Subject: Hrm.
Author:
Posted on: 2014-12-25 22:21:00 UTC
Before we begin, my usual disclaimer: I apologize if my opinions and points seem to be presented harshly. My intention is neither to belittle nor insult.
This story... this story is not good. I am struggling to think of anything that I liked, which is not what my reaction should be after reading a PPC fic.
First off, there's the OFU itself. It bothers me that you seem to have just created an OFU with which you intend to do nothing. It is especially bothersome since you made this OFU so broad in its scope (despite it supposedly being just about Disney Infinity, which I will get to in a second). If canon-specific OFUs can just supplant it, then why does it need to exist in the first place? Disney has no shared overarching canon. What benefit does this provide to these smaller fanfiction schools?
I must also protest your use of Disney Infinity for one major reason. The game might not have a lot of canon to it, but there is one important point that you have either forgotten or not researched. The characters in Disney Infinity are not canonical transplants. They did not jump universes. They're toys. Literally. That's the central focus of the game. That's why all the levels are based off of toy boxes and why the characters fall to pieces when they run out of health. It therefore makes no sense that the original canonical characters would go to teach at this OFU (expect maybe the Toy Story characters). You also included characters who are not actually part of the Disney Infinity line like Tiana. I suppose that ties into the "all-purpose OFU" excuse.
That bothered me a lot when I read through this the first time, and it took me a few minutes to figure out why. Ignoring or overlooking key canonical details for the benefit of your own characters or plot is something that happens in badfic.
I'm not even sure why this needed to be a crossover at all. Very few of the Disney characters outside of those from The Incredibles, Frozen, and Tangled did anything. Mickey Mouse was pretty much entirely ignored, which is weird since he literally is the face of Disney. His speeches were bushed off in a couple of sentences.
Some of the canonicals felt OOC at times. Elsa and Anna seemed the most prone to this (although that could be because I saw Frozen most recently of any Disney film). Wh would Elsa care about statues? I don't recall that particular aspect of her character.
Finally, and perhaps most importantly, I didn't see the point of this story. Your characters didn't seem to develop in any significant way apart from what I felt was a very weak token lesson about respect at the very end. Stories need to have a point; something that drives the characters and invests the audience. This whole fic just seemed to be a excuse to have your characters interact with certain members of the Disney canon. If that was indeed the point, then color me a little concerned.
This is a weak effort, all in all. I know you're capable of better.
PoorCynic