Want some holy napalm? by
LonelyStar
on 2015-02-14 02:18:00 UTC
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For the book, I mean. It's homemade, so not of the best quality, but still it's more thorough than just plain holy water. It should serve you well if you ever come by Fifty Shades in a setting where it's legal for you to destroy it utterly.
Be warned, though, it's nigh on impossible to get the residue off concrete. I've still got a blotch on my front walk from when I last used it.
Yes, the book is bad and all who touch it should feel bad. by
World-Jumper
on 2015-02-13 21:15:00 UTC
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That said, I think the whole thing is hilarious! Not the book, never read it, but the whole idea that there will be a mainstream movie about it, with thousands of people watching not-so-softcore porn in theaters is ridiculous! Especially with the corniness of the book it's based off of.
I guarantee you, when the Rifftrax folks get their hands on it, I will be watching them ripping it to hell and back.
Now, to help calm yourselves, and make all things in the world better, have Team Four Star and the Nostalgia Critic himself read it in various voices. NSFW, obviously.
Yet despite all the below by
Huinesoron
on 2015-02-13 20:40:00 UTC
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(and doubtless above, by this time tomorrow), it was actually showing up in TV adverts over Christmas. Not, like, for itself, or handcuffs or whatever - there was an advert for a supermarket or TV channel or somesuch which featured Dear Old Granny reading it in the corner.
Which, um. Yeah.
(You'll be glad to hear that - according to a certain Huinesoron - Acacia doesn't think it's very good)
hS
My English class today was in an uproar about the movie. by
Iximaz
on 2015-02-13 20:39:00 UTC
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Keep in mind that this is a high school class, but that didn't seem to concern anyone when at least eight girls said they couldn't wait to see the movie. Apparently they're going for Valentine's Day, to which I say: Bleargh.
But no, it's not just the kids! Even my teacher says she enjoyed the book. Normally I'd start crying about this, but... I constantly have to correct her grammar (she can't seem to keep your/you're straight) and she didn't know the meaning of apathetic. "A hatred for something".
Um, no.
So the book was bad enough, but the fact that everyone seems so excited for a movie just scares me.
If you need me, I'll be in my bunker.
Nothing against erotica, but... by
Calista
on 2015-02-13 19:39:00 UTC
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I tend to agree with you, and for the same reason I don't like Twilight--it pretty much turns a woman into a passive object.
I've read a little about the kinky whips-and-chains thing some people like (hey, I'm asexual and I was curious), and the one thing I see all the time is people saying that the point of it is for everyone involved to enjoy it. It's pretend. No one's actually enslaved, or forced, or whatever. I don't want to go further than that because let's keep it PG-13, yeah? But this is a voluntary thing that people do because they like it.
But Fifty Shades of Gray seems to ignore all that in favor of... uh... basically romanticizing stockholm syndrome. Or near to it--at least, implying that it's romantic to actually be powerless, as opposed to pretending while you get it on with your partner. It's the same thing as Twilight.
If it were PWP, I don't think people would be so disgusted by it, but it apparently makes an attempt at characterization and story--and fails badly at both.
I feel for you. by
Desdendelle
on 2015-02-13 17:15:00 UTC
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I haven't read it, but there's this very thorough MST of it by Astral Void, and if half of what I read is true... ew. Just, ew.