2009-12-21 15:08:00 UTC Reply

Sounds horrific. Does anyone else but me think this one should REALLY be killed? With fire even? Heck, make that //LOTS// of fire!
Calm down. by Sedri on 2009-12-18 03:53:00 UTC Reply

You asked a question, you were given an answer; no one's holding it against you. Believe me, we actually have to say that sort of thing a lot. Actually, the only thing you've done that might tick people off, as far as I can see, is the excessive use of exclamation marks and CAPS LOCK SYNDROME. So please don't grovel; there's no need to sound like a badfic writer ;p

That said, yes, it sounds horrible. I don't think I even want to touch it, let alone read it. I'll leave the PPCing of that to more experienced agents, myself, but for those who do want to see it, how about a link?

Okay, it's official, everyone's crazy by Honu_Wahine on 2009-12-18 11:24:00 UTC Reply

Okay. I'll calm down. But I'm normally that crazy--I used to be one of the badfic authors(I keep one of them on my ff.net account*shudders*)
Okay. The Link. *neon sign that says "Links of Doom" pops up* For the first one -- http://esteliel.de/cgi-bin/1/story.pl?next=1&chapter=0 -- That brings you to the first chapter, and completely avoids the attempt to rationalize destroying Tolkien's canon with this story. Did I mention that they won't delete chapters, and that their are multiple oppotunities on some threads to write a PPC mission for this...?
*There's another one.* It could be even worse than the first one. http://www.esteliel.de/cgi-bin/3/story.pl?next=1&chapter=0 It's a War of the Ring interactive...horror, shall we say? The link is for the first chapter, and the results of it can be just as horrifying. There are, at last count thankfully only 316 chapters of brainmelting horror--although some of them are pretty good with the coherency and an attempt for plots...
If you like Denethor or Thranduil, or pretty much any of the canon characters, don't read unless you've got an entire case of Bleepka to yourself.
--The horror-
Honu_Wahine

Re: Okay, it's official, everyone's crazy by orangedream13 on 2009-12-18 20:20:00 UTC Reply

Nice find. Hope this goes on the legendary badfic article