Subject: To which the only response is:
Author:
Posted on: 2015-05-10 19:34:00 UTC
"No, I expect you to read some, because this is what you asked me to do, so don't be so damned ungrateful!"
Mothers. They can surprise you. Often, though, they do not.
So, a few days ago, my mom demanded I show her some of my PPC work to make sure I wasn't lying when I said we weren't "ripping on other people's stories". I decided to show her "Two Sues for the Price of One", and unexpectedly, she not only approved of it, she liked it.
Liked it a little too much. Now she wants to see other people's stories, as well as more of my own. I'm in a bit of a bind, guys, because if she sees anything with more than minorly offensive swearing or a passing reference to sex, I'm in deep sh*t.
So, if you guys have any tamer missions you can think of, I'm in desperate need of suggestions. Before you recommend, just... pretend like you'll give it to a very fussy granny to read.
Now if you'll excuse me, I'll be copying some of my missions into a duplicate document and performing cosmetic edits. :/
She took a look at the long, looong list of links I sent and said "Seriously? You expect me to read all these?"
*headdesks*
Well, thanks a lot, anyway. *sigh*
"No, I expect you to read some, because this is what you asked me to do, so don't be so damned ungrateful!"
Mothers. They can surprise you. Often, though, they do not.
It was like, "If she doesn't provide me stuff, I'll assume the majority of missions are bad and she's been hiding things". Still, I'm pretty irritated. Argh.
...we now have a long list of worksafe stories. We could make a wiki page of these recs!
~DF
You did exactly as you were told, which is a good thing overall. Even if she doesn't read them, you had an extensive list at the ready. Even if it was a bluff, you called it. You really can't complain when someone does what you ask of them, to the letter.
I'll start compiling a list of links to send to her right away. (Still open to suggestions, by the way.)
Hugs and internet cookies for everyone, you all saved my hide.
Could she try writing reviews of the missions she reads, so that we can know what she thinks of our work? That seems like it could be an interesting exercise for her.
I'm totally not trying to indirectly apologize to Madame Maz for last night's idiocy, nope.
But I'm biased like that. =]
My opinion would be to dredge up the missions of the really, really insane Bleepfics, give her those, and then give her the originals to read. That way she can compare and contrast. =]
I wrote the whole thing for 'public consumption', after all. And I doubt she'll mind Selene swearing in 200-year-old slang... ^_~
hS
Most of my stuff should be okay, but I don't know if you can show her only some of my stuff without her wanting to read everything on my site. "Blood Raining Night" is on my site, and I know that's right out. Everything up to that point should be okay, I think... except maybe "Ring Child." Nume drops the F-bomb a lot in that one. Oh, and "Cosmic Love," because slash and Mpreg. Everything comes with a helpful rating, though, so maybe you can persuade her that you never read the "bad" ones?
I'll definitely second the recommendation of "Brown DragonRider" and raise with "Harry Potter and the Dragonriders of Pern," though, because I know she likes Pern. {= ) HPDroP contains mild references to sexual things, but no actual sex, so hopefully that's all right.
All of my DMS missions ought to be all right, probably... and following Derik's adventures gets "Gestalt Therapy" into the mix.
Phobos' stuff should be okay, too, as long as you avoid the DBS one. The "Going Postal" stories are particularly on the "good clean fun" side of the spectrum.
I'll think some more about other stories that might be good to share. Maybe hS's Driftwood series?
~Neshomeh
Maaaaybe . . . my Sherlock Holmes mission? It's a fandom she (I assume) is at least partly familiar with, and has at least one moment I remember that compliments the badfic. I also put the "Sueish" character back to her former life, rather than outright killing her, so it's . . . I don't know, diet mission?
It's here. You might want to give it a quick read-through, just to double-check. I don't swear much myself, but I think the badfic did some, and I don't know if I included any in quotes.
Also, I'm sorry you're in this situation. Just keep in mind, if you end up needing to back off from the PPC for a while to keep in good standing with the parents, don't sweat it. It would suck, but we'll still be here waiting when you're able to hang out again. :)
My missions are hardly likely to be explicit, right?
...right?
Anyway, you could try the two PPC Camping Trips. I don't think anything too bad happened to them.
As for stuff I'd recommend to Iximaz's mom... well... I don't know if any of my solo missions are exactly kid-friendly. The only one that stands well on its own is my very first one and we all know how THAT went down... *shudders*
Honestly, I think the ONLY one of my missions that can be considered work-safe may be the Minecraft one (I'd link to it but I'm on mobile), and that was a relatively minor endeavor. Maybe my co-writes would stand a better chance - probably not the one with Iximaz's but definitely the one with eatpraylove, and probably my recent one with Voyd as well if she doesn't mind jumpscares and the like.
(Moms can surprise you, huh? :))
I wouldn't necessarily include my Blackout Interlude, both because it's currently unfinished and because if it was finished it would have...well, not particularly offensive swearing, but perhaps a little more of it than would be preferred (I blame the Winchesters. And Meg).
However: April Fool's Day stories are fun, funny, and not quite the usual sort of PPC writing, which could be pretty interesting and help give a broader view of what we're about! We're totally all about rabbit!agents, shhh. However, I would not link your mom to my lj account, mainly because it's also rehosting Deleterius material, which is...not even remotely always worksafe, unfortunately. I really should have put it in a different journal, but...ooh. Maybe I can somehow repost it to one that's actually called 'deleterius'? It'd make it much easier to find, and it would make my journal worksafe again...that's a thought.
Anyway. Fortunately, I have a worksafe alternative (er, so long as you don't then browse the site, though that's also true of FFN to a slightly milder degree): AO3, or Archive of Our Own. For some reason, they have a tool that converts LJ posts into AO3 stories. It's kind of useful. To my sorrow, it doesn't work with FFN, which is where most of my fics are actually posted, but what can you do?
So. April 2013 AFD mission, wherein agents are cats and a Disentangler is called in. The only swearing there is one instance of 'Flaming Denethor', as far as I can see. No sexual references that I remember seeing, either.
Next, T'Zar's Reassignment, which is the 2014 AFD interlude and also links to the real interlude (very worksafe, just has two agents meeting each other for the first time). It has one mild swearword and...Captain Jack Harkness, so there's your passing reference to sex /sigh/. It's basically an...implication? A mild suggestion? It's not crass or overt, just him being a flirt, which...yeah, more or less unavoidable. He does then make out with Ianto for a while, which then becomes a bit of a running joke. It's not described in detail, though.
And then we have this year's AFD story, which is the Carrot Juice Shop AU (and should probably be put on the wiki). No swearing, I don't remember or see any references to sex, and this is literally just fluff.
I'd also add the next interlude I post, which I shall do reasonably soon. It's also extremely worksafe, hopefully funny, and not exactly the usual sort of PPC story...well, no, it sort of is, but...well, you'll see. It's inspired by something hS said, and is not a mission. It's also got the continuity of using agents who appear in the AFD stories :)
Hope that helps!
~DF
Don't have a link handy, but they're all listed on the Wiki under either my name, or Jof, Mohan, or Lyn.
Okay, first up: Original Series. Can't go wrong with those.
First mission
Second mission
Marvin and Printworthy seems like another good choice.
The Lost Land is a great example of some of your work as well
Selene and Dafydd in "More Than Ordinary"
The same in Brown DragonRider of Pern
With some editing, "He Was Practically Asking For It" could potentially work, but might be iffy.
This is just a start - I'll be adding more in replies when I have some more free time. I've got your back, Ixi! :)
All of those, definitely... well, except the last. Considering the source material is centered around homosexual slurs and a tnirteen year-old porn star, I'm sure that would go over like a ton of bricks.
Anyway, have some more for you.
"Flamingos" is a fantastic example of your stuff, and has some very good statements by Rina about modesty and avoidance of alcohol.
I know you don't consider it as a part of your best work, but The Sue of Many Names could be a good candidate if you tone down the language.
Actually, your first few missions would probably be best.
If you're looking for worldbuilding-type stuff, something like The Canon Nursery School could be a great showcase. Short, but sweet.
Or, perhaps something from the DoSAT would be a good showcase.
And finally, Origins.
I think that should about cover it - lots of examples, and all of them suitably clean!
Allow me to leave my opinion of her to the side for the moment.
Most of my missions that aren't to NSFW fics will do. Nothing I do is more racy than accidental contact with Kala or Gabby's chest.
Yes, she's overzealous and overprotective and overbearing, but she's still a nice lady and my mom. I just gotta play her game and placate her, is all.
And then once I'm older I'll sic her on Rose Potter and tell her I wrote it when I was seventeen. XD
Hearing about your mother just makes my skin crawl.
Regardless, like I said, most of my missions are work- and brain-safe. Just... don't show her the League of Legends one. That fic was a nightmare, and Valon went completely ballistic.
Look, I know I complain about her a lot, but you don't know her and don't get to judge her based off her teenage daughter's teenage-y whininess.
I don't talk enough about all the good stuff she's done, like acting as my D&D group's DM and making epic storylines, or taking me and my friends out paintballing (and single-handedly winning one round), or helping me make my awesome Harry Potter cosplay, or building a rack for my wand collection, or teaching me how to sew, or taking us to the renaissance fair and cheering me on in the archery contest, or helping me get around the house when I threw out my back and couldn't sit up on my own let alone walk.
You don't know her, so you don't get to make comments like that. My mom's crazy overprotective and drives me nuts at times, but she's been a great mom and I love her. So. There.
I'll just be over here, then...
Nice going, Voyd, you made her mad. Why'd you say that, you bleeding moron.
Presenting (Un)Intelligence: tales from that one department which is super-important but that people tend to overlook.
Room-flooding, Patronus-casting, clothes-laundering, foreveralone-gaming, lonely funeral action that's guaranteed G-rated. Bring your kids!
I should really continue that series. Yeah.
It'll definitely dissuade her of the notion that the PPC is nothing but missions. Thanks!
We get to do the fun things in the background. DoI, Cafeteria, DMS, Nursery, Building Maintenance, New Caledonia, you name it, Infrastructure (or Security) can explore it.
Man, I gotta get Farilan out and about sometime...