Subject: I have mentioned it before, but might as well say it again.
Author:
Posted on: 2013-10-27 06:13:00 UTC
The fic is called Pinkamena: The Pink Shadow, supposedly set in the MLP universe, though Ponyville is neigh unrecognizable in this fic. I would link to it, but for some reason I am unable to access the google doc that this monstrosity is archived on, so I will have to link to the main doc here, and tell you to click on the name of the fic. Now, it is a half-finished MST, and has been for several months, so don't expect the full snarky goodness of a proper MST.
So, why is it the worst fic I have ever read? Well, the grammar, while not the best, is leaps and bounds ahead of what most would consider the worst fanfiction. That is the best possable thing I can say about this sticking piece of-
The characters are so insanely Out Of Character it makes me sick. Pinkamena is back from the infamous Cupcakes, and everypony says, "Welp, that's just crazy old Pinkie Pie! No harm done, except for the pony she just gutted! Just don't eat any cupcakes for a month or so!" Equestria is thrown completely out of sorts. Religion for some stupid reason comes to Equestria. So, is this religion a ponified version of several different religions brought together in one world, causing some conflicts in interests? No, it's only Christianity and Satanism directly from earth, brought to Equestria through the main character Dark Slash after he returned from Earth.
Oh yeah. The main character.
Dark Slash.
Where do I begin with this guy? He is a red and black alicorn with a katana as a cutie mark to represent his natural affinity for cutting ponies with swords, along with a second cutie mark behind it of 666, representing his deal with the Devil for supreme power. Yes, The Devil, as in Lucifer, Christianity's favorite villain. As a reward for his imortal soul, he now has a demon in his hooves which he can call forth whenever he wished, as well as superpony speed, strength, and- wait, did I say that the demon was in his hooves? Yes, I did, and not figuratively: his hooves are now white because they are the prison of one of Hell's greatest demons. This demon is a complete asshole. I'm sorry, I know I should not curse here, but that is the nicest thing I can say about that festering little...mmph, thing that dares even GLANCE at Equestria and it's citizens. Another thing about Dark Slash is his horn, another gift by the Devil. Oh yes, he was a pegasus before his little deal, and now he is an alicorn. Now, this should be fantastic news for him, right? WRONG! He hates alicorns, and anything to do with them! He constantly angsts on and on about how, "Boo ho, I am an alicorn now! I am going to BRUTALLY MURDER ANYPONY WHO MENTIONS IT! Because I am so torcherd by the fact that I AM A GOD NOW!" Further, he is married to Twilight Sparkle, has adopted Spike as a son, has brought not only earth religon but earth military with him from the other world, has a mashine that can trasport him "through the fourth wall," and...
You know, I think I will stop there though there is plenty, PLENTY, more I could yell about. The thing about this particular fic is the emotion it brings out of me. Most badfics make me shake my head, or laugh, or grumble about the poor writing ability of the authors (sorry, I know, don't rage against the authors, but I don't demean them personally when I grumble) or something along those lines. This fic, at the very thought of it, makes me angry. Very angry. Like, I punched things repeatedly to vent out anger levels of angry. I never get that mad, but this thing...
So yeah. This is the absolute, no questions asked, worst fic I have ever read.