This was a well-written mission. Even though I was not intimately familiar with all four continua, I was able to follow the mission.

Errors:
“Vi?” asked Lapis. Then a cross-vein appeared on her head. “Sarah, did you seriously —”

“No connection, none at all!” Sarah had her hands raised, her expression exactly as one would expect from a girl staring down a mouthful of teeth like a great white shark. “Cupid’s ex, remember? You saw her at the Gift Exchange this past January.”
What beef does Lapis have against Vi? Especially given this following quote:

I’m guessing she’s the one who invited me and Ami?”

“Yeah, that’s me. I’m Lapis Lazuli, pronounced Lay-pis La-ZOO-lee.
Did Lapis invite Vi or not?


“I’m not exactly happy about this either, Lapis,” Aiko replied, glaring right back at her childhood rival. “I wasn’t aware that you would be here with either. If I had been, I would probably have reconsidered.”

That word doesn't belong.


happened fifty thousand, seven hundred and fifty years ago.

According to the Steven Universe Wiki, it was 5,750 years ago, not 50,750. Or did I read the wrong page?


She grabbed Ami’s hand and ran to catch up with the Crystal Gems, currently getting Steven and the replacements to safety.

I'm guessing that it was the Gems getting Steven to safety, not Violet. Either delete the comma or add "who were" after the comma. Actually, the latter option would be clearer.

Not really knowing any of the continua involved, I had some difficulties keeping track of who’s who and which agent knows which continuum, but I finished reading eventually.

Speaking of continua and their singular:
Well, at least those of us who know whichever continua each charge applies to.
Shouldn’t this be "continuum" (singular), or may some charges actually apply to more than one?

Well, as the one who knows the continua that this chapter is focusing on.
As far as I understood, Aiko doesn’t know One Piece, Fairy Tail or Steven Universe. This should definitively be "continuum" (singular), even if the part of the badfic under discussion didn’t focus solely on Naruto.

I wouldn’t put it past the Flowers to specifically punish someone who knows a certain continua in addition for the general punishment for failing in collecting enough charges.
This should either be "a certain continuum" (singular) or just "certain continua" (plural, no "a"); and I think for should be "to".

I’m sorry, but I just can’t, not when I have cause to believe that is she only arguing against me that much because she hates me
Word order should be "she is".

Did you realize how you in the heck you could have caused THAT?!
The first you should not be there.

She’s taking the image of one of my favorite characters and twisting it while doing while doing all this mess, after all.
Too many words again.

Don’t tell me that I have witness something that amounts to torture again.
Missing word "to"? (While "have witnessed" would be grammatically correct too, I don’t belive that’s what you meant.)

Well, I don’t think we really needed it, but if there was any doubt of just how bad this is, it just went out of window right there!
Missing word "the" ("out of the window").

(I wondered whether Aiko’s speech patterns are building up to her speech becoming almost incoherent in a rage, but it doesn’t really look like this is intentional, and it continues when she’s calmed down again.)

The agents who rescued us charged us just for sake of it, but there wasn’t much aside from Anju and I just being there, so we got saved.
Missing word "the" ("for the sake of it").
Also, while "Anju and I were there" would be right and "Anju and me were there" would be a wrong use of "me" that occurs far too often, MS Word Grammar Check tells me that this should be "Anju and me just being there". (I may have learned the applicable rule ages ago, and it may have something to do with the continuous form, but I can’t really explain. English grammar is weird.)

This is job is very important for her, so she wouldn’t do anything to miss it.
The first is should not be there.

However, with her Byakugan still activate, Gem!Hinata easily noticed this and rushed over, the palm of her raised right hand glowing with chakra as she prepared to strike Aiko in return.
This should be either "active" or "activated".

... thus dodge the knife when without seeing it at first.
I’m not quite sure what you are trying to say, but "when" is probably a word that shouldn’t be there.

You know, I’m definitely happy we will probably get over all that, but don’t get wrong.
Missing word; may be "don’t get me wrong", "don’t get this wrong", "don’t get it wrong".

We don’t have to enemies to be that, after all.
Missing word "be".

So, even if we trying to nicer to each other now, I believe we still have a contest to settle.
Missing words; probably "we are trying to be nicer".

I’m glad that Lapis and Aiko will come to terms.

HG

I like that Lapis got some character development, and the interpretation of the author's note in the beginning as a sock puppet show.
Still, there's a couple of issues I have with this mission and they may be reoccurring issues in previous missions and missions some other authors have written as well.

1) Minimal description of the surroundings during the mission.

Although the badfic just states the location (I think?), the mission's surroundings aren't that much better. The mission just gives enough description to establish the surroundings and not much more than that.

Example:
Just then, the scene shifted around the agents, dropping them in another big heap. This time, they found themselves on a sandy beach, bordered by a wide selection of pastel-colored buildings.

And that was it. Even after the agents finished unpiling themselves, there was no mention of the sea breeze, no mention of the sounds of the ocean, no mention of the color of the sky, etc. Even if the location became generic because of the badfic, a description of what had become of the beach would be nice.

2) When agents are observing, it reads like an mst.

I think it's because the mission has copied-and-pasted chunks of badfic when paraphrasing would work better.

Example:
However they noticed something strange about, not only about the marking but instead of coming in pointing it was holding something.

All of them stared at it.
"Is that…" said Amethyst.
"It is." Said Pearl not knowing how to react.
"It's a white flag." Said Garnet.
"Wait… does that mean they're coming in peace?" asked Steven.
On the ship both the orange one and the lavender one stared at the white flag the ship was holding.
"This seems like a really stupid idea." Mumbled the orange one to herself.
(Then there's the reaction from the agents)

For this example, I think it would have worked better if you described the scene more like the agents are watching what the characters do. Writing the scene as just a copied passage then a response, looks to me less like the agents are actually spying on the scene and more like the agents are doing an mst, giving the feeling of not really being there even when they actually are.


I think that's all for the criticism. I know you worked very hard on the mission and I want you to know that I'm glad you had fun writing it!

Here's your replica Rose's sword back. But with a few modifications.

It now houses the innards of a Nano Saber, which means added electric damage, as long as you charge it with EU. Apart from that, it's the same old sword.

Honestly, this mission suffers from some of the same things I've noticed recurring in Skarmory's other missions: an excess of characters, a lot of backstory-dumping, and a lot of inter-character bickering. In this case, things between Lapis and Aiko are less justified than between Lapis and Backslash, which doesn't really help things. And Violet, Ami, and Seung-Li don't contribute all that much to the mission, at least in the first half, though they do gain more personality once they split up. In all honesty, the smaller groups give the characters a lot more chance to shine. On the other hand, I'm not sure that it makes sense in mission terms; you can't really have one group handle every other chapter, because they'll miss a lot of details, and charges of poor in-fic continuity will be harder to catch.

It is nice to see Lapis get called out for her behavior; I have to agree with Sarah that she spends way too much time angsting about her background. However, I think having her overcome her personal problems via magical regeneration seems a bit... cheap. Aside from the Heroic Sacrifice, which is a bit on the cliche side, she's said she's going to change, but the progress gets made without us actually seeing the character development. It's also confusing because I can't tell if this occurs before or after "Witches Get Stitches." In terms of characterization, it seems more like the latter one came first, as this one continues the trend of Lapis learning to get past her issues and disagreements, but it'd make more sense for her speech and swearing patterns to change after regeneration. (Swearing is something people usually do instinctively, so it doesn't really make sense for someone to begin swearing in a language they've just learned, unless there's some other factor at play.) Also, I'm not really sure about Lapis regaining her waterbending powers. I mean, I know they're not necessarily overpowered, they just don't really seem like a necessary power-up. It kind of feels like she's being rewarded just for making a token effort to get better. I know the Heroic Sacrifice was supposed to be the major point, but given that she recovered fairly effortlessly, it takes away some of the impact.

I did like the other characters a lot, especially Seung-Li and Violet. I'm sorry I didn't have more positive comments. It's not a bad mission or anything, and I found the action pretty easy to follow. You also did a good job explaining the Steven Universe stuff, at least.