Oh, we have safeguards for this, not to worry! by
Bernhard Bingard Bingle
on 2018-07-09 06:08:00 UTC
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No need to worry at all - us janitors can be shocking in both how fast we are all able to flee from perceived dangers, and also in how quick we all are able to turn to nearly total cowardly treason when our lives are on the line.
Indeed, each janitorial shift that has existed for more than about a month or so individually possesses at least one unique method of instantaneous escape from HQ, usually to some form of forest or alleyway somewhere, where a new life, undetected, can be hastily made.
I even knew a shift that physically tunneled a hole from their own closet right into a grotto somewhere in Switzerland, where they had already prepared a small barebones cabin, in deep preparation for exactly this kind of circumstance!
So there is no need, no need at all, to be concerned for the safety of the Janitorial Division!
Except against the burning vicissitudes of guilt, one supposes, but, well, dark pasts always do end up turning out well for us sorts, anyway, don't they?
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Aren't the Flowers That Be prepared for everything? by
61516
on 2018-07-08 20:02:00 UTC
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I would advocate a total purge of HQ using self-replicating nanobots which consume the oil to make more of themselves, then set of an EMP.