Tangential explainer on links

And now: an appeal for sanity. by Huinesoron on 2020-02-05 05:37:11 UTC Reply

You know, there are many people on the Board today who, through no fault of their own, are sane. Some of them were born sane. Some of them became sane later in their lives.

It is up to people like you and me, who are out of our tiny little minds, to try and help these people overcome their sanity. You can start in small ways with ping-pong ball eyes and a funny voice, and then you can paint half of your body red and the other half green, and then you can jump up and down in a bowl of treacle going "squawk, squawk, squawk!" And then you can go "Neurhhh! Neurhh!" and then you can roll around on the floor going "pting pting pting--!"

(This message brought to you by The Reverend Arthur Belling, Vicar of St. Loony-Up-The-Cream-Bun-and-Jam, and his python, Monty)

The appeal. by doctorlit on 2020-02-10 03:17:49 UTC Reply

Ah, excellent. The sluice gates have opened, and the ketchup slides rampant down the mountainside, mingling the hot summer ice with the hard-packed seed fluff from the rabbits. The purple-wood fern trees are unraveling their blooms, and the crickets pour down all-aplenty. Sensing prey, the great walruses heave themselves out from their underground slumber, rattling stone and fork alike, and trundle over the ketchup flow, drinking deep through their hollow tusks. Overhead, the great owls and eagles fly from their nests, where they have painstakingly handcrafted tiny motorbikes every Tuesday for three years, and joyously fling the fruits of their labor into the red flow, ready for another mating season at last.

In the nearby town, the handsome residents have put their slippers in the oven and hung the windows outside to absorb the moisture from the sun. The capitalists solemnly distribute bread to every cat owner (except Randall, naturally) while the communists desperately flock to the banks to hide their gold from the prying eyes of the cabbage dingos. The hungry, shadowy shape that no one talks about that lives in the well that no one uses slinks back down to the deepest point that no one knows about, stifled once more by the ketchup tide above. Its cymbals fall silent for the first time in twelve decades, and it must wait a full moonfall more to steal buttons. Around the well, children and button vipers dance together in celebration, their typical enmity forgotten now for a while. Every closet is soon filled with glass (except for Randall's, naturally), and the beds have vanished entirely.

Behold, the clock bleats! The minute is at last upon us! There will be no more fish-wrestling this year, and our chariots await!

—doctorlit, he who casts down the mustard

My brain hurts in the best possible way. {X D (nm) by Neshomeh on 2020-02-12 00:31:41 UTC Reply

Re: And now: an appeal for sanity. by Jacob175 on 2020-02-06 03:12:05 UTC Reply

Pretty sure the number of people on this board who qualify as still sane can be counted on one hand.

I was going to argue that I was sane... by Snowblaze on 2020-02-06 12:23:56 UTC Reply

but then I realised I'm just good at pretending to be sane. Underneath I am as crazy as the rest of us, if not crazier!

What kind of crazy person would argue that they're sane? by Thoth on 2020-02-06 14:06:09 UTC Reply

No, if you argue that you're sane it's a clear sign of insanity.

Aha, you found the catch. by Huinesoron on 2020-02-06 15:25:52 UTC Reply

I understand it's the best there is.

hS

If you try to convince people you're sane, they'll put you away! by Neshomeh on 2020-02-06 17:51:46 UTC Reply

That's how it worked for Severus Snape in "Subjugation," anyway. >.>

(And if THAT doesn't bake your noodle, there's no help for you.)

~Neshomeh is working on it, albeit very passively, she swears.

Gooooooood niiiiiiiiiightttt *ding ding ding ding ding* (nm) by Thoth on 2020-02-05 19:32:47 UTC Reply
James Veitch is here to help! by Neshomeh on 2020-02-05 17:32:15 UTC Reply

Here is a story about one noble screwball driving some very deserving scammers 'round the twist: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C4Uc-cztsJo

Enjoy!

~Neshomeh

There is no bonanza going on. by Huinesoron on 2020-02-05 23:42:01 UTC Reply

The Reverend Belling thanks you for this assistance in his campaign, and presents you with a free complimentary.

hS
I love James Veitch! by Good Mod Addict on 2020-02-05 18:41:18 UTC Plug Reply

The other video of his I've seen a lot is this one, where things get a little out of control with roommate living agreements.
Tangential explainer on links by Tomash on 2020-02-05 18:34:08 UTC Reply
Just including links in your post, like http://example.com/ doesn't work here

The reason for this is that, unlike on the old Board, we tell Google to follow our links (so it finds things like missions). The downside to that policy, as I learned mid-last year, is that if you have a thing you can chuck links into and get them indexed by Google, it'll get used by spammers (which, given that that this is the Board and not free advertising space for Dr. McSketchpill's Canadian pharmacy, we don't want).

However, spammers are opportunistic, and so don't usually go through the bother of checking the link syntax of the place they're spamming. At best, they try the way it worked on old forums, [url=http;//example.com/]words[/url], which isn't how it works here either.

Here, there's two ways to make a link
- <a href="http://example.com">words</a> gives words
- [words](http://example.com) gives words as well

Huh, cool, didn't know that second format. by Good Mod Addict on 2020-02-05 18:37:39 UTC Reply

I've been typing the whole "a href" thing out for years now whenever I wanted to link anything online...

The second one is Markdown syntax by Tomash on 2020-02-06 07:20:23 UTC Reply

It works on the new Board, Reddit, Github, and various other websites.