Ellen rampaged through

Subject: Ellen rampaged through
Author: Gabriel
Posted on: 2009-04-04 05:44:00 UTC

Ellen rampaged through the cafeteria like a whirlwind, having spontaneously switched into Jack Bauer mode with deadly effect. With a stool she smashed the ribs of a Stu and singled him out for interrogation.

"FEDERAL AGENT!" she yelled at his terrified face. "WHERE IS THE BOMB?" She grabbed his thumb and snapped it like a twig.

"Arrrgh! There's no bomb, I swear!"

"THEN WHERE IS YOUR LEADER? WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME!" She snapped another finger.

As always, the Jack Bauer Interrogation Technique provided an instant answer, as well as gratuitous plot exposition:
"Gaaah! He... he's probably trying to get to the Department of Dead Author Electricity Generation! The plan was to incinerate their bodies. This way we not only destroy the canon-makers, but we also paralyze the PPC headquarters."

"How many are you?" asked Ellen grimly.

Before the Stu could answer, a pirate Sue shot him with a pistol, killing him instantly. "DAMMIT!" snarled Ellen.

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EPC Battle Continued by Chase on 2009-04-04 01:10:00 UTC Reply

Just post here whenever you're ready.

Is this done, then? by PitViperOfDoom on 2009-04-08 00:55:00 UTC Reply

'Cause nobody's posted.

Yeah, pretty sure we've decided to stop. (nm) by kgarrett on 2009-04-10 00:05:00 UTC Reply

erm... why? by Sedri on 2009-04-04 07:18:00 UTC Reply

Is something wrong with the old thread? I've never seen any RP continued like this, paticularly with the rules about double posting.

It was getting too long by PitViperOfDoom on 2009-04-04 07:36:00 UTC Reply

And stretching the webpage.

Too long? by Ansela on 2009-04-04 08:52:00 UTC Reply

Trust me, there have been longer ones than that before.

My Apologies. by Chase on 2009-04-04 09:35:00 UTC Reply

We can wrap it up, right guys?

So are continuing it here or in the main topic? (nm) by Anonymous on 2009-04-04 19:42:00 UTC Reply

You might as well continue it here by Sedri on 2009-04-04 23:51:00 UTC Reply

now that there is a new post, but please don't make secondary RP posts again. Not on this board - I suppose there's no harm doing it on the other, but you'd have to get a general consensus.
Uf, do I need to repost AGAIN? by Ariellabellas on 2009-04-04 22:34:00 UTC Reply

That would be the third time. Whew....

Er, that came out more bratty than I intended. (nm) by Ariellabellas on 2009-04-04 22:44:00 UTC Reply

And, wellÂ… by wingnut on 2009-04-04 07:27:00 UTC Reply

There's the other board, if it really needs moving…

After "to your left". by Ugolino on 2009-04-04 03:18:00 UTC Reply

Alex saw the lightsaber fly through the air and jerked to the right in an attempt to catch it, throwing the wolf off balance in the process. Hand reaching out, Alex lifted his arm as the lightsaber began to fall down, his fingers curved as he prepared to hit the activation button...

And promptly felt the hilt hit him between the eyes hard enough to make his world turn black for a moment. The handle dropped to the ground with a clatter.

"Sorry!" Chase called, then was forced to turn back to her opponent as he nearly took her head off with his sword. All the nearby Agents were similarly occupied, so there would be no help for Alex from that quarter.

The wolf Sue had gotten back to her paws by this point and snarled viciously as she jumped at Alex. The PCCer, who had just gotten his fingers around the saber hilt, was thrown off his feet.

The saber handle slipped from his grasp once again, only inches out of his reach. Reaching for it with his left hand, Alex tried to the wolf's jaws shut and away from his neck with the other. He wasn't having much luck. The wolf's claws tore holes in his jacket and jeans and left bloody gashes in his chest and legs as it struggled to break free of the death-grip Alex was exerting on its jaw. Alex struggled to twist to the left, and the wolf took advantage of that to jerk its jaw free of Alex's grip.

It lunged for the Agents neck at the same time he got a grip on the curved saber handle and swung it above him. The Wolf! Sue impaled its head onto the lightsaber, shrieking as the energy blade burned through its lower jaw and skull before emerging through its left eyesocket.

The howl stopped, and the Sue collapsed onto the Agent. Panting and exhausted, Alex tried to move, only to be stopped by the corpse's sheer bulk. Absently, he noted that the body was just the right size to be made into a very nice rug.

Fortunately and unfortunately for the trapped Agent, the combatants of both sides were too busy killing each other to notice him. Fortunately because it meant a Sue wouldn't come over to finish him off. Unfortunately because help would not be forthcoming. Two minutes later, Alex finally worked up the strength to push the body off and pull himself up. Wincing with each movement and the pain it brought from his various injuries, the Agent got back to his feet.

Deuce came to his senses with a start. by PitViperOfDoom on 2009-04-04 04:03:00 UTC Reply

Oh, gods, he thought. How much did I miss?

A distinct humming reached his ears, and he looked up to see his partner standing over him, swinging her lightsaber at any Suevian who came to close.

Deuce sat bolt upright, wincing at the pain in his shoulder. His blue eyes quickly took in the full extent of the fight. "I see we have a nice little skirmish in here," he remarked. "Where's my dagger?"

Adder disemboweled an EPC elf before turning to her partner. Grasping his arm, she helped her partner to his feet and handed him both daggers. "Thanks, by the way," she said. "You saved my ass maybe like, three times. Something like that."

"Judging by the severity of the fight at the moment," Deuce responded matter-of-factly, "I'd say it was more than paid for. So thank you, Adder."

Gritting his teeth against the pain in his wounded shoulder, Deuce swung a dagger and slashed the throat of an attacking anthro weasel Stu.

Fed up with the unexplainable noise... by Ariellabellas on 2009-04-04 04:28:00 UTC Reply

B&b poked her head out from the RC, where she had been patiently waiting for her new partner to show up so she could finally get the ropes of the PPC. Lime-green painted nails dug into the Generic walls as some girl (presumably an agent) launched past her and onto an unidentified, way too pretty female...thing. Presumably a Sue or agent gone crazy, B&b concluded and quietly stepped out into the hall, shutting the door behind her with an unheard click, lost among the chaos of noise and yells.

She leaned up against the door, crossing her arms and ankles casually, watching the mayhem with an expression similar to a bored woman forced to watch a horse race. "What's going on?" She asked whoever was near her, currently fighting something that looked like a weasel, though she couldn't see all too clearly.

Ellen rampaged through by Gabriel on 2009-04-04 05:44:00 UTC Reply

Ellen rampaged through the cafeteria like a whirlwind, having spontaneously switched into Jack Bauer mode with deadly effect. With a stool she smashed the ribs of a Stu and singled him out for interrogation.

"FEDERAL AGENT!" she yelled at his terrified face. "WHERE IS THE BOMB?" She grabbed his thumb and snapped it like a twig.

"Arrrgh! There's no bomb, I swear!"

"THEN WHERE IS YOUR LEADER? WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME!" She snapped another finger.

As always, the Jack Bauer Interrogation Technique provided an instant answer, as well as gratuitous plot exposition:
"Gaaah! He... he's probably trying to get to the Department of Dead Author Electricity Generation! The plan was to incinerate their bodies. This way we not only destroy the canon-makers, but we also paralyze the PPC headquarters."

"How many are you?" asked Ellen grimly.

Before the Stu could answer, a pirate Sue shot him with a pistol, killing him instantly. "DAMMIT!" snarled Ellen.

Adder had turned off her lightsaber by PitViperOfDoom on 2009-04-04 07:36:00 UTC Reply

in favor of her cricket bat, and managed to beat a Redwall fox-Sue to a bloody, brain-leaking death.

With that finished, Adder whipped around just in time to bloody another Suevian's head into a pulp, and witness Ellen's difficulties. "HEY! CAP'N CRUNCH!" she taunted the pirate, advancing.

The Sue flourished a cutlass. "Back, I say, foul agent!" she cried, swinging it in a sideways arc toward the PPC agent's head.

The lightsaber hummed back to life and sliced the sad metal blade like, well, a lightsaber through metal. Enraged, the Sue raised her pistol. With a force she did not know she possessed, Adder swung her 'saber again. The pistol was sent flying. The pirate's gun hand was sent flying in another direction.

Adder pulled out her reed knife and raised it, her braces-studded Cheshire smile practically glowing in the lighting.

"At last, my arm is complete again."

Most of the remaining Enforcers by Gabriel on 2009-04-05 16:25:00 UTC Reply

Most of the remaining Enforcers were either surrendering (haha!) or fleeing, except for a few particularly stubborn ones who fought on against all odds. The floor of the cafeteria, slick with blood, was littered with the dead and the dying. The janitor would be even angrier than the day of the so-called "Food Fight to End All Food Fights" (but that's another story).

"Follow me!" barked Agent Ellen, still in Jack Bauer mode, to anyone who would listen. "To the Department of Dead Author Electricity Generation! We're running out of time, dammit!"

The android grabbed a semi-automatic pistol lying on the floor and strode towards the exit, grumbling against the absence of a chopper to take her to her destination. Cal stumbled behind her, his bullet wound still hurting like hell. There was no arguing with Jack Bauer.

(Since the fun seems to be gone, let's get this over with quickly.)

(agreed) by PitViperOfDoom on 2009-04-05 17:58:00 UTC Reply

"C'mon, Adder!" Deuce raced after the android and her injured partner, and heavy footsteps behind him told him that Adder had finished off the pirate and was following.

Suddenly, his partner broke into song at the top of her voice.

"One dream in all of us still shining,
One star, the everlasting light,
So alone, so lost inside, to the end in paradise,
United, victorious, the sound of our nation tonight."

Deuce joined in, hoping the distraction would get them to the DoDAEG as soon as possible.

"In the dark December morning light,
Fall strong to the burning winds, the fires of Hell will forsake me,
Shattering the chains that ever bind us,
Suffering their pain eternally."

EPC agents were in hot pursuit; Adder swung her lightsaber at anyone who managed to catch up.

"Four strong, smash the silence, carry on like before,
Fires burn, still we battle, lost so far away,
Storm with hell fire raging, sun shines down as they kneel,
Lost in times and long forgotten, gathering miles away.
Tears fall inside the dream, our last days gone by,
Still alive we feel the pain tonight,
Stars fall through blackened clouds, in dreams sadness reigns,
A twilight star in the thousand lights for me."

Adder was nearly knocked over by a hulking EPC wookiee; its sword sliced her arm. Still singing, Deuce flung his dagger accurately. The wookiee fell with a gurgle, pierced through the throat by the dagger. Adder kindly retrieved the knife for him.

"And still we save a breath for the world,
Life brings up for us all,
United, victorious, the hearts of our nation tonight."

They had arrived. Ellen kicked the door open and opened fire at the EPC agents who had gotten their first. Adder burst through the door, just in time to block a blaster shot.

The agent froze, yelling with pride, "Hey, I blocked it!" and was immediately shot in the other arm. "DAMMIT!"

Cal, hobbling as rapidly as he could, finished off an EPC ferret with his katana.

Deuce, on the other hand, went straight for the bomb. Kneeling beside it, he grabbed a pair of wire cutters. Adder knelt beside him.

"Adder," Deuce murmured. "Do you have any idea how much it would cost to rebuild this facility?

"Deuce," Adder murmured back. "Do you have any idea what you're doing?"

Deuce gritted his teeth. "None at all," he replied, and cut a wire.