Finally, I can hand this stuff off.

'm not allowed to drink it anymore, not after the Hot Fuzz incident. But I didn't want to waste it, ya know?

Welcome!

Nice to see new faces around here. Lovely to meet you. Here, have a bag of pebbles and a Random Shiny Object. Useful for throwing at Sues and staring at, respectively (although throwing the Shiny at a Sue might distract her, come to think of it).

And, as below, possibly the only one you'll get. *ceremonially pokes*

Welcome!

I checked out that list... until I got side-tracked by the "Jekyll's Children" series. GAG. I mean, the LXG version of Dr. Jekyll suffers from serious Adaptation Decay, but really. Is that writer serious? I almost want to PPC it, but I don't know if I could stay sane. O.o

~Neshomeh, a fan of original!Jekyll and stage!Jekyll. But that's about it.

Have an egg whisk! It's shiny, gold-plated, and hey, it whisks eggs! It's also pretty useful for getting rid of author wraiths and those pesky spambots. Use it for good and not much evil.

Welcome to the insanity! Enjoy the ride.

Have a Trandsimensional Pocket Knife. If you find a use for it, do let me know - I have too many.

Cheers,
- Sedri

Have a softnose laser. They kill, so don't worry about the bit charrie Sues. Hee.

Help yourself to a venomous arthropod!

Have a shrunken head.

Try not to spend it all in one place.

Welcome to the PPC! Here's a scimitar from the Raven Armory and a jug of bleepka. Hopefully I won't have to run into any of those fics soon. *shudders* I'm most definitely not going after the Twilight ones. I hate that fandom, so why protect it?

*takes off helmet*
Damn, those S-IVs almost got me that time.
Oh, a new guy!
Here, you get first prizes from the loot! For you, an M12 Light Grenade Launcher!
Might I advise you use it for blowing walls and doors in, only? It'd kill a Sue way too fast.

*shudders*

Fortunately, some of them has been PPCed already.

Welcome to the Board. Please deposit your sanity in the provide receptacle. *indicates bucket marked "Warg Fodder"* You shan't need it here. Also, here are some coconuts. You know how many.
-Mad Maudlin

Fire's too good for it. Anyway, here's a Lightsaber for your troubles, as a recruitment gift.