July, you are the big sister I never had and I love you dearly. I hope that you will eventually return, even if that's not likely to happen. I will try to keep in touch and I hope that you know that you do have people who care about you here.

Both in a general sympathy sense, that you're leaving, and in the sense that I held onto a grudge for far, far too long, and in indulging it, helped poison the well against you. I'm sure, despite not being in the logs, some of the ugly feeling about you could be traced back to things I've said.

On a more selfish note, I'm sad because I was hoping to rebuild some kind of a friendship, and though I hope you'll be willing to keep talking, it kind of sucks to lose your voice here just as I was hoping to reconnect.

At any rate, I wish you the best of luck in your life going forward.

And July stepped into her private boat and waved goodbye
and sailed back over a year
and in and out of weeks
and through a day
and into the night of her very own room
where she found her supper waiting for her.

And it was still hot.

hS

According to your wish, the story of how Hieronymus the hermit became a part-time knight will never be told.

Fare well.

HG

I was far too passive during the events on the chat, and the fact they disturbed me should have prompted me to act more, not stay away.

I wish you well for the future.

I do not know wether you are going to read this post or not, but in case you are, I want to apologize to you.

Even though I did not post as much as others during the incident, I am still guilty, like every other person present at the time, of not stepping in. Yes, emotions were running high. Still, that does not excuse the fact that I did not take a step back and did not realize what kind of action was being discussed. Instead all I said was that I was "not sure" about posting the picture on the board.

I know how hypocritical it comes off to apologize so late, but I both wanted to take a few step backs and think about what I was going to say, and go through the chat logs so I knew exactly what happened and what was being said, and what I did. Emotions can cloud the memoryjust like they cloud the judgement, and I did not want to make the mistake of letting that be the case this time.

Once again I apologize to you. I can understand your decision to leave, especially after this incident, and I cannot and have no right to try and stop you.

~Akrinor

(I've said a lot of this stuff to July, but I think it needs to be out here)

Outing someone's real name on the Internet without consent like I did in a moment of complete idiocy is wrong in all circumstances, but now it seems that this case was worse than most.

It appears that my belief (stated in another post) that none of us would want July killed isn't (or used to not be) true. That means that my posting in the Discord could have actually had a decent chance of ... f**k. I didn't know about any of the history until yesterday afternoon, but that's no excuse. I f**ked up real bad there, and I wish I could go back in time and slap myself silly.

Now, I have to ask. Did anyone who was participating in chat at the time know about this stuff, especially the death threats? If so, I'm surprised that I didn't get any calls to "DELETE THAT NOW" or similar, either in chat or privately, from someone who knew the full potential consequences of my actions. I assure you, I would've listened.

These are the first words that I mean to direct at you since the incident I've caused, and now so it happens those shall also be the last. I know you hate me, and you have the full right to do so, but for that one final time I would like to get your attention:

I have no excuses for my behaviour, both this one and almost six months ago. I didn't do anything to prevent the mob from rising, I let my emotional attachment overtake me, and for that I will accept any punishment the community should impose onto me. The previous time I acted high-and-mighty, tried to force my way of thinking onto you, and completely ignored your decisions, all while under the delusion of being a friend.

Truth be told, I am still grateful to you for what you did back in 2015 for me. You are honest, direct, and no-nonsense to the absolute maximum, but whether you are a bully or not... that's not for me to say, and I shouldn't build my opinion based on the events I wasn't there for.

I will not repeat my mistake and will not even think about stopping you from leaving. What we did put you in potential danger and as much as I would like for us to part ways with at least neutral relationship, that's unfortunately nothing I can do about anymore.

So, to sum up, if any of this has any worth to you anymore: I am sorry, JulyFlame, for all this messed up stuff I've put you through.

There's no point in trying to make a long post explaining myself because I know nothing I say can ever make up for what I did. It was wrong, it was stupid, and it was horrible of me to say what I did and cause this to happen to you.

Take care.