Subject: Pokemon Go (a play in one act).
Author:
Posted on: 2018-04-09 14:03:00 UTC
Scene I. A website
The News: Pokemon Go will let you catch Pokemon!
Huinesoron: Cool!
Huinesoron: Aww, my phone won't run it.
Scene II. A phone shop
Huinesoron: One new phone, please!
Scene III. Outside
Pokemon Go: Gotta catch 'em all!
Huinesoron: I intend to, my friend!
Pokemon Go: ...
Huinesoron: ... but now I'm bored of Rattata.
Pokemon Go: ...
Pokemon Go: Gotta catch 'em all... in Johto!
Huinesoron: Yay! Johto is cool!
Huinesoron: ... so...
Pokemon Go: ... in Hoenn!
Huinesoron: I mean, Gen 3 has some cool Pokemon, but I'm still drowning in Caterpie and Natu here.
Pokemon Go: Spin Pokestops every day for more stuff!
Huinesoron: Which is... nice, I suppose? But stuff doesn't help me find any new Pokemon.
Pokemon Go: Team up with your friends to go on raids at the local gym!
Huinesoron: 'Friends'?
Pokemon Go: Wow! You can catch Legendary Pokemon in these raids!
Huinesoron: Yeah, but I point you at my previous comment. I don't have people I go Pokemon hunting with, and I've only talked to someone at a raid, like, once.
Pokemon Go: ...
Huinesoron: ... soooo I guess I'm never getting a legendary anything, then. Welp.
Pokemon Go: ...
Pokemon Go: Complete missions and win prizes!
Huinesoron: Okay, it's just more Pokeballs and stuff, but at least the missions give me a goal, so I guess that's cool.
Scene IV. Outside. A rainy day.
Prof. Willow outta nowhere: HUINESORON!
Huinesoron: Wait what yes me what?
Prof. Willow: You have completed a simple task once per day for eight days!
Huinesoron: Well, yeah; they were things like 'Catch three Swablu', and I could bin the missions I didn't want and get a new one, it wasn't hard.
Prof. Willow: Here is some stardust for you!
Huinesoron: Yay, it's enough to level up one Pokemon. Once.
Prof. Willow: Here is a mYsTeRy ItEm for you!
Huinesoron: Yay, it's 20 Pokeballs. Saves me going to the Pokestop, I guess.
Prof. Willow: Here is a Pokemon for you to catch!
Huinesoron: Look, it's been Houndour the last three times, it's not that exciting. Can I just--
Moltres: SKREEEEE!
Huinesoron: ... wut.
Moltres: SKREEEEE!
Huinesoron: ... wut.
Ultra Ball: [Flops to the ground]
Huinesoron: ARGH why is my screen wet and stopping the balls throwing properly?
Rain: [Falls]
Kyogre, somewhere: ehehehehehe
Moltres: [Burst out of fourth Ultra Ball] SKREEEEE!
Huinesoron: JUST GET IN THE BALL ALREADY!
Moltres: [Gets in the ball already]
Huinesoron: ... welp, that happened.
So now I have a Moltres, apparently?
I know a lot of people were interested in this game when it first came out. A year in - anyone still playing? How've you found it?
hS