That's. Um.

MISSION PLUG! The punishment begins. by Chliever on 2009-06-28 02:52:00 UTC Reply

Winston and Chliever both screwed up in their first mission together. This was not just coincidence; I've wanted to do this storyline from the beginning. Thanks to Trojie for the inspiration; I think she was the first to do a punishment storyline.

http://agent-chliever.livejournal.com/3082.html#cutid1

In this mission, Chliever and Winston are called on their flubs, and sentenced to deal with the entire collected works of Starjeffry, an infamous LiveJournal horny teenager and/or failed troll. With his Plaguesword gone, look for Chliever beginning to use his diseases as his main weapons. Also, what's worse than an escaped canon in your RC? Your superior mistaking her for an Intern! And what's Andreas doing with that vial of Nightmare Fuel, anyway?

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*chokes* by Tiroth on 2009-07-03 01:57:00 UTC Reply

I probably shouldn't be so surprised or horrified, but...you've got a GREAT UNCLEAN ONE as an Agent? O.O

Sorry, I just...wow.
Thank you all for your kind concrit. by Chliever on 2009-06-28 14:39:00 UTC Reply

Warning added. The Hyacinth's lines italicized. And you're right, I do need a beta, but I'm not exactly sure how to get one. I generally proofread these things, but I guess some bits can slip through the cracks.

As to attacking LJ-based fic, Pottersues sporked this guy, so I thought it was safe for me to do so, as well.

On beta-readers. by Neshomeh on 2009-06-28 17:08:00 UTC Reply

Around here, you pretty much just have to ask. Usually someone will volunteer. If not, it tends to be because no one knows the continuum or is scared of the badfic.

And, yeah. I like to think I'm pretty good at catching my own mistakes, but nobody can get them all--unless you want to wait a month or so, so you have time to forget what should be there so you can see what is there.

~Neshomeh

Re: On beta-readers. by Chliever on 2009-06-28 22:07:00 UTC Reply

Thank you for all your advice. And, hey, we all write our clunkers on occasion, right?

And no, I'm not keeping the canon.

To add to what the others have said... by kgarrett on 2009-06-28 13:52:00 UTC Reply

I'm sorry, but I really don't think the Hyacinth's incompetent enough to mistake a canon character for an intern. Also doubt she'd let them stay in HQ past whatever reason they're there for (usually Medical or a FicPsych stay).

Good point. by Neshomeh on 2009-06-28 17:15:00 UTC Reply

I'm willing to suppose that Medical and FicPsych are busy, and maybe sometimes somebody slips away. I also understand the agents being too panicked to tell anybody about it. But kgarrett is right about the Hyacinth. It might be better to have her not know about the situation at all until it resolves itself.

Also, you do know you can't keep Eponine indefinitely, right?

~Neshomeh

Of course. by Chliever on 2009-06-28 21:55:00 UTC Reply

Believe me, I only brought her in so the Wrath could come down on my Agents' heads.

Re: MISSION PLUG! The punishment begins. by Vixenmage on 2009-06-28 07:54:00 UTC Reply

I don't even know how to say this.

First off, I don't think we should be attacking things posted on people's personal journals. I remember this topic coming up a long time ago, when someone brought up a community started by badfic authors on LJ which wouldn't allow anyone non-approved in. Someone (I want to say Huinesoron, but I'm not sure) pointed out this was what people were supposed to do: put their stuff on private communities, unless they wanted it reviewed. Yes, his stuff sucks, but it's not on The Pit, or any communities that I can see, so why bother? His fics are an abomination, yes, but what he does on his Livejournal is his business.

Secondly, a warning would be nice.

Thirdly... Um, did you have a beta for this? It's generally Strongly Recommended. Anyway, yeah.

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Okay, opinion time? by JulyFlame on 2009-06-28 07:47:00 UTC Reply

The total lack of warning is so not on at all.

Missions?

Are generally clean for the most part, or have some sort of warning.

Also? A Beta? Get one.

To be honest, I didn't like this at all for the above reasons and some of what Neshomeh herself pointed out.

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That's. Um. by Neshomeh on 2009-06-28 07:00:00 UTC Reply

... A warning about the M-rated nature of these things would probably be a good idea in the future.

I've seen some crude rude stuff before, but I think the comparison of the "trail of tears" takes the cake. *gags*

A few technical details. First of all, the Plants speak telepathically, which is usually rendered in italics, not quotation marks. Second, you left the N out of Hyacinth a few times, as well as a few other miscellaneous spelling and punctuation oopses. Third, did you really mean for the CAD to say "Watch out for hundred-food [censored]"? And, if so, why didn't that appear on the charge list? O.o;

I am both curious and afraid to find out what the next missions hold in store for Winston and Chliever.

~Neshomeh, who half expects to see them and Eponine in FicPsych before long.

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