Good to meet you. *offers a towel*

Hello hello hello! Welcome, and have a graduated cylinder! *tosses cylinder*

*gifts you with Deadly Doses: A Writer's Guide to Poisons by Serita Deborah Stevens & Anne Klarner* Enjoy!

~Zoe, off to find her own copy of the book~

Here, have a Greatsword.

Have a Prinny suit. It increases stats and makes people say "-dood" at the end of every sentence. It makes them explode when thrown, but that usually isn't much of a problem. It may or may not come with complimentary Prinny bombs and a pair of swords.

-Very slightly less new newbie

Another PPCer in my age group, I say "Yay" and partake in much rejoicing! Welcome, friend! Have a pair of dice.

I gift thee with an egg whisk! It's shiny, gold-plated, and whisks not only eggs but spambots and author wraiths, too! Use it for good and not evil.

Oh, and the Warhammer 'fic is that way. *points up and to the left* ;-)

Good to meet a new face!

May I direct your attention to the PPC Wiki, if you have not already located that fine resource. Editors are always welcome. *drops an anvil marked 'HINT' on Zotz's head*

It is always advisable to read The Original Series (not connected to Star Trek) if you haven't already. In fact, I believe that hS insists on it these days. Well, he very strongly requests it anyway.

Beware of the Legendary Badfic. Even the summaries have been known to scar minds, so click on any links to those most foul of perils at your own risk.

Welcome, leave your sanity at the door (such a useless thing is not needed here) and join the fun.

Many, many welcomes. *presents you with a bag of pebbles and a Random Shiny Object*

Someone should be along shortly to present you with the recommended links, most likely JulyFlame.

Welcome, brother PPCer.

(Wow, we're getting a lot more male PPCers recently. I reckon the Board's got nearly double the number of males it had when I joined, though maths isn't my strong point.)

BTW, will your agents be based in a TARDIS or a Response Center?

Have a Long-Handled Cheese Stomper and some flame-roasted Suenicorn! I would give you man-flesh, but it's too nummy. Bleah.

Here's a vibrospork, and welcome to the PPC!