Subject: Oh! Another Elder Squirrels fan!
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Posted on: 2016-12-24 01:10:00 UTC

Tell me, my friend, which one was your favourite?
Was it Squirrelrim, perhaps? Where the gameplay involved eating everything in sight, to build up fat to survive the cold?
Squirrelblivion? I wasn't too fond of that, and all the acorns looked too blurry.
Or how about Squirrelwind?
Or maybe you like the classics? Elder Squirrels Squirena? Squirrelfall?

Well, I know exactly what gift to give you! I bestow upon you: a squirrel-sized mallet. For breaking open those acorns, without munting your teeth! Yeah!

Welcome, mate. The legion of sarcastic ponces who don't ultimately add all that much gladly welcomes you in!

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