I'm short on virtual cash to give, so accept this humble, virtual shaft of bamboo which found me on my way to the city. It glomps the head quite roughly, so be careful. And don't saw it; you won't find any babies in there.

So I'm a few days late. ^^; But still, welcome, welcome!

I see we share fandoms in both Pokemon and Zelda! :D So I would like to present you with a little planter full of bitter herbs and a crate of milk from the exotic Lon Lon Ranch to get you started here!

Hi there, and welcome to the Board! We're glad to have you!
Please have this one (1) Fluffy Wambler. It's native to the Dwarf Fortress continuum, but ridiculously adorable anywhere.
See you around the Board!

Hello and welcome to the PPC!
Yay, a fellow Pokemon fan!

Hmmm, what to give...

*looks through fandom list; sees "Avatar"*

Aha!

(SFX: running, car speeding away, silence for about 10 minutes, car speeding back, car alarm chirping, more running)

*panting* Here...you...go...
*opens Poke Ball*
Meet Avatar the Hitmonchan, packing Vacuum Wave, Hidden Power Water, Bulldoze, and Fire Punch. (I know, I know, Vacuum Wave is a Fighting-type attack, but Hitmonchan does not know any Flying-type moves!)

*gives Poke Ball* Welcome to the PPC!

Welcome. As the now-second-newest recruit, I pass you the torch. Keep it lit and keep it safe, and pass it onto the next newbie just as I am doing now to you. :)

I also pass you a Universal Key Fob or a Snot-Shot 2000...your choice! :3

Welcome, welcome, welcome! Have a big, fluffy, urple pillow. It's fun to throw it at things!
(All these new people, I'm not feeling very new anymore! What's it been, two months since I showed up?)

*checks your fandoms list*

Ah, Harry Potter and Sherlock! Fun. Since I give newbies gifts related to fandoms we share, I gift you with a cobalt-blue deerstalker. Wear it well.

Hello there! Another Zelda fan, I see! In that case, take a Gust Jar! It's great for putting out the fires after your comrades get flamethrower-crazy from a badfic overdose! Failing that, you could always use it to shoot an octorok at them. Getting hit with a large cephalopod would make just about anyone rethink their recent actions!

Here some rock-hard muffins! (you can't eat it but you can throw it)

Greetings, new friend! Have a Sacred Sword!

Welcome to the Board! Have some of my world-famous hydrophobic water to commemorate the event. Now approved as a cure for zerg infestation!

Ooh, Pokémon fan. Have an Eevee! With a little luck, it might evolve into Sylveon one of these days...

Have a cookie! Have ten!

Welcome to the Board! I'm KittyNoodles, and as a welcome gift I have placed one box of bleepnerds and an Odd Container in your inventory! Enjoy!


Odd Container
Item Level 1
Chance on Opening: Receive one spray of confetti or one huggle - your choice.
[This container is perfectly spherical and appears to have been crafted from glite-painted wood. Its weight changes at odd intervals, and you can't shake the feeling that opening it may proof hazardous to your health if you are unwary.]

...Ignore that last part, the flavor text hates me...

Welcome to the PPC! We love newbies here, so make yourself at home!

As a welcome gift, I'll even give you some music by one Pierre Boulez: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7JIAVneYYoM

Hello! Welcome to the board!
(digs around bag) Well, I completely forgot this was in here! Would you like some Bleeprin frozen yogurt? It will also magically take on your favorite flavor once you get it!

We're excited to get to know you, too. Here, have some Bleep'n'ms (Bleeprin and m'n'ms, good against badfic) and an Unspecified Plushie, which transforms into your favorite character! By the way, what are your fandoms?

Have a gift from teh Specs:

A Redundant Attack pendant!

Slows you to attack enemies while attacking enemies, however that works.