Subject: I know!
Author:
Posted on: 2015-01-30 19:29:00 UTC
And it's deliberately silly, too—because how can the heroine look cool unless her enemies are rendered completely ridiculous, right?
For the dragon's sake, I can only hope it's "smut" in the sense of "soot" and that it sounds a lot more impressive in Sindarin. {X D
~Neshomeh
It seems that the author is transplanting the Pevensies to USA despite them being British. I do not realise if there are a significant minority of Japanese in UK by that time, and how well they integrate. But calling a Japanese Jap is rather American to me.
Also, Peter gets himself recruited during WW2, and the Pevensies are staying with their uncle and aunt. If this story is WW1, I don't remember Japan being a significant player in the war.
Unfortunately, I can't link it (Kindle), but look up "Darekesst DAERKNESS" (sic) on FFnet, if you're familiar with Jojo's Bizarre Adventure.
It reads so much like My Immortal that it's hardy even funny, there are tons of minis (what would a JJBA mini be anyway?), Dio is replaced, and the Sue obviously just stuck "Jo" in front of her name to be a JoJo.
...yeah, obvious troll is obvious.
Does he count as a Canon Stu, by the PPC definition?
He honestly seems like a Stu that exploits his nature. He has a troubled past, his deaths are tragic or dramatic, he gets away with quite a lot when Joestars aren't involved, he has several story breaker powers, and he even seems to have an Aura of Smooth.
It's like he knows he has Stu powers and he actively uses them as a villain.
Or maybe I'm just seeing the sparkles that permeate the JoJoverse by default.
While we're on this topic, I might as well announce my first claim for DIC:
Criminal MindsSSBB: Reckoning by SkyleafAlchemist19
After an attack on the Smashers, Pit finds himself trapped on Earth, in the care of the BAU team. A series of public attacks points to the same obscure group, who seem to have a vendetta against Earth and the Multiverse. With the Smashers on the run and the team unable to trust their superiors, both groups struggle to unite against an army that threatens them all.
Rated: Fiction T - English - Adventure/Suspense - Pit, Marth, Jennifer J./JJ, S. Reid - Chapters: 7 - Words: 21,981 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 19 - Updated: Sep 12, 2013 - Published: Nov 30, 2012 - id: 8751185
My comment: I honestly have mixed feelings about this thing. On the one hand, the characterization is actually pretty good - most of the time, anyway - for such a... strange mashup. But on the other, you've got people angsting because they think Pit is dead, an idiot ball on Zelda's part, uncanonical locations, an uncanonical main antagonist faction, and the Smash Bros. multiverse somehow including the Earth that the Criminal Minds continuum takes place in as an "off-limits" zone. And the fic itself has been left hanging since 2013.
Considering that my upcoming DIC team is gonna include that Not!Pit guy I'm recruiting from my Kid Icarus mission, the one tackling this fic will be... interesting, to say the least.
I found one like those, too.
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10955069/1/WARNING (Free!)
"I love you" How endearing and dangerous can 3 little words really be? Do they have the power to make people do things they never thought they would do? Do they have the power to change? Do they even have the power to... kill? / Yandere!Makoto x OC
--What in the name of every water god could possibly justify making Makoto a yandere?! Makoto! The most selfless, loyal, friendly character in the main cast! (Well, Nagisa's pretty friendly too, but that's not the point.) And another thing--OBSESSION/PSYCHOSIS IS NOT ATTRACTIVE, FOR GOD'S SAKE PEOPLE. *Marge Simpson noise*
I was about five pages into a mission of Heir of Sky's Rimwhen I realized over half the complaints were directed at the author. So I dropped the mission and now bring the badfic to you.
No, it's not Skyrim, it's Minecraft. The Ender Dragon turns into an enderman and goes on a quest to retrieve her soul? I think? The sentence structure is atrocious, but that's not the worst part.
The author included little gems like Time jump, the scene was boring as a scene break. During a fight scene. Seriously.
And let's not get started on the massive influx of submitted OCs, the game the author started with the readers (points were given for spotting errors, but the author didn't fix said errors to give new readers a chance to catch up), and did I mention the sentence structure? Holy cow, the sentence structure.
"Secrets of the Void", by Generatedname, rated T. Warframe x Mass Effect.
Well. Classic "SI falls into canon X". Immediately gets ultra speshul by somehow becoming a Low Guardian and taking control of the Technocyte Plague (which are, uncanonically, the same thing or something), which means bye-bye conflict of Warframe. Probably an OP Stu.
I've no idea what this... abomination... does to the ME-verse because I've only read a few paragraphs from the first chapter.
I kinda want to use it as some kind of origin story for my characters, but I'm not even sure whether or not I want to write missions, so...
Dumbing Down
By: FieryFilly
An insane Trixie is going to make Twilight love her no matter how drastic the measure. Just a quick story I cooked up
Rated: Fiction T - English - Horror/Romance - Twilight Sparkle, Trixie - Words: 2,036 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 15 - Published: Jan 8, 2012 - id: 7722178
My comment: Yeah, uh, I'd say brain surgery is probably more difficult than that. Also, what?
I have only read a few paragraphs, and already I have whiplash. That had one of the quickest mood switches I have ever read. It started off as a Cupcakes ripoff (of which I have read far too many) and then... Trixie drops the love bomb on us!
What?
And then it goes into creepy-Cpucakes-love potion thing, what?
This fic is... interesting. I will leave it for others for now, but I may consider it for much later, if it is still available.
At this time, Trixie sees Twilight as the source of her humiliation. Not as a potential lover (or someone to foalnap, mind rape, and intellectually disable)! And furthermore, it's a wonder there's still an Equestria at the time of the chapter's end!
"The Empty Vessel" by ZeeDrippyVessel.
Tungsten Monk and I have already claimed this beast, but I wanted to share, because that's how much I love you all. {; P This absurdly long story is about Bronwyn Morgan ap Powell, a modern woman with a perfect hourglass figure and fiery-yet-vulnerable personality who is shanghaied to Middle-earth by the Valar, but only once they've thoroughly ruined her life so she can become the titular Empty Vessel. What does this mean? Well, apparently it's her destiny to have lots of hot sex with Haldir and also become the "Bard of All Earth" or something like that, storing up all the history of Middle-earth in her head for thousands of years... so she can psychically dictate it to none other than J.R.R. Tolkien, who is implied to be one of her descendents. I cannot make an emoticon with a deep enough scowl to properly express my indignation at this.
Along the way, she discovers the power to make music play in the air around her, subjecting the poor Galadhrim to a lot of 80s rock. Not that there's anything wrong with 80s rock, mind you, but I can't imagine that the Elves appreciate it, and it certainly wasn't written for the lute.
Enter, if you dare, and marvel at the illogic, the disrespect for canon, the defamation of the Valar, and the random insertion of things like Smut the Dragon and the speshul wolves that become the companions of Bronwyn, Haldir, and their speshul spawn. Not to mention a scene in chapter 22 where Haldir assures her she's not a Mary Sue, completely not getting what a Mary Sue actually is. {X D
I also suspect there's some butchery of Elven languages going on, but I have not the wisdom to confirm it (yet).
~Neshomeh
LotR dragons would either kill Jackie outright or toy with his mind and then either kill him or drive him to suicide when of no further use!
"HEY! You come up with a better one!"
So, better songs about dragons published before 2003: go! {= D
To start, I just found The Emerald Sword Saga, five albums released from 1997-2002, which has a dragon called Tharos in the second one. I'm gonna go see if I can listen to this somewhere.
~Neshomeh
And I mean besides going for some of the more overused Welsh names, I suppose at least its not Jones I guess...
Also what century is the Sue from? IIRC Welsh names like that didn't last into the last century, also the name itself is totally wrong, 'ap' used like that in a name means 'Son of' so its the wrong gender to start with, plus there should probably be only one name in front of the 'ap' anyway.
Storme Hawk
Who probably shouldn't still be awake right now.
(Cymru am byth)
The fic was published in 2003 and she references a lot of stuff from the 80s and 90s, so I assume she's from the 20th/21st century. Her maiden name was Bronwyn Morgan, and she married a guy named Ramsey ap Powell, so she became Bronwyn Morgan ap Powell. I don't know if that makes it better or worse. {= P
~Neshomeh
It appears that Powell is actually a fixed surname that came into use in Wales after the patronymic naming system started to disappear, being a shortened form of 'ap Hywel', so essentially the husband's name is Ramsey son of son of Hywel, which is obviously incorrect.
I suppose, however if such a surname were to exist, with the current naming system, someone could take it as there surname, although where the double barreled bit would come in I'm not sure. I can't currently find too much on what happened in the old Welsh system about what happened when women married, but I think the kept their surname of 'ferch "father"', but I'm no sure that helps in this case.
Storme Hawk
On the one hand, she didn't deliberately mangle Welsh naming conventions by attempting to name herself 'son of' anyone.
On the other hand, she unintentionally used a patronymic as a surname in a context which doesn't allow for that.
Toss a coin... yep, turns out it's terrible research either way.
(Storme Hawk - is there a female equivalent to 'ap' for use in names? The only place I've run across them is historical usage, and for some reason the tales of the likes of Llywelyn ap Gruffudd don't talk about women much... imagine. ^_~)
hS
At "Smut the Dragon". Excuse me while I laugh helplessly on the floor.
And it's deliberately silly, too—because how can the heroine look cool unless her enemies are rendered completely ridiculous, right?
For the dragon's sake, I can only hope it's "smut" in the sense of "soot" and that it sounds a lot more impressive in Sindarin. {X D
~Neshomeh
>:V
>:U
>:-[
...yeah, none of them really are enough, are they? Holy cow, that's crazy stuff.