Subject: This is still my favorite.
Author:
Posted on: 2016-03-24 22:56:00 UTC
"Do not meddle in the affairs of assassins! They are heavily armed and quick to anger. And not noticeably subtle."
So far as I know it's not technically from a mission, but it just perfectly sums up the PPC to me. Fandom, humour, and a love of all things weaponry. Plus, it holds a special place in my heart for being one of the first things I read when I found the PPC.
I was wondering if anyone had any really great quotes from any of the PPC missions that they just loved.
"Do not meddle in the affairs of assassins! They are heavily armed and quick to anger. And not noticeably subtle."
So far as I know it's not technically from a mission, but it just perfectly sums up the PPC to me. Fandom, humour, and a love of all things weaponry. Plus, it holds a special place in my heart for being one of the first things I read when I found the PPC.
"I punched that cat in the face one time, people! ONE! TIME!"
(SkarmorySilver)
"You forgot 'mass goblin sex.'"
"I said unspeakable acts in Moria. Unspeakable, as in should not be spoken of ever again."
"WHY IS THE POOP THERE?"
That mission was the funniest I've ever been. Ix and I knocked it out of the park on that one, and I've never quite reached the same heights. The writing was natural, the agents had real chemistry, it just... worked. It worked really, really well.
Ein Frohliche Weihnachten mit Doktor Trollenfisch und Gabrielle is the best mission I've ever written, mostly because I was working with, to say nothing of inspired by, one of my best friends. It's my favourite line because it reminds me of the wonderful time I had working on that fic, and who knows? Maybe I'll write something as good again.
One day. =]
But just imagine if Odin came down and said 'Honestly, I'm a nobhead and I have no idea what I'm doing.'
You might be able to relate with how me, and a whole bunch of other people feel, right now.
*salutes*
*bows*
*attempts to wash feet*
With a line like that, I think we can excuse a little bit of narcissism.
I still maintain that my very first mission is my best work so far, but my absolute favorite line from any of my missions? Three words, just three beautiful words...
"RELEASE THE KRAKEN!!!"
(Mind you, it isn't just the line itself that's important, but rather who is delivering it - and Voyd and I agree that this line alone pretty much hammers home the fact that even though she's basically a nervous wreck most of the time, Lapis will do anything to avenge her allies and can be freaking TERRIFYING if pushed too far.)
"It's happened again." Jay leaned back from her console, indicating a flashing red light. "Someone's mucking with the plot continuum."
The famous line that started the entire community. I was hooked the instant I read it.
Not a single quote, but a whole dialog.
"You claimed to create God. You realize that God created the universe, right?"
"Duh."
"And you're part of the universe, so God created you, right?"
She nodded.
"But you created God. You're the Mother of God—and don't give me any BS about a physical incarnation. You gave birth to God's 'true form'. She said so, remember? So, how could God create the universe, and yourself, if she didn't exist yet?"
"I . . . she . . . what?"
"You heard me. Explain how you can exist if God created the universe, but you only now created God."
"I create God, then God creates the universe at the beginning of time and creates me so I can create her! It's a stable time loop!"
"Wrong! If Elaine is present at the beginning of the universe, that negates the causality loop requiring her to be born now. If she's already there at the beginning of time, she doesn't lie dormant 'waiting for the perfect match to find each other'. If that doesn't happen, you don't give birth to her. If you don't give birth to her, she doesn't exist, and neither do you. The loop collapses, and you—both of you—cease to be."
The two looked at each other.
"Oh dear," said Rachel.
"I hadn't thought of that," said Elaine.
Both of them promptly vanished in a puff of logic.
Supernumerary, killing glitterbags and 'gods' with logic.
And for bonus points, the first part of it:
"Shut up! You've played the helpless victim card so hard I doubt you could even touch me." And then inspiration struck, and he grinned. "In fact, I know you can't. You just gave birth. It's taken a lot out of you. You're in a lot of pain, and your muscles are about as useful as cooked spaghetti right now."
And it was true. The world received its instructions and, because they were spoken with conviction and made perfect sense, took them to heart.
"Get out! The power of Tolkien compels you!"
Get out!
Get out!
Get out!
The power of Tolkien compels you!
The cry echoed across the whole of Middle-earth, and the ground rippled in agony as the 'Sue fought to remain in her rocky hideout. Against the force of so much Canon, however, she didn't stand a chance. With one final earthquake, powerful enough to knock almost all the agents off their feet, the form of Alumia the Woodsprite appeared, screaming.
When all of the PPC is going after your head it's hardly getting more awesome.
Oh wait, here's a good contender.
Voldemort remained poised, ready to strike should his enemy get back up. Then he began to laugh, a high, cruel noise that made the hairs on the back of both agents’ necks stand on end. “At long last, Rose Potter is dead! Lord Voldemort has won!”
Wrong by two deaths, but you somethng is amiss about a character when you cheer for Voldemort.
I agree, if I hate Rose Potter enough to like Voldemort, that really says something about Rose Potter. Though it only says one of many things that I would like to say about her.
... then I will always come back to this one:
~
Alex was screaming "The Song that Never Ends" at the top of her lungs through the prison bars (somehow set in wood and mud) when the assassins came along. She finally subsided, and sat down. Suddenly, a dark and sinister voice drifted out of the gloom...
"Mr. Socko doesn't like people walking out on his lectures."
"You're that elf from Rivendell, aren't you?" Alex demanded. "The one who kept talking about cheese!"
"I am not. I am... MR. SOCKO!!" Two sets of glowing bobble eyes regarded her out of the gloom.
"And I am Millie," said the second sock.
"Jay, be mature," said Acacia, stepping out of the darkness.
"Look, I haven't said a wohd," Jay said. "If you have problems with Constables Millie and Socko, take it up with Upstairs."
"You ARE the cheese elf from Rivendell!"
Jay grinned. "In my native language, luv, DUH."
(TOS 8: Why Am I Here?)
~
Agents Millie and Socko are the best agents and I won't hear a word to the contrary. There's a reason I wrote this story...
hS
That's some fantastic dialog. Doesn't really matter that it's not a single quote when the entire thing is that excellent. Which mission is it from?
From Neshomeh's mission to "Ring Child." It describes what we do pretty well, and it's also quite awesome. :D
It's concise, dramatic, and the perfect quote. Congrats to all involved!
I wish I could think of some good lines to share in return. I'm sure there must be some gems in, e.g., Trojie & Pads' and Tungsten Monk's missions, but I can't think of anything specific. I'm bad at that sort of thing. {= (
~Neshomeh
I guess the only recourse is to read ALL of your missions and sort the best quotes out. But hey, if we don't do it, who will?
"You are condemned to live with the elves forever." Jay grinned ferally.
Breaking the rules was so worth it.