Subject: re: emotionally heavy interlude
Posted on: 2023-01-23 16:59:05 UTC
Kind of hate the way this starts, with Urato and Inasuke not even giving Kaguya a chance to explain anything before ripping into him. I guess I'm just more in tune with words than emotions, but it feels wild to me that they wouldn't check in on him first and discuss what happened after.
I did, however, enjoy the part where Kaguya and Momoka finally talked about their relationship with each other. I'm hoping to see a more balanced power dynamic between them moving forward, but even if I don't get that, I'm glad Kaguya at least recognizes Momoka's feelings better now.
A couple grammar errors:
"Once RC 381's screen door slid close behind the group . . ."
"slid closed "
". . . who was still having his back turned to her."
Okay, I'm being a little nitpicky here, but it's less clunky to say, "still had his back turned"
—doctorlit kinda wishes Urato had gotten slapped too; he is the most slappable of the group