Subject: Thoughts, notes
Author:
Posted on: 2023-05-03 03:26:48 UTC

  • I think you wanted "You're not the one who has to do this, are you?" instead of "do you?" near the beginning
  • I'm slightly lost at the beginning, but I'm following that this is pre-mission chaos well enough
  • Phil, Spensor, stop bugging the IO, you should know better probably
  • Nice to see missions pointing out in-character stuff too
  • Counch/Puntercouch :)
  • ... Ok, the Punch/Counterpunch gag is definitely a good bit
  • The Marquis will take Phil's complaint and consider it a success
  • I'm pretty sure the forklift certification is a self-certification around here
  • The Cosmic Rust bit was a nice bit of silliness at the ending

Overall, I think the mission was solid. The amount of actual reference to the badfic seemed TOS-y, which is perfectly fine, but I figured it was worth noting.

I can say that the story didn't quite "grab" me, I think it was a bit low on description and there were times where it was hard to follow what was going on, but I don't know if that's you or trouble on my end.

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