Subject: Happy birthday!
Author:
Posted on: 2017-01-12 05:18:00 UTC
Since it appears to have rained in some areas today, here's a magical umbrella to shield you from rain, or snow, or bullets, or projectiles of any sort, really.
I'm now 22, which is one step closer to qualifying as a grown-ass woman. All I ask is that it not rain today.
Yipe! I haven't been aBoard for quite a while, and I missed your birthday! I'm so sorry!
OTL
Happy (belated) birthday!
It rained today, but it was a pleasant rain, and it was warm, so it all evens out in the end.
Wait for a moment, a truck filled of black-hole coffee and chocolate should arrive near your house soon. If not, tell me. We cannot have lousy employees, eh?
Congratulations on reaching the repeating twos!
Here, have an apple cinnamon bun from my oven! I can even send you the picture of it if you wish!
Oh, by the way, did you get my email? It's been ten days.
Please send me a picture of that apple cinnamon bun, it sounds delicious :)
Alright then, a poorly lighted picture of the bun is coming your way!
Since it appears to have rained in some areas today, here's a magical umbrella to shield you from rain, or snow, or bullets, or projectiles of any sort, really.
Here, have a miniature Carnufex carolinensis. You deserve it, my friend. :D
It's a bipedal proto-crocodile, which is somehow even more terrifying, and its name means Butcher.
hS, spreading paleological terror where'er he goes
Incredible!
Unbelievable!
Incomprehensible!
Grown-ass woman scans detect an 89% increase in grown-ass womanry in the local area!
Congratulations!
My gift upon you is: one of those goofy-looking umbrella hat thingos. In case it rains, or you feel like you just look a little too fashionable and want to tone it down a few hundred levels.
Happy grown-ass woman day!
Happy birthday, buddy-girl! Huh, looks like you're a year younger than me, huh? Well... For two months at least we're the same age :D
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
J: Have a deck of [Generic TCG] Cards!
W: And this totally-not-suspicious-at-all spoon!
HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
MAY ALL YOUR WISHES COME TRUE
HOPE NOBODY MAKES YOU BLUE
AND YOUR CAKE DOESN'T EXPLODE IN GOO!
*blows noisemakers*
Thanks! I'm sure I'll think of something to do with these...probably not involving pizza, though. Not gonna step anywhere near that minefield. ;)