Subject: Maybe not quite Sueish, but . . .
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Posted on: 2018-05-24 15:03:00 UTC
There's a particular radio in the Small Mammals building. If it's tuned in to a station and I walk too close, my body somehow reduces the transmission to static. It's only that radio, though.
I hadn't really considered this until I read Neshomeh's post, buuuuut I kind of can eat anything and stay thin. I'm maybe not super thin—130 pounds roundabouts—but the unavoidable physical activity of my job, coupled with a naturally high metabolism, mean that I eat and eat and eat and don't gain weight. While most of my coworkers bring one thing for lunch and spend the rest of lunch break talking or on their phones, I stuff a backpack full of foods and spend the whole break cramming stuff down my throat, because if I don't get enough food down, I wind up getting weak with hunger by the end of the shift. (And while I should hypothetically have a thirty-minute lunch with two fifteen-minute breaks during the rest of the day, the zookeepers in the past collectively decided to fold the whole hour's worth of break time into the lunch break so we can spend more time together. Which is a lovely sentiment, but it also means that if I get to lunch on time, I have no time left to eat later in the day.) The food I eat is mostly meats, cheeses, and carbohydrates. Oh, and actual junk food like gummy bears, Twizzlers and chocolate, because my metabolism is so fast, it basically doesn't matter. My pre-shift breakfasts are also ridiculous—either a big bowl of spaghetti with butter and parmesan, or a plate filled with tater tots—just to make sure I can make it to lunch break without losing steam due to hunger weakness. And I hate it. I hate that I have to spend so much time (and money, but mostly the time) on something so basic and meaningless as eating. I don't enjoy eating, I don't enjoy cooking or the taste. I would literally skip it all if I could, and just have more free time every day. But alas, my digestion rate won't allow it.
—doctorlit, whining about a first world problem most people would love to have