Have the PPC survival kit, invented by me: a half-kilo of lembas and a laspistol.

Hey, I'm Twistey, the one who periodically does something stupid and regrets it. I have several original worlds as well as a ton of fandoms... and joke fics. Lots of joke fics.

For your newbie present, I shall give you this Very Flat Flamethrower. It's great for hiding inside of things, but the fireballs it shoots are a bit slow.

Welcome to the PPC and I hope you have a good time.

-Twistey

Here, have some chocolate and enjoy your stay!

And don't worry, you're not the only one tired of drama. Thanks for the heads-up though.

Have a pile of multi coloured pens.

Ignore the drama and get in touch with your creative side! Enjoy this metaphorical notebook for you to practice writing (if that’s your style).

Yeah, this is a rotten time to join up if you have a Thing about drama. But we're keeping that on the Board for now, in its designated threads, so that the better parts of our community can continue to be.

But hey, since you're here, have a full set of dice! You get to choose your pattern. And as consolation for the shoddy patch you joined during, have this set of steel-plated trousers. You never know where the spikes will be when you're trying to sit down.

Welcome (again)!

If it helps, I wasn't much of a writer when I joined up either.

- Tomash

Have one of my own shed feathers and a complimentary kit of Spikes!

Welcome aboard!

Sorry you had to show up during... this...

But that's no reason to not show courtesy! Here, have an edible computer.