Oops...

Subject: Oops...
Author: thejadefalcon
Posted on: 2009-06-04 10:43:00 UTC

Chell (http://granades.com/images/2007/Oct/portal-chell.jpg), the silent female protaganist from a puzzle game known as Portal (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Portal(videogame)).

GLaDOS (http://www.gamecola.net/7-1/ive5.gif), an insane, homocidical, sarcastic, vicious AI in charge of the building Chell is trapped in.

Okay, while I was searching for pictures, I encountered a few, what looked like soft porn, pictures of the two. Do I still need to write the fic?

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Hello! :) by Macie on 2009-06-02 09:14:00 UTC Reply

Hi all! Ever since my roommate introduced me to the original PPC missions, I've been a huge fan! As a *ahem* former sue writer myself...*sheepish look* I think this is such a great idea. Haha, maybe one of these days I can atone for my sins by doing some Sue slaying of my own :-P

At any rate, I just wanted to say hello!

Several days late. by WikiMaster on 2009-06-08 13:30:00 UTC Reply

Have some Anti-Lustin!
hello by jabbuk d'eldrin on 2009-06-04 23:56:00 UTC Reply

Have some C4. it makes a nice fire, if you don't stomp on it. and watch out for large glass jars.
Hello! by Cinnia Aine on 2009-06-04 02:47:00 UTC Reply

Sorry about my belated welcome, but welcome to the PPC! Here's a nice shield, courtesy of the Raven Armory!
Hi! by tabbycat on 2009-06-03 12:44:00 UTC Reply

Nice to meet you :D
Hello! *proffers plate of lembas* (nm) by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-03 00:49:00 UTC Reply
Ah a fellow reformee! by PitViperOfDoom on 2009-06-03 00:16:00 UTC Reply

I was a bit of a Suethor once upon a time... luckily the PPC never found my fics back then.

Welcome, welcome! I gift you with a weighted companion cube (it will never threaten to stab you) and a crate of Molotov cocktails!
Hey there! by Sara on 2009-06-02 22:50:00 UTC Reply

Have an egg whisk! It's shiny, gold-plated, and whisks not only eggs, but author wraiths and spambots, too! Use it for good and not evil.

Welcome to the insanity! Enjoy your stay. ^_^
First plover! by Tawaki on 2009-06-02 21:21:00 UTC Reply

BTW, will your Agents be based in a TARDIS or a Response Center?
herro! by Maudlin Hart on 2009-06-02 19:13:00 UTC Reply

Welcome to the PPC! Please deposit your sanity in the provided receptacle. *holds out bucket marked "Warg Fodder"* We don't tend to have much use for things like that here. Also, have a hug and a Nova Grenade. It will be useful. Trust me on this.
-Mad Maudlin
Well, hi! by Cassie Cameron-Young on 2009-06-02 17:43:00 UTC Reply

Hey, loads of us are former Suethors, so don't feel ashamed for that.

Maybe you can even slay your own Sues - I know a couple of people who've been doing that.

As a welcome gift, here, take this bag of pebbles and a Random Shiny Object. Hope you have fun here!
Greetings! by Tirya_Moonflame on 2009-06-02 17:26:00 UTC Reply

Have a winged kitten, and watch out for giant glass jars.
Welcome! by Buta no Kaabii on 2009-06-02 16:47:00 UTC Reply

Have a chainsword which is strangely accepting of upgrades. It even comes with a ranged weapon slot and a feature on the teeth that allows for easy upgrade attachment.
Greetings from the Federation... by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-02 14:53:00 UTC Reply

Here, have a phaser. You'll need it.

And don't worry. I'm pretty sure that everyone on this site was once a Suethor. The important thing is that we recognised this fact.

I'm pretty much the exception... by Buta no Kaabii on 2009-06-02 16:42:00 UTC Reply

Never written publicly viewable fanfic or OCs. In fact, I've barely written fic. Not a writer-type, because names and good plotbunnies both elude me. I do know how to spot badfic, however, so not a total loss. Might develop writing skills later, and just deal with my inevitable Sue-making being a bit more recent. 'Deal with' meaning knife/improve the character if it comes up.

Re: Your lack of plot bunnies... by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-03 10:29:00 UTC Reply

Oh, God, take mine! Take mine! I have literally thousands of the gorramn things and hundreds that hang on!

Err... No, not now. by Buta no Kaabii on 2009-06-03 10:49:00 UTC Reply

Wouldn't be able to use any of them, really. If there isn't any problem with character naming for OCs or original fic, there's a problem with actually writing the story. At this point, I can't really say I can write worth a damn. That's why I never bothered with Agents or Permission. Might consider trying to not suck at making fic, but not at the moment. When I get over the massive can't-think-of-character-names block, maybe.

Re: Err... No, not now. by Pads on 2009-06-03 23:32:00 UTC Reply

I feel your pain. I can never think of names. My first agent's name comes from the Shoebox Project. My second, Stevius, was a bugger to name - we decided we wanted a faun, and it took hours of debating details of backstory and trying to come up with vaguely Ancient-Greek-y names before we said "to hell with it" and settled on a name and a backstory that fitted.

As for in all other writings, I just ask Trojie for the names. Saves hassle, and means there's always someone to blame.

and it's only fair, because I blame you for any mad ideas (nm) by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-04 21:33:00 UTC Reply

Here, take names too... by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-03 10:54:00 UTC Reply

The name bunny is nibbling on my left ear.

Normal names: Megan Redfield, Alan Helm
Standard fantasy name : Reltma Khan, Mala Tanzal
Standard sci-fi names: Ri'klo Drashna, Luth Tarn

There you go. Nick my name bunny. I have too many names for a Half-Life 2 fanfic. I'm trying to name the main character to be a long name that's still fitting, but has a fitting nickname do, while also being British in a future humans-are-slaves-to-aliens environment.

Re: Greetings from the Federation... by Pads on 2009-06-02 14:56:00 UTC Reply

Except those of us who were badslashthors, of course.

Generalisations, they're such fun. :P

Oh, shush you... by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-02 14:58:00 UTC Reply

Given that I want to be in the DBS, should I write a bad slash fic first? :P

it's not compulsory by Pads on 2009-06-02 15:06:00 UTC Reply

After all, I never did.

That's good... by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-02 15:12:00 UTC Reply

Because I wouldn't even know where to begin. Are there any believable pairings in Potter? I've seen Ginny/Hermione, Ginny/Luna, Hermione/Luna, Fleur/Tonks and Ginny/Tonks lately. Any of those okay?

Re: That's good... by Pads on 2009-06-02 15:15:00 UTC Reply

I expect Harry, Ron, Bill and Remus would complain. Not to mention Molly - she seems a little old-fashioned, I dread to think what she'd make of her youngest getting about so much.

I didn't mean all in one fic! :D by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-02 15:20:00 UTC Reply

But are the pairings themselves plausible, regardless of the reactions of everyone else?

On this subject, what about Harry/Fleur or Harry/Tonks? Seen those lately too.

what happened to stretching yourself to the limit? by Pads on 2009-06-02 15:30:00 UTC Reply

Any pairing's plausible if done well. You just have to discount an awful lot of canon.

Harry/Fleur not so much - he wasn't very taken with her in GoF, was he? Mind you, I'm not sure he'd been through puberty at that point. And unless it's set quite a way in the future, I can't see Tonks going for someone as young as Harry.

What she means is - all pairings are a *challenge* by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-03 00:51:00 UTC Reply

Really, Rule 34's just there to spur us all on ...

TROJIE!!!! by Ansela on 2009-06-03 01:08:00 UTC Reply

You've seen what happens when someone gets me thinking about weird and random pairings. You trying to get me to write another one like the last?

Yes? Is this a problem? by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-03 01:14:00 UTC Reply

You are speaking to one of the authors of the shameless Seamus/Dumbledore insanity ...

If that isn't Rule 34 in action, I don't know what is by Ansela on 2009-06-03 01:22:00 UTC Reply

And I want to write some normal pairings for a change, damnit. Not ones that most people have never even thought about.

There's no fun in that! by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-03 01:24:00 UTC Reply

Boldly go where no slashthor has gone before!

Damnit... by Ansela on 2009-06-03 01:48:00 UTC Reply

between you and KG I'm getting very tempted to write something... in the morning, when I can actually make sense.

*curses Rule 34* by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-03 10:43:00 UTC Reply

I still can't find any Chell/GLaDOS things for the Portal fandom. That means I have to write one now, doesn't it?

it doesn't mean you *have* to, but ... by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-04 04:55:00 UTC Reply

... you totally should. (not that I know the canon or the characters or in fact anything about what you're talking about).

You've got to *embrace* Rule 34 or it'll end up biting you in the arse, really ...

- Trojie (if you can't beat 'em, join 'em! Unless 'em = badficcers...)

Oops... by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-04 10:43:00 UTC Reply

Chell (http://granades.com/images/2007/Oct/portal-chell.jpg), the silent female protaganist from a puzzle game known as Portal (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Portal(videogame)).

GLaDOS (http://www.gamecola.net/7-1/ive5.gif), an insane, homocidical, sarcastic, vicious AI in charge of the building Chell is trapped in.

Okay, while I was searching for pictures, I encountered a few, what looked like soft porn, pictures of the two. Do I still need to write the fic?

The question is, do you still *want* to write the fic? by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-04 10:43:00 UTC Reply

If yes, then yes! If no, then no :)

It's not that I don't want to write it... by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-04 10:48:00 UTC Reply

because it'd be interesting if nothing else. It's that I don't even know where to begin. :(

*poke poke poke* by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-04 10:48:00 UTC Reply

Put it in the back of your mind, I'm sure you'll simmer away and come up with something eventually :D

The only ideas I've come up with for it... by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-04 10:52:00 UTC Reply

belong to the realm of tentacle sex. I'm pretty sure I'll hate myself and you guys will hate me for writing that.

Tentacle-sex is *probably* not the way forward ... by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-04 10:54:00 UTC Reply

... although it could be crack!

(always looking on the bright side, that's me).

I refuse to believe that there's any genre of anything that's automatically bad. Prove me right. Write a good tentacle-sex fic :P

Fine. by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-04 11:00:00 UTC Reply

*drafts Trojie in to help*

Awesome, my two favouritest ficcing hobbies ... by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-04 11:01:00 UTC Reply

... cowriting, and turning bad ideas into readable fic.

Oh dear... by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-04 11:09:00 UTC Reply

I was expecting it'd drive you away... hmm... *sighs* I've jumped into the deep end now, haven't I?

It'll be interesting to co-write something. I've never done it before. Considered it, but never gone through with it.

To be honest, not knowing the continuum... by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-04 11:11:00 UTC Reply

... might make it tricky.

If you ever want to do something in a fandom I know, though, I'm so onboard. About two-thirds of what I write is cowritten - it's a hell of a lot of fun :D

I got that impression from my conversations with Pads... by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-04 11:15:00 UTC Reply

The trouble is, I'm a slow writer. Very slow. So I'd probably just annoy my co-writer to fury. Besides, knowing my luck, if we teamed up on something, our ideas about where any possible plot would go would be violently different.

Well .... by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-04 11:17:00 UTC Reply

... I've actually got one cowrite on the book that's three years in the making, so slow doesn't bother me all that much (I normally have far too much on the go at any one time for slowness in one project to irk me).

And as to varying ideas ... I'm a go-with-the-flow kinda girl, but admittedly it can be tricky balancing ideas.

*shrug* Well, if you ever do get the urge to cowrite something, gimme a bell :D

How many things do you have on the go? by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-04 11:21:00 UTC Reply

Because I have about three hundred and fifty stories to write (at last count, which was about six months ago).

If I can think of anything you might be interested in, I'll ask. Doubt I will though.

Um *counts* by The Trojanhorseshadowfax@gmail.com on 2009-06-04 11:29:00 UTC Reply

Well I still have to finish the latest episode of the Good Omens Official Fanfiction Summer School.

Then there's the latest episode of PseudoBagEnders that Pads and I are working on.

And, uh,

Four Narnia fics,

One Star Trek XI fic,

Four Bad Slash missions,

One Angst mission,

One Bad Het mission,

One Floaters mission cowrite with Anjilly

and a bunch of original stuff for a prompts community.

Oh, and four fanvids, a couple of pieces of art, and two podfics. And the Movie stuff.

So, yeah... by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-04 11:36:00 UTC Reply

I have far more to do. *headdesk*

Lucky you :P (nm) by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-04 21:29:00 UTC Reply

Please say that was sarcasm... (nm) by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-06 10:37:00 UTC Reply

Mostly! (nm) by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-06 10:39:00 UTC Reply

What do you mean "mostly"? (nm) by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-06 10:41:00 UTC Reply

Well .... by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-06 22:10:00 UTC Reply

... while having a lot of things to work on can be a pain, can you imagine how much it would suck to have *nothing* to work on? :P

I'd welcome it at the moment... (nm) by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-08 10:48:00 UTC Reply

Re: Um *counts* by Pads on 2009-06-04 11:31:00 UTC Reply

And Seamus/Dumbledore. And the Book of Clive.

What's the Star Trek one, Trojieface, and is it a present for me?

It's that ... by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-04 11:32:00 UTC Reply

... weird videogame-male-bonding thing Inept talked me into.

Although I'm getting urges to write some Kirk/Bones, which you should, like, totally prompt me for.

But tomorrow, because I"m about to go to bed now.

Re: It's that ... by Pads on 2009-06-04 11:57:00 UTC Reply

I can prompt you for it, but it doesn't count as a present. Write me some weird kinky messed up Kirk/Spock as a present for doing work?

...

Okay, I'm actually requesting stuff with odd kinks and dubious kinks. Ansela has infected me.

I can probably do that by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-04 21:29:00 UTC Reply

and I'll send you an email linking you to the STXI kinkmeme in the meanwhile, if you like :)

Re: I can probably do that by Pads on 2009-06-04 22:40:00 UTC Reply

How exactly is the Star Trek XI kinkmeme going to help me write an essay about the criminal underworld of the Restoration?

In other words, go for it.

... inspiration can be found in the most unlikely of places? (nm by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-04 22:42:00 UTC Reply

Re: It's that ... by Ansela on 2009-06-04 16:56:00 UTC Reply

You make it sound like I should be quarantined for reasons of public health and safety :P

Nah, you're a great example by The Trojanhorse on 2009-06-04 21:42:00 UTC Reply

of why 'kink' and several other genres of fic should never be taken to be all bad. Because you write them WELL.
Re: It's that ... by Pads on 2009-06-04 19:04:00 UTC Reply

Oh, I don't think you pose a major health risk, don't worry. I'd just advise keeping small children away from the inner workings of your mind. :P

Re: It's that ... by Ansela on 2009-06-04 19:17:00 UTC Reply

Dear not, no small child will ever be allowed anywhere near the inner workings of my mind.

They should probably stay away from yours as well, come to think of it.

I don't always write smut anyway. :P

Re: It's that ... by Pads on 2009-06-04 20:02:00 UTC Reply

Unfortunately, I haven't yet had time to look at your supposedly smut-free fic, so that last remains just a rumour.

I'll have you know my mind is a most educational and informative place!

Re: It's that ... by Ansela on 2009-06-04 20:16:00 UTC Reply

*snort* I'll take your word for that. I'm usually too busy falling off my chair to notice the educational value of your mind's output.

Actually, on second thoughts... by thejadefalcon on 2009-06-02 15:34:00 UTC Reply

there is that one Ginny/everyone ever even mentioned in the Canon fic. *shudders*

"Mind you, I'm not sure he'd been through puberty at that point."

*chuckles* So if he goes through puberty, he'll think differently?

"And unless it's set quite a way in the future, I can't see Tonks going for someone as young as Harry."

I did once draft a post-OotP Harry/Tonks parody romance oneshot, but that somehow turned into a serious twenty-million chapter fic, which has since remained on hold. But that's commented on in the serious thing that she'd be breaking "at least six laws and get fired twice over."

Welcome. Here's a tall ship. (nm) by khajidu on 2009-06-02 11:39:00 UTC Reply
Hello! Welcome! by Sedri on 2009-06-02 11:09:00 UTC Reply

Have some Convenient Cake. :)

I see you've already been given The Links, so I won't fuss about that. And you're not alone m'love - quite a few of us, myself included, have furiously-crushed Sue-skeletons in our closet. It's what gives us the right to tell other people they're wrong. :D

Welcome!
Hiya~ by Ansela on 2009-06-02 10:33:00 UTC Reply

I comes bearing links. *drags out Big Bag O' Links and digs through it*

First off is the link to the Wiki, a veritable fount of information for a newbie to read through. Especially helpful for you if you want to write missions would be the page on Permission (note the capital P).

I would advise against reading any Legendary Badfic, unless you are of strong mind and stomach. Even the summaries have been known to give those of weaker constitution nightmares.

For your reading pleasure, not knowing what you have already managed to find, I have several links for you. The Original Series (not to be confused with Star Trek) is a good place to start, as the PPC did many aeons ago. ~~What do you mean I'm exaggerating?~~ The Department of Geographical Aberrations is another interesting place to visit, if you have the time and inclination. Also by hS is the Tangled Webs site, which contains backstory for the PPC as an organisation. If you would rather visit the Floaters, then July's site is the place you need to be. And last, but most definitely not least, Response Centre 45 is where Trojie and Pads' missions are archived.

Hope you enjoy your stay here. Please deposit your sanity into the container offered to you by another Boarder; you won't be needing it here.