All right, time for more responses.

Subject: All right, time for more responses.
Author: Outhra
Posted on: 2014-01-27 04:06:00 UTC

Subjectivity first: Yay, you used my gifts! The little Lord Vyce is absolutely adorable, and now I'm wondering what sort of fighting style one would use with a battlespork. It would probably involve lots of thrusting and blocking, since the sharp bits are only on the end, but there's both space between the sharp bits to intercept a weapon and only a small amount of blade that a block could conceivably dull. I've always hated the way that swordfights look in movies, with people constantly slamming the blades of their swords together while they fight. Maybe you can get away with that if your sword was indestructible, or made of plasma like a lightsaber is, but if you're using a metal blade, you're just going to be getting all kinds of chips in it if you smash the sharp part against someone else's sharp part.
Also, in unrelated news, you putting Linkara and Wheatley so close to each other on Linda's favorites list is making me imagine a probably altogether-too-large number of Atop the Fourth Wall/Portal crossovers. My favorites are probably corrupted!Nimue teleporting Linkara down into Comicron One's inner structure and forcing him to portal-gun through the corridors to escape, since it would be the only way to outwit her sensors, and Lord Vyce's living data form taking over a personality core. It's only blue portals from here on out.

Okay, now to what I really came here for: analysis. First, I'm not seeing anything on this "Tabitha". If she is intended as the Atwoods' partner, she should have a section as well, so that we can see what they look like as a team as well as individuals.
When two people are partners, they would normally need to share an RC and Department. There is nothing wrong with having a brother and sister work in different portions of the PPC, but they would need separate partners in order to do that, because Departments are not interchangeable. If Linda got a Bad Slash overflow mission as part of her Floaters job, would Dean simply not be able to go with her? His purview is Mary Sues, and doesn't necessarily overlap with Bad Slash, but if the two Atwoods were partners, they would need to go on all of their missions together. And if Linda just decided to only go on Mary Sue-related missions so that she could be with her brother, wouldn't it be easier to just transfer to the DMS?
Also, if you are planning on submitting a Permission piece soon, you are going to need to get it betaed before submitting it here, to ensure that you keep spelling and capitalization in order. Saying that someone is skilled in "long-range" attacks is very different from saying that he is skilled in "long-raged" attacks, for example, and "the Board" is very different from "the broad", not to mention a few other miscellaneous mistakes. One swapped letter implied that Dean is capable of causing pain at a distance through the power of his anger, and not only does the Word World jump all over things like that, it just doesn't look very good.
You probably are going to need to explain the "a Mary Sue killed their mother with plot holes that sent them to the PPC" angle before getting much farther. Not only is that pretty dark, it raises a few significant questions, "Why did the Sue attack their mother in the first place?" and "How and why did the Sue open a plot hole to the PPC?" being the big ones. In addition, having "a relative was killed by (opponent), so (protagonist) swore vengeance on all (opponent)s" is one of those bits of backstory that will need to affect the story in some way, or it runs the risk of being trivialized, which is a nasty badfic trait. When you get right down to it, the immediate death of a presumably-beloved family member would have a sizable effect on someone's psyche, and you don't want to run the risk of being comparable to the Sues that have their whole species slaughtered in front of them, but then cheerily go off on adventures and romance a main character and are never affected by their horrible tragedy ever again. It's shaky ground, is what I'm trying to say, because following through could easily be too dark for the PPC, but not following through would be trivializing death.
Their personalities are very bare-bones, but seem decent enough so far. You'll need to elaborate on a few more traits before their final form, but what they have now is a good basis to build off of.

Lastly, miscellaneous questions.
Why does Dean have a mini-sewing machine? What does he use it for? Making tiny scarves for mini-Turrets?
Which version of the Pokémon continuum are they from? The games, the anime, or one of the manga?
When did they pick up all of their fandoms and technology? I suppose the former could be explained away by saying that they showed affinity for them during agent training, but as for the latter, I don't recall the Pokémon continuum having smart phones and wireless Internet. I'd almost say that the continuum seems to have the rough technological level of the 1990s, but it has matter-to-energy conversion, giant airships, the ability to restore life from lifeless material, and whatever process was responsible for creating Golurk and Claydol, so that's not right.

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I got my agents up and ready :D by 123bugsy on 2014-01-27 01:07:00 UTC Reply

Here are the agents that everyone here helped me get off the ground :D I hope a lot of people like them

To be quick with it, they basically discovered the PPC by via plothole created by a Mary sue (this process also killed their mother, will be explained in full later)

Dean Atwood, a quick description: Dean is a decent shot despite being far sited and knows what to do when someone needs medical attention, so between his two partners he mostly sticks to long raged attacks and medical care.
Though Dean is a nice guy he prefers to be alone as such he would never be the one to start a conversation and prefers to listen more then talk when in a conversation. Because of a certain incident involving an evil, super powered, Mary sue and their mother, both gained a very strong hate for Mary sues, though it was Dean who joined DMS.

Linda Atwood, a quick description: Linda is excellent in hand to hand combat but is terrible in long range and is so far only decent with the battlespork she was given. Unlike her brother, Linda is incredibly sociable and is always ready to talk, unfortunately she tends to talk over others and most of the time its unintentional. Though both of them hate Mary sues with a passion she became a DF because she is actually kind of squeamish, not terribly enough that she wont kill a Mary sue if her brother can't but she would rather not.

if you want a visual on them click here: http://123bugsy-universe.tumblr.com/

as usual tell me if anything is wrong and what I should fix, please and thank you :)

re-done! by 123bugsy on 2014-01-29 06:29:00 UTC Reply

So I re-did the agent info I hope this is much better. :)

Agent Linda

Home continuum: Pokémon (anime)

Age: 21

Department: DMS

Leagues: Sinnoh (top 64 in the Lily of the Valley Conference), Johto (top 60 in the Silver Conference), Unova (top 48 in the Vertress Conference), and was unable to compete in the Kalos Conference (joining the PPC being the reason) but did get all eight badges
(Note: did not compete alongside Ash Ketchum, competed long after him)

Personality: Linda is an energetic, social, and bold young lady with a love of adventure and discovery. Sometimes when she gets extremely focused on something, she forgets everything else around her. This does not get too bad as long as there is someone to help her keep track (usually Dean). Linda thinks the PPC is the best place to be; a new and exciting adventure every second, new and interesting people to see and meet (even if they are Mary sues, for they are always interesting), and every time she gets back to their RC she knows she helped the word world for the better. She also loves to draw, so it’s not oncoming to see her doodling in her sketch book form time to time.

Backstory: Linda and Dean were just your average Pokémon trainers, until they got sucked into a plothole. Lucky for them they were sucked straight into the PPC. After some explaining, Linda was instantly hooked on the idea of joining the PPC and became an agent alongside her bother. While there she and Dean became friends with another new agent named Tabitha (a magical girl) and since then they have occasionally joined each other on missions (when it is appropriate).

Skills: If there’s one thing Linda’s an expert on, its parings (or ships/shipping) she even has an art book dedicated to keeping track of canon parings, OTPS, popular fan parings, and popular crack parings. She prefers hand-to-hand combat over long-ranged (mostly due to being a very bad shot) but after receiving a battlespork of zillywut, she has been learning how to wield it properly. Both Linda and Dean own a mega ring.

Agent Dean

Home continuum: Pokémon (anime)

Age: 21

Department: DMS

Leagues: Sinnoh (winner in the Lily of the Valley Conference, also hall of famer), Johto (top 4 in the Silver Conference), Unova (top 4 in the Vertress Conference), and was unable to compete in the Kalos Conference (joining the PPC being the reason) but did get all eight badges
(Note: did not compete alongside Ash Ketchum, competed long after him)

Personality: Dean is a friendly and intelligent but is very quiet and prefers to ether be alone or with Linda and/or Tabitha. Dean actually has aspergers; as such he is very awkward in conversations and does not understand non-verbal cues at all, he also likes it when commands that given to him are very specific (which is why when he makes plans he tends to over think and over detail them). Dean is the kind of AS person who dose like physical contact (as long as it’s friendly and what he deems appropriate). Even though he has AS he dose like the life of a PPC agent (even though he is still getting use to the change) mostly for the fact that he can now do something about tough’s terrible fanfics and Mary sues. He also enjoys sewing and is very good at it.

Backstory: Dean and Linda were just your average Pokémon trainers, until they got sucked into a plothole. Lucky for them they were sucked straight into the PPC. After some explaining, Linda was instantly hooked on the idea of joining the PPC, Dean on the other hand was very unsure (to say the least). He was scared but didn’t want to stand in between Linda and what she considered her dream P.T. retirement job (or worse, have her join and leave him behind). After some taught he joined with his sister as his partner. While there he and Linda became friends with another new agent named Tabitha (a magical girl) and since then they have occasionally joined each other on missions (when it is appropriate).

Skills: Dean loves to learn about new fandoms and will learn as much as he can about them. Between the twins he is the one who makes the plans, though he over thinks them a lot. He is near sighted but this is not that big of a problem. Dean’s preference in combat is guns, mostly pistols, but he is also very reliable when it comes to medical aid. Both Dean and Linda own a mega ring.

Also I re-did Linda’s and Dean little bio pages, nothing to big in my opinion but I thought I should still tell and show: http://123bugsy-universe.tumblr.com/

I know that I’m trending on some prickly ground here but I think I can make this work with Dean having AS. As usually tell me what needs fixing and I’ll fix it as soon as I can. :)

Re: re-done! by Outhra on 2014-01-30 23:15:00 UTC Reply

The Atwoods are more fleshed out than before, but the new details raise a few more questions.

What Pokémon did the Atwoods have before falling into HQ? If you're giving your Trainers such a high ranking in canonical events(especially Dean), they must have some powerful Pokémon to match that ranking. Do the Atwoods still have those Pokémon? If so, what do they do with them?

You say that Linda and Dean will partner up with Tabitha "sometimes". Does this mean that Tabitha leaves her partner to do so, that Tabitha works solo, or that Tabitha's partner will also usually come, but you haven't hammered out his/her/its details yet? Also, just out of curiosity, which continuum is Tabitha from?

From what little information we have on Mega Rings and related objects through X and Y, Mega Evolution-inducing items are very rare, or at least only given out to certain people at certain times. Why do both Atwoods have one?

What exactly are you referring to when you say Dean wants to oppose "tough's terrible fanfics"? Is tough a notorious badfic author known for producing a wide range of Mary Sues?

answers by 123bugsy on 2014-01-31 00:39:00 UTC Reply

Sorry, I really am, but I haven't talked to my sis much. Not because we're on bad terms but mostly because she is working on some things for her deviantart group and I don't want to make her feel rushed. I planing on talking to her about everything ether Sunday or Monday. She basically has the character down but there are still some things we need to discuss, obviously.

Now, about the Atwoods, I'm going to put a full list of their teams on the Board at some point but it will be after the first mission me and my sis do. The reason being is that the mission we have right now doesn't call for any Pokemon, so it would be pointless to bring any of them along. I do plan on giving the info out at least before I even think about doing any Badfics in any of the Pokemon continuums (I hope that makes sense). When it comes to were they put them, I'm not entirely sure, I just assumed that they would have a PC in their RC but if I've learned any thing about the PPC, it's never assume. So now I don't know what to say about this, I never saw anything about how or where Pokemon agents keep their Pokemon while living at the PPC, so would you have any ideas?

When it comes to the Mega Rings i'll be honest and say I just want them to have the ability to Mega Evolve their Pokemon. I know this sounds selfish but can I get away with just this one thing. Pretty, please with sugar on top. OuO

Also I went and fixed somethings with the spelling, so I'll post that after i'm done with this. :)

P.S. I like to believe that to access one's PC account, one must type one's Trainer ID number into the PC (again if that makes any sense).

Re: Trainer ID by Storme Hawk on 2014-01-31 01:49:00 UTC Reply

I like the idea of characters using their Trainer ID to use the PC's in the Pokemon World like some sort of username, but the problem I see with it is that the Atwoods are from the anime universe, yes? If they are, I can't remember Trainer ID's ever coming in the anime at all, in fact I was fairly certain they were a game-only thing. I may be wrong (I often am), but it just caught my eye.

well lets just say they have some sort of... by 123bugsy on 2014-01-31 03:02:00 UTC Reply

username and password to access the PC, for how else is someone suppose to get into THEIR PC and not someone else's I would have no idea. :P

actually, I'll post the bio's again after... by 123bugsy on 2014-01-31 00:41:00 UTC Reply

the Mega Ring thing is answered.

I donÂ’t know anything about Mega Rings, but by Hieronymus Graubart on 2014-02-02 17:33:00 UTC Reply

I may have learned something here:

a) Owning a Mega Ring is unusual and needs a good explanation.

b) Both your agents owning a Mega Ring each is nearly incredible and needs a very good explanation.

c) You don’t already know a point in a mission you are planning where it would be more funny (or more dramatic, but the PPC mostly goes by funny) if your agents could surprise the Sue with their ability to Mega Evolve their Pokemon.

d) Nor do you plan a mission in a badfic that is so dangerous that you know already that your agents will need the assistance of mega-evolved Pokemon. (If it even works this way. Mind, I know Pokemon only from watching my daughter play the early editions several years ago.)

e) Also, you haven’t planned a mission-surpassing story arc in which your agents and their Pokemon will develop in a way that necessarily includes mega-evolution at some point.

f) You just want your agents to have this ability for no apparent reason, or you want to keep your motives secret.

As far as I can determine, you may well end up getting Permission, writing five missions and three interludes, finding something more interesting and leaving the PPC without ever using these Mega Rings. Thus, it seems unreasonable to go through the trouble to explain the Mega Rings just to keep them.

On the other hand, you have already been called out for retreating whenever you are challenged. Saying now that your agents don’t own Mega Rings, and then bringing it up again when you actually find an opportunity to use these Mega Rings, would be weird.

So, your best strategy may be to put a meta-joke on your agent bios, like:
"They both own Mega Rings, but keep this secret, because they are aware that they cannot use them until their author comes up with a very good explanation for this incredible fact."
Or more simple:
"They may own Mega Rings, but this is still just a rumour."

Thus you get more time to think about it, and only need to confirm the rumour by telling the back story when you actually make use of it.

HG, trying to be as helpful as he can be

could the plothole be the reason? by 123bugsy on 2014-02-03 19:24:00 UTC Reply

What I mean is, could the plothole that brought them to the PPC also 'give' them the mega rings.

Like, hear me out, before the plothole they don't have any mega rings or mega stones (what you give to the Pokemon to mega evolve them) but after the plothole sucks them through, they suddenly have them and the correct mega stones for their Pokemon, could this work out?

(Warning: the rest is just me trying to give a good reason to have the mega rings in the first place)

When ever me and my sister go and do a mission in the Pokemon continuum I was planing to do it like this; Linda and Dean grab the correct Pokemon for the right time period (like say the fic is taking place manly in the Johto region time period and because of this know one would know what on earth a six gen Pokemon would be and that would cause problems for the agents if they showed one during a battle) but, oh no, the sue/stu they have been sent to destroy has a legendary Pokemon with her/him! well that is were the mega Pokemon would come in to play, "but wait" you say, "wouldn't that cause problems for the agents, for as you said no one would know what a mega Pokemon is in the Johto time period." well you are right but what are the agents going to do about that legendary now?

Fight it themselves? No, that would put the agents in needless danger (and even with their skills an un-winnable battle, plus it would also harm the legendary in the processes). Have the Pokemon fight it without mega evolution? Well that could work, in them games continuum, but in the anime regular Pokemon would stand little chance against any legendary (and to have them be equal or even defeat the legendary as a regular Pokemon would make them very sue-y, in my opinion). have the agents through out their own legendary? No, for that would make them no better then the sue/stu they are fighting against (plus, Linda and Dean don't have any legendary Pokemon).

"well I'm out of ideas" you say "but what can the mega evolved Pokemon do about the legendary any way?"

Another good question, you see unlike regular Pokemon a mega would be able to last much longer in a battle with a legendary. Its basically the best chance the agents got to even distract the legendary, while the agents 'take care' of the sue/stu the legendary thinks is its 'dear partner'. When it comes to the people who see the mega; well if their just another sue/stu their just going to end up dead (or joining the PPC) anyway or if not, then they will just have their memory erased. Of course when saying this will bring this question to mind 'why not just bring any kind of gen Pokemon with them?' well it would just cause instant confusion if one just threw out a Lucario vs. throwing out a Houndoom and then mega evolving it when the legendary is brought in.

I hope this all makes sense, I'm sorry if its really long I just wanted to get this out of my brain. :)

But you don't-- but that's not-- by Huinesoron on 2014-02-03 20:55:00 UTC Reply

Okay, the thing about the PPC is that our response to 'the enemy has a big weapon' should never be 'I need a bigger one'. I urge you to read Sunrise Elf for just one of many examples of how agents with no weapons managed to kill a Mary-Sue. Would it have been funny if they brought a magic sword along to do the job? No. No it would not.

The PPC suffers chronic, well, everything shortages for a reason: because it's far more interesting to read about agents desperately improvising everything than it is to read about Jaycacia Thornbyrd.

It is telling that when my agent acquired a powerful magic ring, it ended up causing him nothing but trouble. He got spotted by canons, and eventually blew himself up.

Oh no, they've got a legendary pokemon! Yeah, well, I've got a tranquiliser dart. Take that, canonical convention. ;)

hS

Or alternatively, you could just smash the PokÃ© Ball. by Outhra on 2014-02-04 00:51:00 UTC Reply

If the Poké Ball is destroyed, the Pokémon contained inside it is released, as a safety measure. The legendary Pokémon could then exact some well-deserved vengeance on the being who contained it against its will. Simple and effective, and you don't need to bend the rules sideways or pester Medical for high-powered animal sedatives to do it.

On another note, I never read French Pony's missions before today, since I tend not to read most of the spin-offs that are primarily chronicled on PPC: The Lost Tales on account of the pop-ups, but I'm actually pretty glad he or she only made two. Adam and Frenchie seem pointlessly sadistic. It's one thing to off a Sue in a particularly painful manner as a matter of catharsis for an Agent, or to kill her through poetic justice, but out of the two that were published, the one Huinesoron just linked has the techies laughing like psychopaths as the Sue is electrocuted in front of them and the other Sue was left to be torn apart by mini-Balrogs that French Pony twisted out of character so that they would act like wild animals. Lordy lord. It's almost as bad as that time when Rez Montrose deliberately handed her Firefly Sue to the Reavers, and her partner just went along with it. Almost. Pretty much nothing can be worse than that.

Pardon me if you addressed this already, by son_of_heaven176 on 2014-01-30 02:31:00 UTC Reply

but of Dean is near-sighted, why is he the long-range-weapon user of the two? Shouldn't he be the melee fighter?

gosh diggidy! I meant far sighted (nm) by 123bugsy on 2014-01-30 20:45:00 UTC Reply
if* (nm) by son_of_heaven176 on 2014-01-30 02:32:00 UTC Reply

Go-Go-Gadget Thread Hijack! by Beekeeper Klein on 2014-01-28 09:40:00 UTC Reply

My revised agent profiles for you guys to dissect. Sorry 'bout the hijack, 123bugsy.

RC#7149 - Department of Floaters

Formerly the All-Purpose Yugioh Department, but I can't write duels to save my life, it seems.

--

Agent Jackets

Home continuum: World 1

Species: Human

Class: College Student/Amateur Duelist/Floater

Personality: Jackets is a jumpy, polite, absent-minded introvert with a nigh-insatiable thirst for knowledge and a fondness for books, SCIENCE and body horror. She also has self-esteem issues, which she is trying to overcome. She is very loyal to the organization and a stickler for rules. She truly believes that since the PPC rescued her, she owes them her life.

Backstory: Jackets was a was a college student who has found herself sucked straight into a Yugioh GX badfic. She was eventually rescued by the PPC, but instead of returning to World 1, she renounced her old name and joined the PPC as a chance to save her beloved Word Worlds from badfic mayhem and repay the PPC.

Skills: Jackets has a good grasp of multiple canons, but there are a lot of TV shows and books she is totally cluless about. She is also well-read in a number of subjects and is often seen reading books on varying subjects, even during missions. She has shown a preference to using poisons and nasty chemicals.

She absolutely has no sense of direction, and has to rely on either Catharsis or SP in order not to get lost.

--

SP

Home Continuum: Yugioh GX

Species: Duel Spirit (Specifically, D.D. Scout Plane)

SP is Jackets' Spirit Partner. She found the card while wandering about and decided to keep it, since she always wanted to have Different Dimension cards. She cannot see it (yet), but she can hear it on occasion.

It is easily exasperated, but it always does its best to help her.

--

Agent Catharsis

Home continuum: Fire Emblem 8

Species: Human

Class: Summoner

Personality: Catharsis is intelligent, overworked, willing to please and kind (a bit too kind for a PPC agent), with a large number of neuroses and a rather weak stomach. He is easily nauseated, disgusted and disturbed by badfic shenanigans, and has a crippling fear of humanoid abominatons. In spite of this, he is determined to do what he considers the right thing.

Backstory: Catharsis was one of Prince Lyon's researchers during the events of FE8. He went by a different name back then. He was supposed to have been killed during the events of the game, but he barely survived via accidentally transporting himself to the PPC with a warp staff. After some of his initial shock has worn off, he volunteered to join the PPC.

Skills/Traits: Catharsis has an absurd magic resistance that can act as a repellant against ambient magic and magical versions of Aura of Smooth. (As to how much he can resist is unknown, as he is terrified of Mary Sues and variants thereof.) As a FE8 Summoner, he is also capable of using Dark magic along with the ability to use staves and summon semi-disposable units called "Phantoms".

He could also see things other people couldn't. This may be the reason he is terrified of Sues. (Wobbles the Clown just plain freaks him out though. Sorry, Wobbles.)

----

thats ok, but can I ask you some something... by 123bugsy on 2014-01-28 20:15:00 UTC Reply

can I use your revised agent profiles for my agents :?

I'm not asking to copycat anything (I never would be that stupid) but as an example of what I was thinking:

Agent Linda

Home continuum: Pokémon (anime)

Age: 21

Department: DMS

basically like that, I feel like I should ask you first before I do anything so I don't get people saying that I ripped you off, so can I :)

Sure, go ahead. *shrugs* (nm) by Beekeeper Klein on 2014-01-29 00:35:00 UTC Reply
That's more or less the standard model anyway. by Outhra on 2014-01-28 20:32:00 UTC Reply

It's been used in the majority of Permission Requests and other spots where Agents are being presented(at least out of those that I'm aware of), because it's just a good model for organizing information.

Minor question by Antigone68104 on 2014-01-27 12:06:00 UTC Reply

I'm a lousy shot myself, so I may be missing something here, but I'm not quite getting why "Dean is a decent shot despite being far sited". Far-sightedness means Dean can see clearly at distance but has problems at close-range. If he sticks with long-range attacks, it shouldn't interfere.

forgot to change that, my bad by 123bugsy on 2014-01-27 16:41:00 UTC Reply

yeah... he was near sited at first but I changed to far sited and I guess when I was in the moment of writing I didn't really bother to change the wording, so thank for pointing that out.

In all honesty I think I'm going to re-post this after i'm sure everyone has said their piece to this one, so I know exactly what I should change in the new one. :)

Uh... not in another new thread, please. by Huinesoron on 2014-01-27 17:03:00 UTC Reply

We didn't really need two threads about your agents in the top four, y'know?

(And while I'm here: capital letters! Please! And it's 'sighted', not 'sited'. The PPC has kind of a thing going about correct spelling, punctuation, grammar, and capitalisation, so please, try to keep an eye on it)

And! Something's been worrying me about your method of creating characters, and it's something I've seen before. You seem to spend your time writing things into their backstory and descriptions, and then when anyone questions anything, you write it straight back out again. That suggests two things:

-You don't really care or have a reason to put things in; if you did, you'd be better to explain or expand on it, rather than just cross it off.

-You don't seem to have the confidence to stand up for your decisions.

As an example of either or both of these, you said: 'I think i'll just get rid of the Iphones I don't know what I was thinking then.' But... this is, what, your third or fourth characters thread? Did you actually just write (draw) the tech stuff in on a whim (in which case, you're not using the threads to hash out your characters, but as a sort of 'can't use this, what's next on the list?'), or did you just... see someone ask a question, and fold immediately?

I'm not trying to sound harsh (I'm in a bit of a hurry, so I don't have a chance to go back over this), so I apologise if I do; but I think this is a significant point you need to address - to yourself - in your growth as a writer.

hS

don't worry, i'm not going to post a new thread by 123bugsy on 2014-01-27 20:15:00 UTC Reply

Thank you for the SPGaC corrections I always appreciate it, I really need to get my sister to look over this stuff.

I think I'm a little of both, sometimes I just don't think or notice something is important until someone points it out and if they do I will just fold and and change it or just get rid of it. I think I do this because i'm just trying to be agreeable to everyone and I find it easier to just change what I got or get rid of it, as I feel I have this really nasty habit of going beyond what is ok in guide lines (even when I know were the line is).

I really, really want to be apart of this group and so I feel I should just conform myself to what I feel the group wants my characters to be, if this isn't what people want me to be please, please don't be mad at me because I can change as long as I know I have people I can stand by. :)

All right, time for more responses. by Outhra on 2014-01-27 04:06:00 UTC Reply

Subjectivity first: Yay, you used my gifts! The little Lord Vyce is absolutely adorable, and now I'm wondering what sort of fighting style one would use with a battlespork. It would probably involve lots of thrusting and blocking, since the sharp bits are only on the end, but there's both space between the sharp bits to intercept a weapon and only a small amount of blade that a block could conceivably dull. I've always hated the way that swordfights look in movies, with people constantly slamming the blades of their swords together while they fight. Maybe you can get away with that if your sword was indestructible, or made of plasma like a lightsaber is, but if you're using a metal blade, you're just going to be getting all kinds of chips in it if you smash the sharp part against someone else's sharp part.
Also, in unrelated news, you putting Linkara and Wheatley so close to each other on Linda's favorites list is making me imagine a probably altogether-too-large number of Atop the Fourth Wall/Portal crossovers. My favorites are probably corrupted!Nimue teleporting Linkara down into Comicron One's inner structure and forcing him to portal-gun through the corridors to escape, since it would be the only way to outwit her sensors, and Lord Vyce's living data form taking over a personality core. It's only blue portals from here on out.

Okay, now to what I really came here for: analysis. First, I'm not seeing anything on this "Tabitha". If she is intended as the Atwoods' partner, she should have a section as well, so that we can see what they look like as a team as well as individuals.
When two people are partners, they would normally need to share an RC and Department. There is nothing wrong with having a brother and sister work in different portions of the PPC, but they would need separate partners in order to do that, because Departments are not interchangeable. If Linda got a Bad Slash overflow mission as part of her Floaters job, would Dean simply not be able to go with her? His purview is Mary Sues, and doesn't necessarily overlap with Bad Slash, but if the two Atwoods were partners, they would need to go on all of their missions together. And if Linda just decided to only go on Mary Sue-related missions so that she could be with her brother, wouldn't it be easier to just transfer to the DMS?
Also, if you are planning on submitting a Permission piece soon, you are going to need to get it betaed before submitting it here, to ensure that you keep spelling and capitalization in order. Saying that someone is skilled in "long-range" attacks is very different from saying that he is skilled in "long-raged" attacks, for example, and "the Board" is very different from "the broad", not to mention a few other miscellaneous mistakes. One swapped letter implied that Dean is capable of causing pain at a distance through the power of his anger, and not only does the Word World jump all over things like that, it just doesn't look very good.
You probably are going to need to explain the "a Mary Sue killed their mother with plot holes that sent them to the PPC" angle before getting much farther. Not only is that pretty dark, it raises a few significant questions, "Why did the Sue attack their mother in the first place?" and "How and why did the Sue open a plot hole to the PPC?" being the big ones. In addition, having "a relative was killed by (opponent), so (protagonist) swore vengeance on all (opponent)s" is one of those bits of backstory that will need to affect the story in some way, or it runs the risk of being trivialized, which is a nasty badfic trait. When you get right down to it, the immediate death of a presumably-beloved family member would have a sizable effect on someone's psyche, and you don't want to run the risk of being comparable to the Sues that have their whole species slaughtered in front of them, but then cheerily go off on adventures and romance a main character and are never affected by their horrible tragedy ever again. It's shaky ground, is what I'm trying to say, because following through could easily be too dark for the PPC, but not following through would be trivializing death.
Their personalities are very bare-bones, but seem decent enough so far. You'll need to elaborate on a few more traits before their final form, but what they have now is a good basis to build off of.

Lastly, miscellaneous questions.
Why does Dean have a mini-sewing machine? What does he use it for? Making tiny scarves for mini-Turrets?
Which version of the Pokémon continuum are they from? The games, the anime, or one of the manga?
When did they pick up all of their fandoms and technology? I suppose the former could be explained away by saying that they showed affinity for them during agent training, but as for the latter, I don't recall the Pokémon continuum having smart phones and wireless Internet. I'd almost say that the continuum seems to have the rough technological level of the 1990s, but it has matter-to-energy conversion, giant airships, the ability to restore life from lifeless material, and whatever process was responsible for creating Golurk and Claydol, so that's not right.

Quick Answer by Storme Hawk on 2014-01-27 18:44:00 UTC Reply

Sorry, just saw this and thought I'd add my two cents.
There is wireless internet in Pokemon, definitely the games and anime (not sure about the manga) if you think about. The PC, and the ability to transfer Pokemon from one place to another is one example of wireless tech, others include the Pokegear, Pokenav and the X-transciever all working like mobile phones, the first also being a radio. It wouldn't be an advanced wireless network to the point that we know today, but there is definitely a wireless network of sorts around. I'd say especially in the regions from the last two or three generations of games.

Addition by Storme Hawk on 2014-01-27 23:44:00 UTC Reply

Also in the movies (and maybe the anime, I can't remember) they do set up video calls between wherever Ash is and normally either Oak or Tracey in Pallet Town.

Wireless network, maybe. by Outhra on 2014-01-28 01:47:00 UTC Reply

I personally always saw the Xtransceiver and its upgraded form, the Holo Caster, more as a mobile phone version of the video call devices that the Pokémon Centers use(which, inexplicably, Bulbapedia has neither a page about nor a name for), and the PC as an extension of the Poké Ball's ability to keep Pokémon stored in data form indefinitely.

The mobile phone analogues would be wireless by default, but anything wireless seems mostly to be for communication only in the Pokémon universe, instead of being multi-purpose devices like a smart phone or a personal computer, and their technology hasn't yet developed to the point where a cohesive information sharing service exists. I can see why the franchise's creators wouldn't advance it any further, though, even though the rest of the series has shown several instances of technology so advanced that it's practically magic: if they did have an Internet analogue, the Pokédex would become obsolete, and no one would want to go around catchin' em all to fill up a database that people around the world already completed piecemeal in their spare time.

You can talk about the non-obviousness of progress... by wobblestheclown on 2014-01-28 10:50:00 UTC Reply

But the Kalos region has powersats. Surely they can get their act together enough to build a portable internet brick.

Porygon. by Huinesoron on 2014-01-29 09:16:00 UTC Reply

Porygon is a Pokemon made out of computer code. In other words, in the Pokemon world, if you can program a computer, you can make a Pokemon - or a hundred of them, if you want. And then you can let them loose in the ecosystem.

In a world where that is possible, programming is a serious, viable, and easy terrorist weapon. Given the profusion of terrorist groups floating around, it makes perfect sense that it would also be a restricted technology.

And, based on the games, it seems to be. Every region has its own communications-and-information device - but they are all wildly different. There's no way the Pokétch and the PokéNav are both running, say, Java. Looking at just the Pokétch, the picture we're given is of one man coding the programs for it - and, given how frankly rubbish they are, he takes an inordinate amount of time to do so.

My theory is that he's having to program directly in machine code - there are no higher level programming languages in Pokeworld. If there were, digital Pokemon would be creatable on your home PC - no one would go hunting for them, because they could just custom-build their own.

... which leads to one conclusion: if the Pokemon universe ever gets an internet, that internet would very swiftly give birth to a varied race of digital Pokemon.

Or, as we know them, Digimon.

hS

Seems legit. by World-Jumper on 2014-01-29 19:07:00 UTC Reply

Now, I wonder, what would happen if Missingno entered the world of Digimon? Oh no...

It'd immediately be thrust into conflict with the D-Reaper. by Outhra on 2014-01-29 21:50:00 UTC Reply

The D-Reaper was specifically created as a security program for the Digital World when the network that the Digital World grew from was in its infancy. Normally, the D-Reaper's only directive is to delete sections of the population whenever there get to be too many new Digimon, but when it sees a program it deems to be inherently destructive, it snaps down on the threat and destroys it. That's what brought it into conflict with the DigiDestined when it appeared in the show; it had begun to see humanity as a corruptive force on the Digital World, with all of their new data created every day and all of the forced Digivolution that some of their children were introducing into the system.

A creature like Missingno, if introduced into the Digital World, would almost certainly register as a threat, if not an outright virus, and the D-Reaper would try to end the potential problem. Missingno might try to fight back, but the D-Reaper would most likely end up deleting or assimilating it due to its higher level of power, and then going back into a dormant state to prepare for the next incursion.
Of course, there's always the chance that Missingno's consciousness could be inadequately absorbed, and the D-Reaper, unprepared for an attack from within, might conceivably have its primitive mental structures overridden by the last desperate throes of Missingno's mind, leaving a dangerous glitch-being in undisputed control of a massively powerful creature of living data that can pass through the boundaries between universes. But what's the chance of that happening?

This is my new favourite bit of fan crazy. =oD (nm) by wobblestheclown on 2014-01-29 10:49:00 UTC Reply

thanks and explanations by 123bugsy on 2014-01-27 05:20:00 UTC Reply

I'm happy you liked Lord Vyce and I like you're thoughts on how someone would fight using the battlespork. :D

Now, on to explaining some things. First, Tabitha is my sis's agent character, so I can't tell you much or even draw her out until she finishes her. Second, so should I just put her in DMS or could could I put her in bad slash, i'm not trying to put them into different departments i'm just wondering if I can. Finally, I need to have my sis spell check my stuff more often, she is A LOT better at spelling then I am, which is why we are working together on this.

Now, to answer toughs miscellaneous questions.
Dean actually likes to sew and as such took a battery powered sewing machine on his and Linda's Pokemon journey, even though he is at the PPC now he has yet to get a bigger, proper one, if that makes any sense. :P
I would say they are from the games, as I'm playing the games with them in mind but their trainer backstory won't have the main plot of the games and will just take place in the games continuum.
I think i'll just get rid of the Iphones I don't know what I was thinking then. :P

I hoped this answered your questions, and if the didn't or made new ones please tell me so I can answer them. :)

actually I've been thinking... by 123bugsy on 2014-01-27 03:45:00 UTC Reply

lets just have it be a random plothole, the whole 'a Mary sue killed our mom' just seems to wangsty to me now so I just want to scrap it now. :)

That's probably for the best. by Outhra on 2014-01-27 04:10:00 UTC Reply

If you decide to drop it, you can disregard my questions on the matter. I posted my reply before I saw that you'd decided against including the death of a relative in their backstory.

Quick hijack by son_of_heaven176 on 2014-01-27 05:09:00 UTC Reply

Outhra, did you get my e-mail?

Both of them. by Outhra on 2014-01-27 05:30:00 UTC Reply

I'd been waiting for the second one to arrive so that I could respond to them both at roughly the same time.