Subject: While you're there...
Author:
Posted on: 2018-10-31 09:33:00 UTC
Why not try writing a prompt relating to Fortnite? Prompt 1 and the singleplayer would probably be the easiest. But it's just a suggestions.
Subject: While you're there...
Author:
Posted on: 2018-10-31 09:33:00 UTC
Why not try writing a prompt relating to Fortnite? Prompt 1 and the singleplayer would probably be the easiest. But it's just a suggestions.
That's right, these prompts are sure to put shivers down your spine. In fact, some people may see them as a Thriller.
Prompt 1: One of your characters meets a supernatural monster
Prompt 2: One of your characters attends a more traditional celebration of Halloween**
**including Samhain, Allhallowtide and anything else you know of from any canon you know of.
Hope you have fun.
Novastorme
I have a little prompt ready for this one, but I saw it again recently, my level of English forbids me of publishing anything without a beta-reader. SpaG is the main issue, but I'll take advices for anything else. Youu can post an answer here, email me, or PM on Discord.
You still have my address, right?
HG
Thank you.
I’ve commented on the GDoc and sent you a mail. Sorry, it doesn’t look good.
HG
Yeah, I'm scrapping this piece and going back to 'brainstorming' here. I'll also take it as a warning against 'spur of the moment' writing.
When I saw this post, my mind jumped instantly to the game Fortnite.
I will go place myself in the naughty corner.
Why not try writing a prompt relating to Fortnite? Prompt 1 and the singleplayer would probably be the easiest. But it's just a suggestions.
"Hi, Will!" VJ said, seeing her warlock partner walking through the RC door.
"Hullo!"
-----
((What? That's it. She met a supernatural monster! :P))
((Okay, the actual prompt will be later))
Elanor held out her bag, beaming up at the elderly lady who opened the door for her.
"Aren't you precious," the lady said, beaming as she dropped a handful of fun-sized candy bars in Elanor's bag. "Are you supposed to be Sleeping Beauty?"
"I'm Princess Aurora!" Elanor declared proudly. She pointed toward the sidewalk. "And Mummy's Maleficent!"
The Aviator lifted a hand in greeting, accidentally knocking his horns askew. "Hullo."
The lady's smile became slightly confused. "Don't you mean your daddy, sweetheart?"
"Nope! Thank you for the candy!" Elanor shut her bag and went skipping back to the Aviator, who scooped her up.
"Kiddo, remember what I said?" he asked as they started towards the next house. "You need to call me Daddy while we're here."
"But you're my mummy," Elanor said stubbornly. "It's too weird to call you Daddy."
The Aviator kissed her nose, then blew a raspberry against her cheek. "It's Halloween," he said. "Think you can be weird for one night? You can call me Mummy when we get back home."
Elanor giggled and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Okay, Daddy."
The main thing I liked about this is how, through the dialogue, you managed to imply that this was taking place somewhere like World One after the Aviator had regenerated into a guy.
- Tomash
Tiger was extremely confused. Normally that was a very rare occurrence, but anyone would be confused by the situation Tiger was currently in.
He was meant to be working together with his sister to fight a Changer, which was a shapeshifting monster which could only be defeated by exploiting its weakness – but the problem was, different Changers had different weaknesses and there was no way to tell which weakness any Changer had.
This particular one was large and seemed to be made of purplish-black mist which was constantly changing shape. That made it a lot harder to attack in any way, because it would just change to avoid the attack.
Magic, on the other hand, couldn’t be dodged and most Changers couldn’t block it either, which gave them one weapon – but there was only so much magic they could use and they didn’t know which spells to use.
Holly shot a Freezing Spell at the Changer, but it had no effect. Tiger, meanwhile, was trying to think of possible weaknesses to attempt to work with. So far, he’d tried wind, fire and water, but none had worked.
The logical next choice was water, but his magic was running dangerously low and he doubted that Holly would try in any way to save him.
That was when the Changer decided to attack. It charged directly towards Holly, who quickly raised a magical shield to keep it away. It then turned on Tiger.
Heart pounding, he tried to summon a shield as Holly had done, but in his nervousness he mispronounced the spell and it didn’t work.
There was no chance for a second attempt. He tried to run, but it was already too late. As the tendrils of mist began to engulf him, he screamed. To his surprise, the mist retreated a little.
Surprised, he screamed again and this time the monster moved away from Tiger. Holly, seeing what was going on, screamed too and the eerie sound echoed through the still valley. A few banshee-like howls later, the purple mist melted away.
“Seriously?” said Tiger. “Its weakness is screaming?”
One comment I have is on paragraph 2, where, on top of the edit "monster whichthat could", you might want to consider breaking up that long sentence a bit and reducing the repetition of "weakness" (if you can find a way to do that). Similar comments apply to paragraph 4.
You've also got an extra comma before "because" in paragraph 3.
That all being said, I think this was a pretty decent fight scene.
- Tomash
I struggled a bit with writing that, and I think my grammar and style suffered as a result. Fight scenes are hard to write!
Hadn’t Tiger just tried water in the previous sentence, and it hadn’t worked? Apparently you were a bit too hasty in posting this.
Since I don’t usually comment if I don’t find something to nitpick, I should use the opportunity to assure you that I liked all your Tiger stories so far.
BTW, in case you didn’t figure it out yet, "fish fingers and custard" (previous prompt) appears to be a Doctor Who reference (eleventh doctor).
HG