Subject: I used to think "crack" meant "not canon-compliant"
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Posted on: 2016-05-10 04:14:00 UTC
So I have stories floating around labeled "crack" that are realistic modern AUs, realistic secret agent AUs, and one thing that I think is just slash. *shakes head* I need to go clean all that up.
Yes, I know, this is another short one. In my defense, the source material was only a chapter long, but it was Bad.
Ix and Lottie get a Frozen "crackfic" that is anything but.
I thought this would be more cringey than it was.
I mean, poorly done drama, or what have you is usually hilarious, right?
Poorly done comedy, satire and whatnot... isn't.
I would know, I'm very familiar with poorly done comedy.
You delivered it well, is all I'm saying. This must've been hell to read.
That sexophone joke. Eugh.
Conspicuous enough to be clearly for comedy, not structured enough to be even remotely funny.
Charlotte being made of stone: is that a sparklepire thing, or is it something from her native badfic?
It's never explicitly said in canon what material it is they're made of but they're frequently described as being like marble (you know... indestructible, sparkling marble...) and when we see one of the sparklepires get her head ripped off and later dismembered, there was no blood, just the sound of rocks being broken. Are they actually made of stone? I don't think so, but it's certainly close enough.
considering that there's an entire collection of skin diseases based on the hardening of certain bits of skin.
You know, hard.
Like stone.
Even if it does enable you to fly.
hS
Ix and Charlotte are right, the 'crack' is only a weak excuse for not getting any flak... Flak well-deserved with the story only talking about Elsa's chest.Now, if short means a daily mission, I could live with that... Kidding, just write the way it feels right for you. And don't worry, quality is still here for you, just as its lack is a constant in badfic.
People slap it on bad writing and go "lol it doesn't have to be good because crack!!1one!" >.> I have read good crack. It's flipping hilarious. This was boring, too realistic for something claiming to be crack, and just augh. It wasn't even bad crack, it was just... bad. But I ranted enough about that in the mission.
And sorry, but the next one's going to be a bit longer: a Percy Jackson fic where it turns out he has three sisters, all daughters of Poseidon.
Yep. Three.
*vomits*
So I have stories floating around labeled "crack" that are realistic modern AUs, realistic secret agent AUs, and one thing that I think is just slash. *shakes head* I need to go clean all that up.
Feel free to chuck 'em at us. You seem talented and we could use another goodfic thread. =]
One's his twin, one's their younger sister (aged eight IIRC) and one who's older and their half sister.
Oh, and the story is plagiarized out the wazoo.
Linky. Read at your own risk.
Clearly, I can't stomach bad fanfic.
Eh, I didn't read The Lightning Thief for a long time, but is that blatant, and almost complete, plagiarization from chapter one? With Sister one stealing the spotlight and bashing her brother?
Ave and Zeb sure know how to get all the fun.
Do you look for plagiarism badfics, or were you just (un)lucky with this one?
I was just derping through for a good PJO fic that would hold my interest and this one was a real gem if you ask me. The worst offender, though, would have to be chapter five, when it strays off the beaten path... hoo boy.
Mission's already partially written anyway.
That's probably one of the most unpleasant badfics I've ever been exposed to. Bizarre, but not bizarre enough to have the distancing effect that makes crack funny. Your agents'observations were spot on. I'm also really enjoying seeing them develop. Ix is kind of reminding me of a Lighter and Softer version of Gabrielle, but maybe that's because I was just rereading her spinoff. I don't mean to imply you're repeating yourself; Ix is clearly her own character.
I'm going to have the song exorcism stuck in my head all day now. Thanks.
--Key
This one was definitely bizarre, but I wouldn't say it was unpleasant. At least, there was nothing squicky (for me) in it, just a boatload of annoyances.
Ix being like Gabrielle, I'm not too sure about. Gabrielle is a Stepford Smiler—she hides her pain behind a façade of bubbly happiness. With Ix, what you see is what you get; even though she had traumatic stuff happen to her, she had support in her family and at Hogwarts so she never had the time to develop the angst that was scheduled for her later in the fic she came from.
I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves, everybody's nerves! I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves and this is how it goes for-ev-er...
It was more that they felt like the same kind of jumpy. They're both quick to assume that their partners hate them, for instance, and generally have a sort of twitchiness about them.
But as I said, I just finished reading that spinoff, and now I'm seeing Doktors and Gabrielles everywhere.
Also, I was very deeply squicked by that fic and you are very luck you weren't. *groans*
They're both skittish about upsetting other people because of the obvious reasons. :)
And ugh, sorry you were squicked by that. I... probably shouldn't point you in the direction of HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, then. It's a lot worse than this.
It's absolutely terrible, but I still think it's absolutely hilarious.
You covered everything, it was entertaining - I like the fact that you're making use of Charlotte's species - it didn't need to be ten miles long.
My one question is: was there anything that actually made it a Frozen fic other than the names?
hS