Subject: As everyone knows...
Author:
Posted on: 2014-03-13 17:47:00 UTC
...the real thieves and villains hang around in Baron Huinesoron's Northern and Southern tax-havens. Seriously. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.
-Baron Phobos
Once, many years ago, there a travelling warrior. She hailed from the farthest west and southeast shores, where the Emperor of Fanvik-Neht had no power and was barely known. This was the land of Teiemeffae, a small kingdom where the threat of Marizu was rare, and many of its people were avid followers of the Scientific Theatre of Three Thousand Mysteries. This was not enough for the girl, for she was but a girl at the time- she did not wish to reside peacefully within Teiemeffae's walled borders, but desired to ride forth and strike down the Marizu herself. The girl's elders- many vaunted former knights who once rode out in the name of the Saint themselves- warned her that it was not so simple, that she was, perhaps, too young. She should wait, and instead continue learning from their archives.
Eventually, she traveled forth, ignoring their warnings and leaving Teiemeffae, for its golden era was long past even in her youth, with but a journal and pen in sack and staff in hand, and made her way east, and north, for there she had heard tales of the Marizu's power, and thought herself capable of taking them on.
After some time, she reached the borders of Fanvik-Neht. There she heard word of the Knights of Harpwire, recently driven away from Fanvik-Neht. She found the tales encouraging, and did not heed that two experienced knights found themselves at a loss faced against the alliance of Xing. The girl attacked, and fell easily. The warnings of the elders held true after all- it was not simple, and she was too young. She found herself easily fought off and ignored, and she left to tend to her injuries and wounded pride, leaving through Fanvik-Neht's southern borders, and skirting the Marizu League's lands.
She traveled well and long until she found herself someplace south of Somath-Aful- first the growing kingdom of Cockerelgnash, where she found herself falling in with a group of young lads who were willing fighters with little direction beyond the art of mah-shin-nema which entertained the peoples there, and once she learned their ways and found little else to challenge her there, she traveled to the artistic Keen lands, a southerly domain where each lord's domain varied wildly in how the laws were upheld, where she fell in with the Deegan band, a group of lawless outlanders who were willing to bloody each other in their occasionally cruel fights for dominance, and occasionally ventured into the dangerous outlaw lands of Bie, which bordered Somath-Aful.
And yet, she still remembered her original goal, the purpose which led her to leave Teiemmefae in the first place, and found herself at a loss- was her quest still a good one? Was she worthy to continue on to it, after her years of near-outlawry and wildness? She decided to seek her answer at home, but found no answers- Teiemeffae's gates were closed, its walls shored up against all potential invaders and no one in sight.
It was an answer in and of itself. Home was gone, the warrior could only travel forward.
From there she made her way forward, learning the art of the sword in the Nova Imperium, which bordered Are-Pea; the citizens of the Imperium were often torn as to whether they should join Are-Pea, but in her time there they were actively against it, often fighting skirmishes in the borders.
Again she made her way to Fanvik-Neht, and this time she was able to stand her ground against marauders; now she was wiser and older, and could truly call herself a warrior. She traveled northward to the wastes, tracing to the best of her ability the route the knights of Harpwire took, though for a time she was lost, and ended up in El-Jhey.
From there, she finally set sail with intent to reach Konti-Nyuum, and upon reaching the island she promptly wrecked against the reefs and southern cliffs that helped stave away Marizu invasions. Rather than waste the time she perceived it would take to travel to an open port, instead she began the process of climbing upwards.
By the time she finally made it to the top, she was fully acquainted with the cliffs of Konti-Nyuum.
The Larninkurv Mountains were a far easier feat to travel after the cliffs, and it was there she became enchanted with Wechi, swearing to return there in the future. The next time, however, would be with better supplies than only a length of rope, a sack, a stave, and a sword. (The journal and pen were still with her, and came in use, but were only helpful in penning down information for the future.)
From there, she eventually made her way to Borrd, and immediately bade for permission to join in protection of Plort as a knight. To the surprise of none but herself, as a stranger to the land, she was told to wait, and prove herself first.
With that, she immediately returned to Wechi, where she helped with the process of settling it, bringing law and a vague understanding of the way of roads and how to not make sinking boats with her.
With time, word of her actions soon spread, and she was joined by Neshomeh, who aided her. Between the two, Wechi soon began to flourish.
And yet, the young warrior grew restless, even as she worked; she came here to fight the Marizu, instead she was building in the wilderness. Her sword was not being put to use; her staff only somewhat more. Her skills grew and developed, and eventually she could navigate the Rhedlenc Mire and the Blulenc River with ease in a coracle made by her own hand. Wechi’s waters and mountains were now hers to command.
Finally, she departed, bidding her companion goodbye for now, and undertook the pilgrimage to become a knight and full protector of Plot. She succeeded, and returned as a knight.
Her first campaigns she undertook alone, but she found she favored company, going to battle alongside the knight Trojie (who with time became one of Plort’s barons), among others.
The young knight’s time in Wechi had inspired a new ambition in her: no longer was battle her only desire, destroying the ranks of Marizu as she had longed to do for years, but so was creation; Wechi became her home, a roofless that she had made her own, but there were other forgotten places that called to her as well.
She had arrived after Chaett’s union with Plort, but aspired to hopes to a new, similar place, where the citizens of Konti-Nyuum could gather and easily share knowledge and commerce between themselves. With it, she began her attempts to bring about Iric.
It quickly became a barely hidden disaster.
Iric attracted the worst of the worst, soon becoming a penal colony of sorts. The lowlives and criminals who weren’t tolerated in Borrd, whom the knight was asked to keep in Iric, and away from the more civil lands of Plort soon gathered in Iric, and there was little she could do to stop them. Jacks who tried to prey on women, and Orangemen who spouted virulent hatred against others of all stripe and vaunted their own superiority; in a land of women knights, should they not take advantage?
Unsure of authority, the knight let it pass, until it went too far.
With it, she struck the Jacks down, and the Orangemen, driving them from Iric. By then it was too late, and her actions struck a discord. Iric had grown used to anarchy, and had a form of disobedience borne through their blood, because the Constitution of Plort had no reach here.
Iric, and its immigrants from Tivit soon became the source of the knight’s downfall.
Whispers of her cruelty and a thirst for power began to spread, fully indoctrinating new arrivals to Iri...il nearly all there believed them, and absconded to meet in secret, carefully selecting those who would stand against the knight.
These rumors eroded at the knight, driving her to madness and desperation as others ignored her requests for help; her brashness and occasional heavy-handedness were the reason, they said, and with time they would become allies, if she allowed them the chance.
In the end, she retreated from Iric during the rebellion, setting fire to Castle Flayme in the process.
Things did not improve, and the knight despaired, even as she received the honor of becoming a baron. Everything she had done in the past amounted to nothing, now.
Before long, she found herself pressed fully out from all sides- she received no aid from others, and her ability to do anything repeatedly limited by cries that she was infected by madness, a secret traitor to the Marizu League, a iron despot.
Eventually, she traveled to Borrd, from which she announced her departure for good, appointing a successor, and left to the sea.
Time passed, and the wanderer- she could no longer call herself a knight, or even a warrior- traveled once more. She returned to the Nova Imperium, and then to a recently formed land- Dedubya, which took up much of El-Jhey’s former territory, and even bisected into Are-Pea’s.
She did not forget, even as she built anew, leaving the Marizu menace to others to deal with. Her sword she kept sheathed.
And yet, she could not help looking seawards, towards the island that had for a significant amount of time had been her home...
A new calling found her, and with only a short time left to prepare before she left, the warrior found herself reminiscing. Should she return? Was it worth it? Or was she truly an ill-made knight, one who should never have been in the first place? Her younger days had been spent in near-to-outright outlawry, it was true, but she had put those behind her when she travelled to Konti-Nyuum. Looking back, she could only wonder if her actions were disguised by her own perceptions at the time. What if she had been in the wrong?
Only going back could answer her questions, she decided, after seeking advice.
The wanderer gathered her things, sword, stave, and journal, and then returned to the shore, where she put her shipbuilding skills to use, and made her way back.
This time she avoided the reefs, and the cliffs, instead heading to Borrd.
There, she made her way to one of the many gathering place, finally back again.
It is here that this tale ends for now, dear reader, now that I am here once more…
____
To the surprise of a few who were around back then, no doubt, hi again.
I’ve been gone for quite a long while, but I decided I might as well return to my old stomping grounds for at least a short while before I disappear from the internet entirely for awhile; in about forty days I’m leaving for the Navy, you see. Quite some time to disappear from the internet entirely, after that!
Most of you are new faces, so I hope you’ll forgive me the lengthiness; I couldn’t resist using the framework hS set up there and putting it to use, since, I hope you understand, what with being here, I have a weakness for stories.
-July
July's story kinda caused me to write something for the Protectorate of Plort, too, though I fear it is nowhere near as good as her story... but whatever. Here it is:
Once upon a time, in the distant land of Tivit, lived a foreign monk. First raised in the island nation of West-north, he quietly practised the martial art of Arpying — whose practitioners assumed the visage of others — in the monastery of Agog. Yet he yearned for something more.
Hearing rumours about the Protectorate of Plort and its fabled knights, one day he simply left the monastery. The great wars have moved elsewhere, and the Great Incident and Storm of Fury were things of the future; for a while peace reigned in the land of Tivit, and his journey was peaceful.
He arrived at Borrd on a clear night when the stars shone brightly and the Sirocco was blowing. For a while he settled there, but he did not find the satisfaction he sought, so he packed his belongings again and moved to Iric.
However, it was a time of unrest. Whispered conversations in the inns of La Wunj accused the reigning baron of cruelty, of greedy ambition. At first he did not believe the rumours, for he was naturally trusting. Soon, though, he clashed with the baron. It was not a matter of great import; a disagreement concerning a metaphysical statement, no more, but to the monk it seemed like the whole world hinged on the answer.
For a while he seethed quietly, but a time came when he could stand it no longer. Rejecting the revolutionaries that now plagued the region as the dangerous men they were, he instead went into exile, leaving Konty-nyuum for the island kingdom of Ydyff, where he fought in their wars for a time.
But the desire that drove him to seek Plort in the first place was still strong in his heart, so after a while he returned. The ship that brought him back was small but well-maintained, a parting gift from his commanding officer; he arrived at Borrd once again when the Sirocco was blowing and the stars were bright. Making his way through the streets, he quickly left the city.
Living for a time in the wildernesses of Baron Huinesoron’s domain, he chanced one day upon a queer sight. A knight was hard at work at a forge, whose fire was provided by a young woman. He approached them, and they soon became friends, bringing him to their abode in a hidden vale not far from where he encountered them.
For a while he was content to learn, working with the knight, who dubbed himself the Fast Seneschal, at his forge and with the woman — Karrin the Blue — at her library; but tragedy struck after but a short while. One day the monk returned to the library only to find Karrin tearing her hair out in agony, for she has seen a vision of a great Marizu leader raising an army for an attack on their abode. As the smith-knight was absent, they stowed away on a ship bound toward the Marizu lands.
Their battle with the Marizu leader, Nova, was long and hard; fortunately they had secured the help of a wandering knight, else they would have surely perished. At the end they triumphed, and, weary and wounded, they made their way back home.
Ever since then the monk is quietly toiling at the secret abode, practicing the dual arts of Beytah and Arpying with his friends. From time to time he ventures forth to slay the Marizu, and once every few months Ydyff’s king requests his services yet again, but for the most part he quietly sits in his library, learning.
A veritable blast from the past!
Great to see you back, however temporarily, and best of luck with your ongoing Navy career. My brothers in the (Australian) navy, so have more than a passing interest in matters nautical.
Elcalion
Haaa. The main reason for going Navy at this point is tradition; I'll be third generation. Both my parents US navy and both my paternal grandparents Royal Navy.
....and yet I'm in a desert. Go figure!
Welcome Back, July! \o/ to an infinite degree!
How've you been?
Took the year off from school, am looking for a job, working on my radio project, and eating a bagel right now.
Hello there Mr. Shoe!
-Cuddles Mister Shoebo the mini-Boarder-
My phone hath spawned a mini-me! Egads!
As a pretty-much total newbie, I've no idea who you are. But I loved your post anyway.
And there's nothing wrong with being a newbie- but by this point, I have to say, you're not the newest of the new! (See the latest newbie, for example.)
The best way to become much less of a total newbie is just throw yourself out there; be active! Not only will that help you know who everyone else is, but us too.
After all, as you've seen, very few here actually bite!
I'm glad you enjoyed the post, I wrote it with the intent to be entertaining.
Glad to see you back!
...God I suddenly feel old now; you've got to be in college at this point, right?
Hi from Wellesley College. :D
Oh my god you were practically a baby when you first joined.
Also, whoa, Wellesley, very nicely done, very nicely done indeed.
Are you enjoying that New England weather? :P
I was in eighth grade when I joined. Heck, I think I was barely thirteen, too. Sometimes I look back and cringe at what I've done.
Thank you! Coming from California, the weather here has been... interesting. A couple days ago we had lovely weather, and then on Thursday it snowed again. It's like getting slapped in the face by winter. Elsa needs a hug.
If you can't look back and cringe at what you've done in the past as a writer, you've not made much progress in terms of self-awareness as to what you can improve. And that said, even when you first joined up, your writing was still pretty great. Practice is practice is practice is practice, after all.
Yeeeaaah, can't say I envy you the cold when it's a lovely 70F out here, but that's a great area to be in. When, y'know, it's not attempting to freeze you to bits.
You flatter. I didn't have as strong a grasp of my Agents as I do now. However, I do agree. No one gets better at something without practising it. And experience does lend itself to more realistic characters and situations.
It's very lovely. Wellesley was landscaped by Frederick Law Olmsted. It's one of the prettiest campuses I've ever seen.
Yes, well, you rarely ever do when you start off, after all, no matter how old you are or how much experience you have. It takes time to flesh characters out, and that's something you do by writing them. You can't say you haven't noticed it with all the others you write, after all.
No doubt; I legged it up to Boston and Cambridge last summer, but I didn't make it out that far, just stuck around mainly in that area. Gorgeous area in general, really.
I decided I might as well take it to the max as far as writing that out went; else it'd just be a waste of white space, and there's so much to put to use!
Because this year's Shipfest was about the length of three or more standard "long threads" rolled into one the last time I checked. This is about... (squints) one and a third as of the time of this posting, by my rough approximation.
You should write a book about it! Without the Internet puns, of course ;) (And if you haven't done so already, could you please provide a handy guide to your terms? I get some of the puns, but things like Bie and Tivit...not so much.)
is in the style of Huinesoron's AU reimagining the community as a medieval AU. Many of the terms should be self-explanatory (Tivit is TVTropes), and some are explained in the midst of that massive thread. Have fun reading!
Nice to see you again! It's always nice to see a familiar face come 'round again.
Truly, this is the time of the returnbies. AW is back, VM poked her head in a few weeks ago (I think), and various others have rejoined the fold.
--Obligatory reference to your profession--
Well, I do have a tendency to try and return to my old stomping grounds given the opportunity and ending my self-imposed exile before I really vanish off the internet for awhile seemed like a good idea.
Surprising indeed. (I was back then? I was back then.)
That said... immigrants from Tivit sounds awfully familiar to me. I hope I became less... irritating than I was back then.
I fair tend towards surprises when I can manage them.
Self-awareness goes a long way with that, I've heard.
I guess getting a few slaps on the face from reality thanks to the army don't hurt, either.
Also: that story was good. Really good.
The military has a way of doing that, I hear. Still in, or have you finished your service?
And thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Hm.
-Looks at the calendar-
I'm a little less than halfway through. To be honest, the 'things I didn't think I'll end up doing in the military' list is growing longer all the time; I've the luck to be stationed in one of the most unique and teaching posts around.
That's fun, at least, yeah? I'm looking at six years in, at least for the initial go. And then after that we'll see about becoming a careerist...
Well, I've certainly learned a lot and met a lot of nice people. Sometimes my job is fun. Sometimes it involves lots of ceiling-staring. Sometimes it involves your heart dropping to your boots and you hoping you don't get court-martialed (almost happened to me twice, wasn't fun to say the least).
Bah, I'm rambling. As one soldier to another I wish you good luck in your endeavour.
Sailor, not soldier, what with getting the ships and all. :P
And yeah, no kiddin', but it sounds like you're getting a lot out of it, at least.
Army service isn't for anybody, but those that can stomach it can learn a lot from it. Even if it's an imbecilic army like the Israeli one. (Yes, it's 90% incompetent. Thankfully the competent people staff the important places.)
(PS: Sailors are a sort of soldier from my PoV; this comes from the IDF being such a small army.)
Let joy be unconfined, for July has returned! Cue the confetti and fireworks! Roll out the barrels! Do other celebratory things!
In all seriousness, though, it's good to see you again. I got a kick out of your Konti-Nyuum return story.
Yes, it was a semi-spur of the moment thing.
And I'm glad you enjoyed it! I aim not only for lasting pleasure but for quality.
*glomps* My liege-lady! Oh man I am so happy to see you again on here =3
..wait should I do the bowing to she who bestowed upon me a title? Or does the title mean bowing is no longer necessary?
Ah well. *bowage*
I am fairly sure that in the case of bowing one is supposed to do that before they glomp, if they decide to bow at all.
-July, from the floor
I'll keep it up and going for a few hours, on the off chance anyone wants to play.
Game is here and the password is "ppc".
Given the game is Cards Against Humanity, I would suggest not joining if you're somewhere where NSFW things are unappreciated, and to bring some brain bleach with you if you do decide to join in.
Also it's fairly unrepentedly awful because it is truly playing against humanity. Worst person wins.
Password is still 'ppc' and all former warnings still apply.
Love that game.
Else a PPC version would be great fun. And possibly larger than the quite frankly terrifying in size Homestuck set.
I'm glad to have you back, if just for a little while. {= )
~Neshomeh
Because with who else are you able to share your woes of the wiki with, hm?
That was very impressive tale, and will be added to the Cyclopaedia forthwith. (Though there may be questions about some of the names - there's a lot of new stuff in there).
It was also good to find out exactly who was responsible for my first barony being overtaken by republican (as in, supporting a republic - no connection to the US political party) rabble. Good grief, with that and the El-Jheycom loyalists, it's shocking the whole island didn't collapse into civil war. (In-universe, that is - the real world is slightly different. ;))
So. Welcome back. I hope you have a good month-and-a-half, and (in case I forget later) good luck with the Navy!
hS
Well a few such as Bie are hopefully selfexplanatory.
As for Iric, that was entirely unintended, and therefore not my fault whatsoever, as louder voices had prevailed to me to keep such rabble away from more civilized places. :P
I intend to, hopefully!
I mean, "the lowlives and criminals who weren’t tolerated in Borrd, whom the knight was asked to keep in Iric, and away from the more civil lands of Plort"? Sure, there were bad sorts there, but it seems like you're trying to tar them all as The Bad Guys without cause.
And what've you been up to?
... it's fiction. Just like Kaitlyn isn't actually trying to revive the LJ community as a major part of the PPC community, the IRC isn't actually made up of thieves and villains. But it provides a nice in-universe explanation for why they engaged in violent rebellion and stole my castle, grr.
Furthermore, it's unreliable narrator fiction. Ex-Baron July has a different view on things to Baron Dann, who has a different view on things to Baron Huinesoron (specifically, Baron H. thinks Iric is a horrible nation that should never have been made, Baron D. thinks it's wonderful and barely ever leaves, and Baron J. thinks it was a marvellous idea that went bad, was purged, and then turned against her). Which is right? Probably none of 'em.
Since the Republic is a rather debatable area, I've refrained from adding much of the history to its actual entry. All of Baron July's comments are confined to her personal entry. I will expand the Iric entries at some point, but - as with El-Jheycom - the viewpoints of the various sides will go unmentioned.
hS
...the real thieves and villains hang around in Baron Huinesoron's Northern and Southern tax-havens. Seriously. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.
-Baron Phobos
How can you even dream of maligning those proud folk? The bold miners of the south, the... uh... village of tailor-orcs to the north...
...
... all right, you might have a point about the north. But I won't hear a word against the south! Without them, you wouldn't have all that fancy ironwork you've decked Cokirt out in.
(The second Plort thread is coming soon, I promise. I didn't dream it would be this popular...)
hS
Wechi's main export outside of knowledge is rocks and sheep.
(The fact I co-opted it as a means for my return means it was well and truly an excellent idea, good sir.)
Dirty thieving Borrdian barons, think they're better than me just because they've never been driven out of th
This is, of course, for entirely fair reasons related to the scarcity of metals, and the need for such to be in the hands of the eldest nation.Skintflint pigs but our day will come the last thing you see will be the Burning Sun arise
Baron hS
It really is a story, and I tried to make the unreliable narrator aspect as clear as possible, because I do know that not everyone's bad guys.
There's really no other way to slice it when its primary occupants at the time were Jack117 and OrangeDream and I really was asked by one or two people to not kick them out because otherwise they'd (specifically Jack) would take their creepiness to the board.
It's all pure curiosity anyway, since none of the interpretation gets written down, but...
-Cockerelgnash?
-Nova Imperium?
-Teiemeffae? (It sounds like 'TMFA', but I don't know what that could stand for)
-Deegan?
I think I got the rest.
hS
Cockrelgnash is Roosterteeth, those purveyors of internet entertainment that long ago started with just machinima and have expanded far beyond that in recent years.
The Nova Imperium is Imperium Nova, a spreadsheety game/RP board I used to be in wherein you rolled up a RNG dynasty in space and then politicked and spread your influence through various spheres of ways to make income, because space nobility.
Teiemeffae does indeed stand for 'TMFA', which stands in turn for the Tenchi Muyo Fanfiction Archive, which has long since essentially shut down and is closed off to people who'd want to take a looksee. It had a pretty large and dedicated section just for MSTs.
The Deegan band of the Keen lands refers to the old Keenspot forum for the Dominic Deegan webcomic. A truly unruly lot we were.
I am so glad to hear from you again! :D I haven't seen you online in forever and I was worried.
I'm glad things are finally happening on the military front, after all the delays they out you through. I still wish you had more time to hang out, too, though.
Um, also, I noticed you locked some of your PPC GDocs. Were you planning to reopen those? 'Cause I still hadn't finished reading all of your missions. <_>
My internet's been making irc a task, and between that and some computer trouble I had little incentive, but I'll try to hop on more there until I vanish.
And ha, yeah, considering I switched which branch entirely you could say I got fed up.
As for the GDocs, I was trying to do a wholesale transfer/setup so I suppose I need to finish and publicize that.
Just tell me which things to do, and we'll get 'er done. I'm so eager to finally fix all the links, you have no idea. Well, maybe you do. Still!
~Neshomeh
Just a straight up port to that site I set up, with hopes of limited mangling of everything.
I've largely lowered my hopes of 'get things edited so it's of Excellent Quality' to 'have it actually public again'.
That was a beautifully done re-intro. Absolutely amazing.
Under the circumstances, I felt I had to make a proper reintroduction, rather than go 'yo so I came back what's up has anyone set the place on fire recently?'.
I think I recognise your name, if only from your stories!
Anyways, welcome back!
*showers July with packing peanuts*
(And your Plort story was wonderfully done, and the last sentence reminded me of Night Vale, and I use way to many exclamation points on returnbie posts. Hi!)
-Aila
Thank you.
And woe and alas, for I will never be able to get these packing peanuts out of my hair.
(And once more another thank you! Though I cannot say much on Night Vale itself, since I am canonblind, I'm going to have to figure that was a compliment and that you are a fan of it.)
It's great to see you again, July!